- 6 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
It seems like there have been a lot of posts lately about bridesmaids being fired and bridesmaids quitting and for the last couple of months I’ve been fearing that I’d be suffering the same fate. Today it happened, I fired a bridesmaid and lost a long time friend. I guess I just need to vent about the situation.
My fiancé has been trying to get me to end the friendship with her ever since he first met her. She’s was rude to him and unsupportive of us from the beginning of our relationship (out of jealousy that it happened so quickly for us and she wished she were the one getting married). The first words out of her mouth when I showed her my ring were “Oh…That’s not at all what I want, I’d return that if someone gave it to me. I just want a round solitaire stone in white gold, but that’s pretty for you.” I let it go because she was dealing with a rough break up and I knew she was jealous. We’d been really close friends since 1st grade though, so it was pretty hurtful. Then she got really upset when I chose someone else as my Maid/Matron of Honor, but what did she really expect when she reacted that way?
She ended up apologizing a couple of months later and admitted that she was really jealous and wanted to get married so bad and felt it was unfair that we’d just met and were already planning a wedding. So things were better for a while, she met a new guy and within 2 weeks was talking engagement and weddings. Then it got worse again. She started stealing my wedding ideas. She wanted to use the same colors, bridesmaid dresses, location, wedding dress style, shoe color, dishes, silverware, vintage style…Basically everything but the theme. And then tried to pass them all off as her original ideas. All while she wasn’t even engaged. She even tried to argue with me over the month, she decided that she wanted to do a June wedding, when she already knew my date was in June. Our date changed from June 2, 2012, to June 15, 2013, but originally we were still planning on the first weekend, which she knew and she tried to argue with me over it because she didn’t want to wait longer.
She just got engaged a few nights ago but started planning her wedding immediately after I started in March 2011 and stealing my ideas. Every time I mentioned something to her, it would all of a sudden be in her plans too. So I stopped telling her details. I didn’t talk to her a lot over the last few months because of some issues going on with my fiancé’s family and I’ve been really busy and stressed (which she knew). Then she flipped out on me while I was on vacation last month and I hadn’t heard from her since. She apparently applied for a new job and put me down as a reference without telling me anything about it. So I was at an amusement park with my 6 year old nice and brother and his gf when I got a garbled up voicemail from some lady that I couldn’t even understand what it was for. The serive was so bad and eating my phone battery like crazy. Next thing I know I’m getting a crazy phone call from her flipping out that I need to call this lady back and give her a reference. I told her my battery was dying, I had almost no service, I was on my way to the bathroom with a 6 year old, and I was waiting for a phone call from my fiancé, and that I’d call her when I had a chance to charge my battery and had better service. She hung up on me and I hadn’t heard from her since. The next morning she posted “Thanks to all my TRUE friends who referenced me and got me my new job.”
Yesterday was my 30th birthday and I never heard from her at all. He texted her last night and asked her if she forgot it was my birthday and that she was some friend not to even call. She replied this morning and said that she rememembered, she just didn’t feel the need to make a phone call for me when I couldn’t be bothered to make one for her. I was pissed, so I texted her that it was really selfish to not even say anything and still be holding a grudge over something so stupid when she hadn’t even bothered to give me a heads up that she used me as a reference and then got pissed off at me for being on vacation and I missed the call. She basically said “F you I’ve been done with this friendship since you told me you weren’t going to call back for the reccommendation so enjoy your life and stay the f out of mine” I actually never said I wasn’t going to call for her, I just couldn’t when she wanted me to and by the following morning, she’d already gotten the job, so…yeah. There was more crazy texts after that, but I think I’ve heard the last from her now.
This ended up a whole lot longer than I expected, I guess I really did need to vent. Whew! My brother’s girlfriend is my new bridesmaid and I’m confident the whole planning process will be much less stressful with her.