- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
So My Dad isn’t invited to my wedding. My father is an emotional wreck and extrememly verbally abusive so i have chosen (months and months ago) not to have a relationship with him. I must add that this is after years and years of severe emotional abuse and anger issues being dealt with. The last straw came when my father (who i truly believe is mentally ill ad severely bipolar<not making a joke at all>) had a severe panick/depression attack and bashed his head into a wall in front of me cause him to knock himself out and i had to call 911 and have him sent to the county mental facility. (i also might mention that i am an only child <who was adopted, at birth>, and my parents are divorced <and have been since I was 2, due to my mother being unable (obviously, for understandable reasons) to deal with my father any longer>) SO my dad and I havent spoken since march (since just after he was released from mental health) snd he is fully aware that i no longer want him in my life and he is not coming to my wedding.
SO now with that said, my grandmother (my dad’s mom) and I have a great relationship she lives in another state but i talk to her literally almost every morning Monday- Friday on the way to work and sometimes at lunch or on the way home as well. We hae an amzing relationship and she’s been there (well via phone, email, and Facebook) for everystep of my life and now every piece of my wedding down to my shoes and jewelry.
Then just the other day, after months of helping me plan and exclaiming over my wedding and how excited she is. My Grandma drops the bomb. She’s not sure if she’s going to come now… and the reason. She think’s she will be to sad at my wedding! Because he’s not there!
And if she doesn’t come one of my Aunts definitely wont come. Which means the only other aunt on that side of the family will probably feel severely awkward and back out as well. I feel so unimportant and like a footnote in their feelings toward my wedding.
I am not a bridezilla.. or even a self absorbed bride. But I feel like they aren;t even considering my feelings or reasoning in their feelings and actions! I just feel sad… and my wedding is less than 2 months away 🙁
I must also add that my dad and I didn’t spend the most time together in my life. My step dad raised me (and he will be the one giving me away). He moved in with us when I was five and was there for everything. My Dad lived almost 4 hours away and i only saw him every other weekend if that. I was always much closer with my grandma than with him and for the past 3 years have definitely talked to her more than anyone else in the family… possibly even more than my mom sometimes. It crushes me that she doesn’t feel she can come because I have chosen to remove a mentally ill abusive person from my life…
thoughts please (and sorry for being so long winded)