(Closed) SO is writing a letter to his parents, telling him he’s marrying me.

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’ve been following your posts.  I am glad he is doing this and taking a stand with them.  

Post # 4
Member
3624 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@misskarianne:   Same! Woo hoo! When is he giving it to them?

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

And what happens if they don’t do it? Is he going to cut off his parents, or allow your son to be treated like a piece of dirt under their shoe??

Post # 6
Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@MrsSl82be:  she said at the very end of her post that if they treat her son badly they are done with them

Post # 7
Member
9674 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

thanks for the update! i am so glad your Fiance wrote that letter, i hope now they will treat you and your son better and see how great you are for him, and how much he loves you 🙂

Post # 8
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Good luck, I hope they are understanding and can learn to love your son!

Post # 9
Member
2095 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

As much as I would love to say everything will be ok. Nothing is going to change their attitude and if anything you will earn their undying hatred for being the harlot that stole their son. Please be aware that this is the most likely outcome of this situation.

Post # 10
Member
2559 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

As skeptical as I’ve been in your past posts, I really hope for the best and that your future in-laws come around 🙂 If they don’t, here’s hoping your SO can stick it to em for good.

Post # 11
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@misskarianne:  not sure how I missed that sentence!

OP, I would be a million percent sure he really will go through with cutting his family off before he gives them that letter. Saying and doing are two totally different things, and given the track record of your relationhip and what you’ve posted here, I would be pretty surprised with him doing a 180 and wanting to ditch his family

Post # 12
Member
2606 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

His dad believes marriage ruined his life?  I bet his mom is thrilled to hear that.

Post # 13
Member
3798 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

wow. They are tougher than I originally thought.

Good luck…cant wait to hear your update. They should be happy that he met someone that has been by his side through cancer, but some people view life differently I suppose.

Post # 14
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 1999

@Mrs. Harmony:  Definately don’t count him out for having a child of his own in a few years. I worked in Oncology for 4 years (I am a nurse) and I can tell you we saw a number of babies that were born to people we gave rounds and rounds of chemo to, some even had radiation. They say the younger you are when you are treated the more likely you are to become fertile again in the future.

As far as the letter, I think that it will not get the result you are looking for. They will see it as something you pressured him to do. I think a more mature thing to do would be to have this conversation to their face,not in a run away letter. Either way it is definately a good thing that he is ready to move forward with you.

 

Post # 16
Member
5295 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

@ieatunicorns:  I agree. I think a fully grown mature man can have that conversation with his parents face to face.

In my experience, most people don’t make that drastic of a turnaround in such a short time. They might for a little while, and then they revert.  Either way, his parents aren’t going to change. So the only option will be a complete cutting of all ties with them. And I am doubtful of this guy being willing to do so. But only time will tell.

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