(Closed) So Confused!!!!!!!!

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@SpeedGirl: Relax, breathe- you’ll be fine! It get’s really stressful, but just keep your head straight.

First step is to figure our your budget. Once you’ve done that, make a list of what the most important things are to you and your fiance. Is it having everyone you know at the wedding? Is it having the dream dress? Is it having the most delicious food you can find? Is it making sure your day is the least amount of stress possible?

From there, you can allocate how much should go to what and then find what is in your price range.

One step at a time! You can do it! 🙂 I would advise you to browse through some of the threads on here of purchases other brides regretted. That helped me keep my eye on the prize and not get overemotional about something I probably wouldn’t care about the day after.

Best of luck and congrats!!

Post # 4
1227 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Wedding planning is like that – the start of it can be a real nightmare.

What I think would be helpful is if you were to really get your vision of what you and your husband want nailed down. Ask yourselves what kind of wedding do you picture for you and your husband? Casual or elegant? Modern or traditional? Artsy? Eco-friendly? Glamourous? Do you picture it with a theme?

Something that really helped me with this was to look around on weddingbee and google, find a bunch of images that I liked, then put them together into an inspiration board. I used the free software Mosaic Maker to put them all together in a little collage. (http://bighugelabs.com/mosaic.php) Once you get them all together, you might see a pattern emerge. Then, you can go from there.

As far as your husband being really laidback and not giving input, you might need to dig a little and find out what aspects are really important to him. For instance, many guys feel strongly about picking out their and their groomsmen’s attire. Some guys are really into food and want to be more involved with that. If you find the things he really has an interest in and has stronger feelings about how they turn out, he’ll be more likely to give you his input and help.


Post # 6
16 posts

You are not alone! I just got through planning my wedding and I am currently helping my 2 bf’s plan theirs, my sister in law just got engaged, and my husband’s cousin is about to. It’s crazy, in my opinion the wedding process is terrible. It was lots of fighting and stressing. Bottom line is there is no way around it.

A few things..

You need to set a budget – you can’t do anything without one.

I wouldn’t do fake flowers – they look cheap and people can tell. If you are wanting to save money just use real flowers for the bouquets and use candles or another centerpiece for decorations.

Most of the time you can’t bring in outside catering if you are renting out a venue.

Hope that helps!

Ann ~ [link removed for self-promotion]

Post # 7
273 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I have never been to a birthday party that resembles any wedding I’ve been to.  I mean, my wedding is costing close to $20K – I think our most recent house cocktail party might have run me $500.  I understand where your Fiance is coming from, but its not that simple unless you are having a backyard affair.  

It is easy to get swept away with the ‘Wedding Industrial Complex (WIC)’ where you feel like you NEED to do things a certain way just because that’s how so-and-so thinks it should be done.  Unless so-and-so is footing the bill, you can do whatever you want.

The only really annoying thing I encountered during planning was that I did not get to choose the season and/or date for my ceremony. I wanted a Fall wedding – but in the area I’m getting married in, that is considered peak season and you need a minimum of 200 guests (which is about double my final guest count).  Even if I wanted a Fall wedding, all of the venues were booked up at least 18 months in advance.  Annoying.  A long engagement just creates more stress – for me at least.

Good luck – do your best to stay sane.  It really is just one wonderful day in a series of more wonderful days!

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