Post # 1
we’re not technically engaged, but we’ll probably have a ring in a couple months, depending on his current job situation (im completely debt-free, and he’s very close- we want to pay cash) We already have plans and the month picked to be wed, are about to start renovating a house his family inherited (can I mention how excited I am to start a marriage without a mortgage/lease?), but we’re not technically engaged. This is annoying. It’s no one’s fault. we’ve made the commitment and we’re very excited. we just want to wait to tell everyone about our plans until there’s a ring on my finger. anyone else in the gray area?
Post # 3
I felt this way while waiting for Fiance to have the money for the ring(he wanted to pay cash for it). We had talked about when/how we wanted to get married. Started looking at houses and saving for it. We didnt tell anyone because we wanted to wait for the ring
Post # 4
I like to take gray and wear it. 🙂 We both wanted to be homeowners one day, so I bought a house. No ring, marriage wasn’t part of the purchase. If the relationship ended I’d still have a beautiful home, not a bad “thanks for playing prize.” I got questions left and right about whether or not it meant we were getting married. In the end, his name isn’t on the mortgage. If I bought a car no one would ask if he’s planning on putting a ring on it.
When things got serious and he started looking for rings, he included me in the process and we told my family that we’d be getting married in the next year because, well, that’s what is going to happen. They are still waiting with me for it to become official. But no one doubts that’s where it is going.
I can respect waiting till things are in place and it’s absolutely official. I think it depends on the relationship and the people involved. Our families know both of us are pretty backwards in the way we approach things but know it always works for the best. They trust us, which is all I can ask for. 🙂
Congrats on the house! That’s like a once in a lifetime opportunity!
Post # 5
I’m right there with you. We had the choice to move or get engaged and we chose to move.
Post # 6
@Wonderful: Right there with you! I like to think that we are unofficially engaged.. we went ring looking in the begining of the year and have already pretty much decided what type of wedding we want to have. We don’t plan to get married until 2013, we want to buy a home first. I feel engaged but he says we’ll be engaged when he proposes with a ring.
Post # 7
i think “unofficially engaged” suits us quite well. we are pretty open about being (not so distant) future spouses. he loves when people assume he’s my husband, and loves being called a fiance. bless him. and yeah. it has a lot to do with the people involved. i have super typical mountain bible belt people for a family, and if we were like, “oh. we’re getting married next year. that’s why we’re ripping up the ugly carpet in this old house.” they’d be really confused about how he hadn’t proposed, and how i didn’t have a ring. i think a lot of it has to do with my boyfriend, too. he’s really into all this. he wants a big fancy engagement ordeal, and has brought up how he can’t wait to have an engagement party. i wouldn’t be completely surprised if he ended up with an account on here…. haha. his friends kind of tease him sometimes, because he appears really gruff, but he’s a huge romantic, and wants to follow the typical romantic script. when it was my birthday, the joke was that he was building a birthday yacht with his bare hands.
he’s that guy.