(Closed) So I’m pretty much done with my family..

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
286 posts
Helper bee

Sorry you are going through this but I think it is best that you talk to your mom about how you are feelings…Since you have a good relationship with her I am sure the talk will go well…

Post # 4
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Hello!

I would just go ahead and plan yourself without your family.  I’m sorry that they aren’t really involved but sometimes that happens.  My family wasn’t really involved in the planning either.  Try talking to them about how you feel and see how it goes.  Do his parents live close?  Could they help you out with planning?  Last resort, all of us on here would love to hear about your planning!

Post # 5
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Dont feel bad, i am going through the same thing.  My sister got married a few months ago and my mom was all about it! Now im planning my wedding and i get no interest whatsoever from anybody! Not even my sister, which i was helping her alot with her bridal shower and offered alot to help with her wedding.  We cant all have that picture perfect family we see in movies.  It stinks but we have to deal and accept it.  Just keep reminding yourself that its about you and FH and its your day! I wish my family would be excited for me too but everyone is stressed about their own daily life problems so I understand that.  I just learned how to accept it, it hurts but oh well

Post # 6
Member
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I went through that too, nobody was really interested in it except me.  When I’d try to get people involved it seemed really forced, it was hard.  Keep your head up, but be sure to ask for help if you feeling really overwhelmed, I’m sure if they knew that, they’d be more than happy to step in and help.

Post # 8
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee

I don’t know anyone who gets the optimal amount of interest from families in their wedding – either they don’t seem to really care, or they’re too involved and telling you what to do. my mom had a simple wedding too and she just doesn’t see the need for all this planning. so just enjoy the autonomy of making all the big choices by yourself 🙂 

Post # 9
Member
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I would just go ahead and start getting busy! Don’t wait any longer as venues, photographers and the the like must be booked in advance! I had the same situation where everyone seemed so excited when we announced the wedding date and then I was left to do everything myself. Luckily, I had the bees during the last few months to bounce ideas off of and ask advice. Perhaps they will get more excited one you start getting everything in place. If not, too bad for them and be proud that the beautiful wedding you will have will be of your own design!

Post # 10
Member
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

maybe they are not excited because that is their way of not supporting the marriage? do they even like your Fiance to begin with? or do they brush it off and take this whole thing as a joke because you are a person of little follow through?

In my opinion, if the both of the both of them are like this, there has to be a reasonl.

Post # 11
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Don’t stress it to much. My parents and myself/FI were really invovled in my brother’s wedding last spring.  Now that mine is in 90 days they are just starting to ask questions about the details and what they can help with.  I overheard my mom telling the dress alterations lady yesterday that she hasn’t worried about this wedding much because she knew that I would have a plan and dive right in and it would all be taken care of.  And you know what she’s right!  I am a very much take charge/planner type person. I know what I like and don’t like.  So unlike my brother and SIL I don’t need the help that they did.  I had already taken care of the basics as you said above so my parents didn’t stress out like they did with their wedding.

What I’m getting at is, it’s not that they don’t care about your wedding or your Fiance… it is simply you got it together and they know it.  When you get closer I think you’ll see more help that’s what is happening with me.  I didn’t get their help until this week.

Post # 12
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2010

So starnge but somehow these stories are exactly like mine!  You all made me feel like I am going through something typical.  THANK YOU!

Post # 13
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2010

FH’s family has been similar in the not-helping thing. They don’t disapprove of the marriage, just the wedding itself (because we aren’t inviting kids). It is such a sucky feeling and I hope things have gotten better for you in the past couple weeks!

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