(Closed) No response from family on our trip blog

posted 6 years ago in Elopement
Post # 3
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Aww I’m so sorry! It is hard when you go out of the way to do something creative and involve them, yet no one seems to notice.

I might say something in passing like “I’m so glad I made our weddingmoon into a blog, so that we can always look back and revisit those cherished memories (or something slightly less cheesy!). That way you can at least see how they respond; who knows, maybe they saw it but forgot to reply (we are all so busy these days), or it went to their spam filter. Try not to assume the worst!

Worst case scenario, they saw the link and ignored it. If that is the case, be glad you went the elopment route and spent your wedding day with those who genuinely mattered – you and your husband!

Post # 5
Member
2840 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

By any chance we they hurt about not being involved?

Post # 6
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Why don’t you just pick up the phone and call them?

Post # 7
Member
5958 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@sienna76:  I just wonder if they feel a little excluded and disinterested in the blog since you elected to elope?  And, if I think about it, I would have no idea what to say about it….like if I said, “I wish I was there!” That could sound like I was pissed about NOT being there….I would be concerned about saying something that came out wrong or was misinterpreted, because that can happen so easily.

Give them a ring on Thursday, wish them a happy turkey day and ask if they had a chance to check it out.

Post # 9
Member
2840 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@sienna76:  I am so, so sorry. They have been unloving and I can see why you are feeling unloved. Just remember that’s not true. You are very loved! I’m sure they do love you but it doesn’t look like they know how to love you well.  When I called to tell my real mom (lived with her until I was 14) that I was engaged she immediately said “don’t worry about inviting me.” It kind of hurt. But I know it’s a reflection of her brokenness and not on who I am.  I know she loves me, she just doesn’t know how to love me (or anyone else) very well.  In other words, it’s not you, it’s them. Seriously.  Knowing what you shared, I’m so glad that you and your Darling Husband eloped and enjoyed your weddingmoon without the weight of difficult family on top of it.

Post # 11
Member
307 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@sienna76:  

@howtobeawife:  

It’s so unfortunate… I’ve struggled with this type of behavior from my mom throughout my life too. Fiance tells me never to call her when I’m excited or have good news bc she’ll just bring everything down…he is very supportive. So are my friends who know what my family is like. I rarely get replies to anything… to emails or texts and often not even phone calls. We’re not on bad terms they just somehow don’t know or care that it’s rude and hurtful. I’m having to learn to just check in with her once in a long while and try not to talk about my life. This is why I moved far away long ago.

I’m sorry you’re also dealing with these feelings. Even when expected it’s always a little shocking when we have another vision of how family should act in our minds.

Post # 12
Member
2840 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@waitingwonderland:  

@sienna76:  

Keep me in your thoughts and prayers, ladies. Darling Husband and I are traveling to see mommy dearest this weekend. It will be the first time they meet… oy vey. Also, we may run into the rest of her side of the family. Also hard to deal with people. So, yeah. Oy vey.

Post # 14
Member
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@KatyElle:  I’m with you…

Soapbox: I stopped using facebook because of the “I posted this, why didn’t you respond?” model of communication that people seem to favor over actually having conversations these days.  If my friends/family want me to know something, then I pretty much force them to call or text me.  IMO, sending a link and expecting a response is not the way to share your weddingmoon with your family.

Post # 16
Member
2840 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@sienna76:  Thank you! And remember, it’s not you, it’s them! Don’t let anyone put it on you! And I hope in time you can forgive and find healing from this wound.

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