So angry with "Bride"!

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 106
Member
4121 posts
Honey bee

khaleesi13 :  Thank you for pointing out the “weather” thing. I was gonna say something about it but you beat me to it. I am in disbelief how can a highly educated “attorney” who lives such a perfect and “pure” life not know the difference. 

Post # 107
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

OP I’m very religious my mom is even a youth pastor at her church. I had a friend who got married two years before the wedding for military reasons. My mother and I happily attended the wedding her as the officiant and I as a bridesmaid. For us the law has no bearing on religion. I would show your friend compassion. Barring that you did her a service by showing her your true colors. May you and your friend be blessed. <3

 

Post # 108
Member
1891 posts
Buzzing bee

justanormalgal :  My girl cousin is doing this same thing right now lol. She lied to our entire extended family and all of her friends about being married already bc she says she is worried if people know than they won’t come to her wedding. I honestly hate this cousin of mine and would love to let it slip she is already married to the whole family. The only thing keeping me from doing that is that she gave my boyfriend a plus one and this is one of the only opportunities for him to meet my extended family as the wedding is out here on the East Coast where we live. 

She got married already bc her husband is in the military and she is a lawyer. It takes 6 months from marriage to be able to apply to be a lawyer in the state they are moving to bc if you are the wife of someone in the military and a lawyer they have an acception so you don’t have to retake the bar in each state. It was a legit reason but she didn’t just go to the court and have a court house wedding. My mom and i found out she LEGIT GOT MARRIED in a church, with their parents and siblings. Her engagement photos were actually HER WEDDING PHOTOS. 

I think she is a jerk bc if you need to be official for paperwork or something logistical fine. But to all out have a wedding where your brother sings at it and it is in a Church. But then lie to everyone so you can have a big wedding later and have gifts? SHADY. SO it does happen. 

Post # 109
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2018

We’re having a destination wedding and a few people (including both sets of parents) actually asked if we were doing the getting married part of the whole at home to keep things simple paperwork-wise.  

We’re not – it was important to me that our wedding actually be a wedding – and if we had we would have been upfront about it. But I do know that a lot of people do this for a number of reasons. 

Post # 110
Member
357 posts
Helper bee

to quote a PP “Think about why gossiping and fake outrage over your supposed friend is so appealing to you.”

Post # 111
Member
3522 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

I’m not sure why this cropped back up 3 months after it was posted… but…

I honestly don’t see the problem here? Why are people so mad? I get that her reasoning sounded pretty materialistic, but I really don’t see an issue with getting legally married for pragmatic purposes and then having the big ‘do with friends and family at a later date. There are plenty of good reasons why people might do that, and it’s just petty to say it’s not a “real” wedding and she’s not a “real” bride.

Post # 112
Member
374 posts
Helper bee

ladyjane123 :  Yeah it’s bad that she’s deceiving people but you don’t come off very good either by going to the “wedding” of a cousin you hate just so you can use the opportunity to introduce your Boyfriend or Best Friend around to the family, either.

Post # 113
Member
2013 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Doesnt  God OP  also teach you not to judge as that’s exactly what you’re doing.

You’re clearly the problem…

Post # 114
Member
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I read the original post and think maybe she didn’t tell anyone because of the horrid judgemental back lash she knew she’d get from everyone. Which she clearly did…. 

 

People need to calm down. She hasn’t hurt anyone and yes maybe she gave materialistic reasons, but from your original post, I’m guessing you and the bride are pretty young. So yeah she’ll grow out of it. And hopefully OP will to. 

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