(Closed) Small vent- don’t RSVP yes if you have no intention of actually coming

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
1501 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I feel you on this.

But just remember that no matter who is there or not it is your special day and enjoy it!

Post # 4
7295 posts
Busy Beekeeper

ya, that is super annoying. i had no shows to my BBQ reception, and while it was “just a BBQ”, i bought food and alcohol based on the number of people i was expecting and i was trying to save wherever i could.

Post # 5
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We had a couple of now shows as well, it and was very frustrating as our total guest list was about 55 people and them not showing left another couple sitting at a table by themselves!

And then this woman facebooked us later like nothing had happened. ughh I feel ya!

Post # 6
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

We had 8 people who didn’t show the day of!!! I was so pissed, plus the fact that we didn’t get to take the extra food with us that we paid for

Post # 7
1986 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

This is one of the reasons I’m glad I don’t have to give my final count until 3 days out!

That is really frustrating- I’m sorry

Post # 8
2889 posts
Sugar bee

Call your vendor, see if they are willing to meet you in teh middle. At the very least, they will prepare 4 less meals or redistribute the food to other guests. I imagine it is common to have 1-2 last minute no shows as well. It does not hurt to at least give them notice and ask if they can do something to reduce your cost.

ETA: Our caterer packed up the extra meals and sent them home with my parents which was super nice. Darling Husband and my meals were packaged up and sent home as well sicne we didn’t get around to eating more than apps and the salad course.

Post # 10
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I understand I have that situation going on but I have a while before the wedding. People who said they were coming now arent because they can’t find a baby sitter etc. My mom has already paid the catering company (my aunt) the full amount for 100 people. But it’s okay because it will just be extra food for those people.


See if the cater can put that extra food in some type of container for you to take home to have something to eat after you leave or something. Or like they said spread the food out so some people will get a little more like you and your hubby and some of the wedding party.

Post # 12
1807 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m nervous about this. I’ve had a couple people say yes, but I have a feeling they’ll backout. I’m waiting to give my number til the absolute deadline…I’ll probably still get screwed :/

Post # 13
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Oooohhh yeah… I’m having a cocktail reception so I understand. You may be able to contact them and explain the situation. I doubt they will give your money back but maybe they can work with you on something. Maybe you can get a extra special dish for you and the FH that no one else haves.

Post # 14
33 posts
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am so sorry that is really annoying. We had a few people that didn’t show up too. We had a really small wedding and only invited 35 people. We had about 4 RSVP yes and then completely not show up.

It is frustrating because you already paid for their meal and alcohol! But at the end of the day it is what it is. You just kind of have to let it go and enjoy your day. I had somebody tell me they woke up sick and were not able to come. I just told them it was fine and blew it off. After it’s all said and done you just realize that the people that love you and should be there are.

Post # 15
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I’ve had some of my friends tell me that I should just subtract 4 people from the total guest count to account for no-shows and late responders.  It sounds great in theory, but I’m not sure I could pull the trigger on that one. 

That’s too bad that those people didn’t RSVP promptly – it sounds really frustrating.

Post # 16
5822 posts
Bee Keeper

Well look at it this way…maybe someone will be rude and come with four uninvited guests, and at least the food is taken care of!

(We had that happen actually, so it worked out.)

The topic ‘Small vent- don’t RSVP yes if you have no intention of actually coming’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors