- 6 years ago
- Wedding: December 2012
I need some help or advice or something. I have been engaged since March. We’ve had to change the date and location of the wedding for multiple reasons. First, I was planning to do it on the date of my parent’s 20th anniversary, to commorate it and what not, but my mom was upset because “what if I wanted to get away for my anniversary, not spend the day worrying about Brittany’s wedding.” When I asked my sister to be my maid of honor, she responded with, “Will it be a lot of work? Well, I guess I don’t want one of your friends standing next to you when you get married, so okay.” Then my 3 of my cousins also got engaged and it became a mess.
I also know that my parents will not be helping much financially with the wedding, so I’ve been trying to come up with inexpensive locations where we can still have our family and friends involved. I thought maybe a destination wedding to Jamaica would be awesome because it would be intimate, romantic, and gorgeous. However, my mom and dad said they wouldn’t spend the money to come (and trust me, they have the money).
Last night, I told my dad that we were thinking of doing it this New Year’s Eve. Instead of being supportive, my dad went into an hour long lecture on why I shouldn’t get married. It boiled down to money and the fact that in today’s economy, we shouldn’t be spending money on a wedding. We are currently living with my fiancee’s parents and searching for an apartment (they are hard to find in Bismarck, ND). He said that people will talk and think it’s bad that we spent money on a wedding instead of a place to live. I don’t see why we can’t have a wedding and find a place to live, but he seems to think that if we spend any kind of money on a wedding will be in financial trouble and fight about money for the rest of our lives.
I had a talk with a couple friends, and they said that I need to focus on making myself and Andy happy and surround myself with supportive people. I agreed, and Andy and I decided to have the wedding on 12/31/12, and forget about what my family says.
Now it turns out that one of my best friends in the world (one of my bridesmaids) has to attend her cousin’s wedding on the date we want. She’s not in her cousin’s wedding, but she thinks it’ll cause problems with the extended family if she doesn’t go. I understand her decision, but I can’t imagine getting married without her there, but I’m so tired of changing the date.
I don’t know what to do! I’m a mess!