(Closed) Sleep training questions !!!

posted 4 years ago in Parenting
Post # 2
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

thelightofarose:  

1. What method did you use? How long did your baby cry? Or did your baby not cry at all? We didnt use a method.  I would typically let him cry for a minute max before going in and then i would just make sure he wasn’t poopy give him his paci and leave the room.  Usually worked within the first 2 trips to his room.  

2. How old was your baby? He was pretty much 3 months when he started sleeping through the night.  He is 5 months old and still is doing the same thing – pretty much sleeps from anywhere between 730-930pm to 5-7am.

3. Was your baby a tummy sleeper and/or was he/she able to roll over to the tummy when you sleep trained?  He is a back sleeper although he was starting to roll when we started.  Now he will roll back and forth but typically does not move until the morning when he starts rustling to get up.  

4. Did you hire a sleep consultant? Didn’t even know this was a thing – no it pretty much came naturally to him

5. Any advice is appreciated. – do what is best for you – there is no right way to do it.  My mom said we were sleeping through the night at 6 weeks – we got lucky and he was sleeping through at 3 months.  It also coincided with me returning to work which is nice.  I think alot has to do with him but also – he is tired he has busy days at daycare interacting with different people.

 

Good luck!

 

 

Post # 3
Member
3009 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

thelightofarose:  

1. What method did you use? How long did your baby cry? Or did your baby not cry at all? I tried the “No-Cry Sleep Solution” from the book of the same name, and had minimal success. I also read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems (Ferber). Then we did a step-down method since baby could only fall asleep at the breast, and would wake up every 20 mins to 3 hours during the night when he was obviously not hungry. So for five days we rocked him to sleep, then for five days rocked him until he was almost asleep and then patted/shushed him, then put him down awake and patted/shushed him. Then putting him down awake and leaving the room was the last bit and we did a Ferber method where we’d go in and pat/shush at longer intervals. It sounds complicated, but it wasn’t really. We just were more open to it taking longer since I wasn’t comfortable just straight-up letting him cry. I continued to allow him to nurse twice a night at first (just did the pat/shush on non-feeding wake-ups and then went down to once per night. Sometimes he sleeps through the night now and sometimes wakes up once to nurse at 11 months old.

2. How old was your baby? He was 6 months old. At five months I was desperate and horribly sleep deprived but I said I’d give it one more month to see if he would sleep better on his own. It only got worse and I wish I’d sleep-trained him earlier. For us sleep training did not mean night-weaning since i was not ready to night wean him at that time.

3. Was your baby a tummy sleeper and/or was he/she able to roll over to the tummy when you sleep trained? No, he likes to sleep on his back. Plus he wore a Magic Merlin sleepsuit which prevented him rolling to his tummy. Once he outgrew the Merlin he would roll onto his tummy and sleep like that sometimes but I continued to put him down on his back.

4. Did you hire a sleep consultant? Yes, a phone consultation. We did after the “no-cry” solution didn’t work and I knew I couldn’t just let him cry indefinitely. She gave us the step-down program and it worked really well. Plus helped us with timing of his naps and such. I just needed to ask questions and talk to someone about it that knew what they were talking about. It was worth the $100! I got some bad advice from people I knew that just frustrated me.

5. Any advice is appreciated. Have scheduled naps and a bedtime routine. That way your baby knows it’s time to sleep and her body expects it, too. Listen to your gut. There was certainly plenty of “protest crying” from our son, but if he really started to scream I’d go in at reassure him. Sometimes he’d need to burp after crying for a bit so I would always do that- I didn’t want him crying because his tummy hurt! You don’t have to be super rigid about whatever method you choose. Try to be consistent but follow your heart. My son got a cold when we were almost done with the program so we put it on hold for a few days until he was better. It set us back a tiny bit but not much. Anyways, we’ve had some regressions (9 month regression, after we had a red-eye flight, etc) but on the whole it’s really worked. Most times I can put him down awake for naps and bedtime, tell him I love him, leave the room and he falls asleep. Good luck!

Post # 4
Member
4131 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

1. What method did you use? How long did your baby cry? Or did your baby not cry at all?

My daughter slept really well, in a crib in our room, until she was about 4 months. then all hell broke loose ๐Ÿ™‚ we started co sleeping because it worked. By 10 months, I’d had it was co sleeping and it wasn’t really working for Dear Daughter anymore either. So we sleep trained. I was very against CIO, so we started with the no cry methods – didn’t work and everyone was exhausted. So we did Ferber  – put her in crib, set timer for 3 minutes, check on her, 5 minutes, check in, 7 minutes, check in, 10 minutes, etc. She was asleep by the middle of the first 10 minute block  so I think that equals about 25 minutes or so of crying. Night two, less than 10 minutes of crying. By night 3, it was 2 minutes or less. After a week and a half or so, she wasn’t crying at all, just rolling over and going to sleep  

2. How old was your baby?

11 months

3. Was your baby a tummy sleeper and/or was he/she able to roll over to the tummy when you sleep trained?

 

she is very much a tummy/side sleeper  and she likes to move around A LOT  so having space in her crib to move without hitti me or Darling Husband was wonderful ๐Ÿ™‚

4. Did you hire a sleep consultant?

nope. 

Post # 5
Member
4131 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Oh advice! For us, the nighttime routine was really important. Dinner, play for a bit, bath, book, singing a bit, then bed. We started this while we were still co sleeping but when we went to putting her in the crib it became crucial. Now (it’s been 3 weeks of her in her crib), as soon as she’s out of the bath, she rubbing her eyes. She sits calmly and relaxes as we read a book, then by the end of one “rock a bye baby”, she’s ready for sleep ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
Member
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

thelightofarose:  We are just in the middle of sleep training our LO right now and Im fairly happy with how things are going. I will say that in the beginning I was very against CIO and wanted to avoid it at all costs…but our baby being well…our baby ๐Ÿ˜‰ there was just no avoiding crying (shes a crier)

1) we ended up doing straight up old fashoned CIO after hiring a sleep consultant and we had lengthly discussions on what was going to happen.I was still hesitant the day we started but I was also at my wits end and knew we had to at least try. Dear Daughter has had EPIC long multiple hour cry sessions since shes been born so I thought “here we go” and theres no way she would fall in the “typical” range of what they say (expect 45-60 minutes the first night). Well much to my surprise she started crying and we put on the timer and she only cried for 25 minutes and she was out like a light! She woke up a few times that night during the times she normally would (mostly for food) and she cried for about 30-45 min at one point but got herself back to sleep. Each day got better and better and by the third night it was like 5-10 minutes of crying…sometimes just fussing.

2) she was about 4.5 months when we started…she will be 5 months next week.

3) funny enough she JUST started rolling yesterday!! so we;re dealing with that now….when we started no..and she sleep on her back/side, but now that shes rolling shes completely on her tummy within 2 min of being in the crib and she actually sleeps longer now!

4) we did…. but in reality she didnt tell us (mostly) anything we didnt already know just the reassurance this is what she and us need!

I will give you some tips tho….. the #1 thing you need to know (which is obvious) but true is BE CONSISTANT….the minute you waiver or break the worse it will make it because then the baby knows (for ex: “all I have to do to get mommy in the room is cry harder for longer”) 

I was shocked because I really did think it would be worse….she normally cries hard like HARD to point of loosing breath and she never did that…. I was also shocked at the length of time. I never thought she would self soothe in 25 minutes?? are you kidding. GIVE IT A CHANCE whatever method your doing….(I dont know exactly what extinction method is). 

The one thing the consultant said is that you have to remember the baby really is fine, they’re just PISSED because your supposed to be in there rocking them to sleep or whatever. 

#2 have a good bedtime routine but keep it short (some people drag it out but babies loose interest and the ability to connect the dots its bedtime after a half hour….) The one thing she explained in detail was we needed to feed her BEFORE the rest of bedtime routine…i thought well NO… the later I feed her the longer she will last? Nope… The closer you feed the baby before you put them down …means they will be trying to digest the food while trying to get to sleep. So while their bodies are trying to shut down to get rest, everything else just kicked into high gear to digest the turkey dinner sized bottle you just gave them (think about how you feel after your stuffed…and try to go to bed right away…not great), make sense?? It basically makes them MORE restless and can wake them up, So Feed the baby 45 min before your putting them in the crib. THEN do bath, jammies, story etc whatever you do…. so they have time to start digesting.

#3 Early bedtime…. 4-5 month olds should be in the crib by 8pm (with the expectation of being awake at 7am) The consultant said they should/can easily be sleeping for 11 hours (as long as they are over 13lbs) I thought there was NO WAY my baby who had been up until now awake for 2 feeds a night would go all night with no food!!!!! 

Well sure enough after the first night (she woke up and cried for a half hour at those times) she ended up going back to sleep just fine and by the next night she didnt even wake up fir the first one…. and by the third night she slept through…. I knew she was definatly waking out of habit for the first because it didnt matter what time we fed her (8pm or 10pm) she would wake at the same time. 

**Cutting out night feedings/pushng through is something you will have to judge with your own baby! I dont know if they are having them or not…. but I personally knew in my gut she didnt really need them anymore.

#4 in regards to bedtime routine she recommended Darling Husband would be the one to do the last part of bedtime routine and put her down! Babies will cry longer/harder for mommy! You can share it once training is over but during that time get him to do it!

#5 no diaper changes at night unless poopy. I generally put the next size up on Dear Daughter cause it does technically fit…but i figure better to have more coverage just in case.

I can honestly say that since training her, she is like a diff baby. She isnt cranky anymore, shes so happy…shes just a delight (not that she wasnt but you know what I mean). She smiles when she see’s me coming for her…

she still fusses and cries a little when we put her down but thats just part of her soothing technique! Its been one full week and I wish we had done this sooner

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  shanbp.
Post # 7
Member
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

OH I forgot one….the consultant said they need to be awake when you put them down NOT drowsy. Making them drowsy as other sources say to do is another crutch… if the baby wakes at night and your not there to make them drowsy again, then thats not fair is it? They need to self soothe from an awake state!

so #6…DH/partner takes them into room in upright position and walks around the room saying goodnight to everything (toys, the window, chair…whatever is there) and then you say “Goodnight my darling, I love you very much and I’ll see you in the morning…” then into the crib and you leave!

I will say that prior to training we had to rock her just perfectly… and she used a pacifier …and then did the “transfer” into the crib which only resulted in her usually waking up. Now? we put her in the crib 100% awake with no paci and shes alseep in 5-10 min…(sometimes she “talks” to herself for a while)

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  shanbp.
Post # 8
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

thelightofarose:  

We decided to sleep train around 5.5 months. Our reasons were 1) we wanted to tranisition him to the crib in his own room (he had slept in a rock n play in our room until then) 2) his sleep habits were getting worse – he could not put himself to sleep without incessant rocking and all sorts of other ridiculousness that we trapped ourselves into 3) our nanny was starting when he turned 6 months and we wanted to get him started on getting used to putting himself to sleep before she started and 4) his naps stunk – like sometimes 15 minutes long. I read every sleep book out there (no cry, ferber, weisenbluth to name a few – we didn’t hire a consultant) and I think the eventual method that we settled on was an adaptation of extinction. Our main goal around sleep training was for him to figure out self settling and to be able to put himself to sleep. It took a couple of long weeks, with us stretching out the time between the “checks” but we eventually realized that for us we were doing more harm in checking on him then letting him figure it out. It was really tough on me, but in hindsight, it was the right move for us. By the time he was just over 6 months he was able to put himself to sleep and his naps improved greatly – by 7 months we would just put him down in his crib and he consistently took two 90-120 minute naps a day. My son is now 12 months and he is just recently fully sleeping throughout the night. Our sleep training wasn’t focused on that part of the sleep – and I continued to respond and nurse him when he would cry out in the night – averaging about 3 times (though sometimes more) until 8-9 months and then about twice a night until 11 months and now mostly not at all but sometimes once during the night.  Not sure if that was too clear, and to be honest, I’m surprised that I don’t remember all the details around it – man, my head was in a sleepless fuzz throughout it all.  Best of luck to you! It’s hard but worth it to get them sleeping well.  

 

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