(Closed) Small wedding regret?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 33
Member
2445 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I had 50 guests and it was perfect. I would do it the same way, every time. It’s the perfect balance between intimate and still a celebration. I’ve never for a second wished that more people were there!

Post # 34
Member
1131 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

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asocalbee:  LOL probably.  My husband kept trying to talk me into a small wedding but I got all caught up on the big wedding stuff that I wouldn’t listen.  After I saw all that money being spend I started to see what he was saying.  Even though I have this regret now I don’t think I would have changed it for anything.  I still really enjoyed my wedding, just that I felt like I didn’t have much time for anything else… LOL and I am really starting to miss that money we spent…

Post # 35
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

We had 50 people and I loved it too.  I did have 2 people that were maybes that didn’t end up coming (for good reasons and I knew a couple days in advance of the wedding), and we did have a few empty seats at the ceremony but I honestly didn’t really think about it until right now.  I wanted 25 chairs on each side of the aisle, but I didn’t consider the fact that 6 of our guests were the wedding party standing up front.  So in this picture we have 6 empty seats.  This picture is the only one I have that shows it and it really doesn’t bother me, but I suppose it’s something you can consider.  The reception had a seating chart so I didn’t have any empty seats there.  I easily could have (and maybe should have) just asked someone to remove those extra seats from the last row, but oh well!

Sometimes I think our wedding looks small in the photos, but then I remember how happy I was to be able to say hello to every guest and planning was much simpler when only coordinating 50 people.  I don’t think you will regret your decision.  Just make sure your venue isn’t too large for your number of guests.  We had a very full-looking reception since we had a small-ish room, though unfortunately I didn’t really get any pictures showing that.

Post # 36
Member
2091 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I had about 45 people, and I have no regrets. It was wonderful. We knew that everyone there was supportive of us and loved us. We paid it in full ourselves mostly in advance. It was just as it should have been. Bigger weddings are not necessarily “better”. As long as you walk away married, your wedding was a success. Nothing else matters. I have a picture that includes every person that attended! That would have been next to impossible with 500 people there. I also didn’t have to skimp with the things that I really wanted because there were less people to take care of. It was great!!! I think that you will be pleasantly surprised! 

Post # 37
Hostess
10381 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

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asocalbee:  I do have a bit of small wedding regret. My guest list was very small, 20 people. The problem was that DH and I invited 4 friends to our wedding, which meant we had to make sacrifices when it came to our other friends.

In hindsight, we should either had 0 friends, or had a bigger wedding to include others. My other friends that weren’t invited felt like I was playing favorites, and nearly a year later I still have strained relationships with them.

Everything about the day was PERFECT. The day after, not so much. I woke up to a barrage of “FUCK YOU” text messages on our honeymoon. It wasn’t pretty. BUT, at the same time, I think I might have regretted having those same asshole people in our wedding pics years later, so who knows, maybe I made the right call and it was just a matter of time before those friendships dissolved anyways. 

Post # 38
Member
4943 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

 

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asocalbee:  When my ex husband and I were married, we only had about 40 guests. And it was perfect! LIke you mentioned, we had time to spend time with everyone there. No regrets.

My wedding to my current (and last! haha) husband was an elopement, so we had zero guests. And I loved that, too!

Post # 39
Member
4943 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

 

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FutureDrAtkins:  Geez! If that’s how they behave, I’d be glad they weren’t there!

Post # 40
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

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FutureDrAtkins:  Gee gad, that’s terrible! 🙁 I think you’re right, you would not have wanted those terrible people there anyway. Who doesn’t understand tiny guest lists or primarily family ones, at least? They should have still been happy for you!

Post # 41
Member
4889 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Our wedding ceremony was only about 40-some people. It included parents, siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles. We did have a cousin of DH there (no others), but he was our videographer.

Our small wedding was due to DH wanting that. He’s not big on being the center of attention and has some bad anxiety when it comes to being in front of a ton of people. I didn’t care what we did, but knew my mom was not happy (she had her own visions of what she wanted her oldest daughters wedding to be like), as one of my cousins got married the year before and only had parents, siblings and grandparents there. She felt slighted, as our family is small to begin with and thought we should be there too – and that was the decision of my cousins now wife. Even after explaining anxiety issues that anyone could have, I still don’t think she liked the idea but it was our wedding ceremony and she would have to get over it.

Our reception was big. DH’s family (and him) know a lot of people as they’re from a small town. My mom questioned why the reception wasn’t that big of a deal versus the ceremony. Well, get some drinks into DH and he’s usually good. Either way, it was fine. I managed to talk to everyone I wanted to and no one thought it was odd (or at least to our faces anyway) that they were only invited to the reception.

It was still costly due to teh size, but I liked our ceremony and looking back, it was great and our own.

Post # 42
Member
1263 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We had 62 guests at our wedding and I wouldn’t change a thing. It was much less stressful, and when we looked around the room, it was all of our family and closest friends who were there to support us. Since we only had close family and friends, everyone we invited came with the exception of one couple who had just had a baby and live in another country, so definitely understandable!

Also, my husband and I are not people that enjoy being the center of attention, so it was much less stressful to have fewer people there! The smaller wedding we had was absolutely perfect for us!

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