(Closed) SO doesn't want to get married yet…

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
36 posts
Newbee

[comment moderated for snark]

Post # 4
Member
1239 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@LadyX:  sorry to hear that.

Post # 5
Member
36 posts
Newbee

[comment moderated for snark/baiting]

Post # 6
Member
1480 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@TheMan40:  It’s better than saying her Fiance just wants to have sex with her and then bone out. GO AWAY.

Post # 8
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Man40 – what a pathetic little being you are. It is so sad that you not only need to find some sort of happiness by tearing others down (the way you obviously have been in your life) but you actually look back to find some sort of validation (like you probably have been doing all your life). What’s the 40 for? Your IQ? The number of years you’ve been alone? The ounces of beer it took for you to turn into a complete jackass?

Post # 10
Member
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

It was a matter of time before trolls and angry little men started to creep their way into the beehive. Sorry OP, ignore it.

 

Back to your post. Sorry, this sounds so rough. Yes, I understand you are worried that perhaps there is more than meets the eye going on…which I can understand. Citing money problems and a few extra lbs as the reason for postponing yet another wedding date sounds fishy, especially since you just wanted to elope. 

I’d leave the subject for a few days and then ask to have a serious discussion about setting a date. For example, will he agree to a date in 3 months? 6 months? How much time does he want? If he still wont commit to another date, then I’d say you have some serious thinking to do.

But try and give him the benefit of the doubt. If it’s really his appearance he’s worried about, well, we’ve all been there where we planned to loose weight and it never happend. Still, I think you have every right to feel upset and put out and next time I think you should forget about hiding how hurt you are and show him how he’s making you feel. 

Post # 11
Member
625 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I just assued he was 40. I assume when youre a lonely 40 year old you have nothing beter to do than sit in your basement and troll.

Post # 12
Member
36 posts
Newbee

[comment moderated for snark]

Post # 13
Member
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

It hink the best thing to do is ignore it you guys and report it. OP is asking for help here…who cares about this guy. Not me. 

Post # 14
Member
36 posts
Newbee

[comment moderated for snark]

Post # 15
Member
625 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

To the OP… I’m curious why he’d feel better if “no one was there.” He’s met your friends, correct? they know what he looks like. It seems strange that he would cite this as a reason for discomfort… unless he has anxiety issues as well or something?

 

Post # 16
Member
60 posts
Worker bee

I’m sorry to hear that 🙁 by the sound of it, you both love each other but there is just something that bothers him. I’ve been to a situation where everything was ok with me and SO then all of the sudden, he changed his mind. From my experience, the real reason why he acted like that might surprise you (highly unexpected). 

My opinion is to be strong and pull yourself together first then when you are ready, have a conversation with him that Focus only on him (other things might effect your thinking – like what would people think etc) maybe you can find out an underlying problem that you never heard of, he could be scared to talk to you about this because you might cry or end up hurting you. Once you show that you are 100% supportive and accept whatever it is regardless the situation, hope he will open up. 

If he really opens up, make sure you are ready for a solution that 100% shows that you respect him and put him first. Don’t cry or scream or yell or swear! Hope this helps! Good luck and stay strong :))

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