The first family member that my boyfriend met was my brother; my brother and I actually live together, so James met Peter on the same night that he met me. (We were set up by a friend of mine, who invited him to come hang out with several people at my place; she thought he would be perfect for me, but I was skeptical, hehe.) The next day, James took me out to lunch at a deli near my place, and so I invited him in to my apartment for a bit. I re-introduced him to my brother, and I think Peter was just thinking, “who is this guy and why does he keep showing up here?” However, James continued to come over for get-togethers, and just to watch movies and whatever, and unlike all of my past boyfriends, James really made an effort to get to know my brother, and so they are friends now. =]
Of my parents, my boyfriend met my mom first, and she was very impressed by him. She liked that he is conversational, and she said that he is very good-looking. Although, my mom is the type of person that sees the best in everyone, especially somebody that I’ve deemed good enough to date (even though my taste in guys was a bit dubious in early high school, haha). The real test would be my dad, for whom no one is ever good enough for his baby girl.
James met my dad (and also my sister) when my whole family decided to go see a play that my brother was starring in. At this point, James and I had been dating for about 4 months. We all went out to a pub afterwards, and I purposely sat James across from my dad. They ended up totally bonding over the fact that both of them work in trading! My dad also asked about James’ family and education, and I think was very impressed with his ambitions and the fact that he respects and places a big emphasis on family. At the end of the night, my dad shook James’ hand and said, “It was delightful to meet you.” My jaw dropped, because he has NEVER been so approving toward anyone that I’ve dated before!
Now my boyfriend is originally from Hong Kong, so even though he and I live in the same city, his family is overseas.
I met his dad when he came to Chicago for a business trip. The three of us went out to dinner, and I was so nervous that I was shaking the whole time! However, I guess his dad approved of me, and said that I was pretty.
Then, when James got his master’s degree, his whole family (dad, mom, and older brother) came from HK to attend the graduation. I went with them, and got to meet them. At this point, James and I had been dating for 9 months. His mom does not speak very much English, so our communication was limited, but she was pleasant toward me, and I think she liked me. His brother was pretty cool, and we got to chat for awhile, so I think he got more of a taste of my “fun” side.
Then the night after his graduation, my family hosted James’ family at my parents’ house for dinner. Everyone got along, and James reported that his parents said that I have a nice family, and they were also glad that I was well-educated and well-traveled. But of course they would prefer if I was Chinese. Ah well, I’m not, so they just have to deal with it, lol.
But that’s how ALL the parent meetings went, in case you were curious. My bf and I have been dating for about 21 months now, but are not getting engaged soon. James spends a lot of time around my family, so he knows that they interact well and have great dynamics (he has now also met one set of grandparents, as well), but I haven’t seen his family in a year, and have not met any of his extended family. One thing that he wants to figure out before getting engaged is if his family will be accepting of me, and if I can be as comfortable around his family as he is around mine. However, we’re hoping that we will get the chance to travel to HK together sometime soon, in order to remedy that.
I think if your bf is a nice and respectful person, then meeting your dad should go pretty smoothly! Even if your dad is a bit of a relationship “downer,” don’t let that scare you~ my dad was too, but things went well, and my dad still says how much he likes James. Plus, if your family is supportive, then they will appreciate the good qualities that you see in your guy! If you are dating someone that is responsible, independent, and driven, that really speaks for itself. So hopefully my good experiences will help calm some of your fears. Good luck with the meeting!