(Closed) So nervous about telling people we’re pregnant

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
1220 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

We didn’t tell my IL for that exact same reason.  Unless your IL have a direct say in your insurance for some reaason I’d keep it from them until 12 or 13 weeks if that’s what your gut is saying.

Post # 4
Member
43 posts
Newbee

we waited over two weeks between telling my parents and telling his. talk to you hubs and explain to him that you’d prefer to wait and that you’re only telling your parents for X reason. actually i didn’t plan to tell my parents that early but then started spotting and freaked out a little and needed to talk to my mommy.

after we told his parents (on the phone – they’re in CA), my hubs sent an email just reiterating that its early and that we really don’t want them to tell anyone yet and that we want to wait until April when his extended family will be in the area. so far, so good. my parents only told my bro and SIL, which pissed me off at first, but they’ve been able to keep it to themselves as well (my SIL was outed on FB by someone early on in pg and my brother remembers and is still pissed about that).

and seriously, telling people or not telling people won’t cause/prevent an MC. my doctor said to tell anyone during 1st trimester that you’d share the pain of an MC with. and clearly, that would include our parents.

Post # 5
Member
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

I wouldnt tell his parents until youre in the safe zone – 12-13 weeks. Why would you? I have no plans of telling anyone we are trying and definitely not going to tell any of my ILs until I am past 12 wks because my Mother-In-Law cant keep her mouth shut!

Post # 7
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

If you really don’t want people to know early I wouldn’t tell your ILs until you’re ready for everyone to know. We’re having the first grandbaby on both sides and were really excited to tell our parents and did so at about 8 weeks, but way before we had told anyone else. Within an hour of getting off the phone with my Mother-In-Law I had a comment on facebook from DH’s aunt congratulating us. I understand they were excited but they didn’t even wait a day to tell people let alone the few weeks we asked them to. Luckily I did some damage control and was able to keep things off facebook until I had spoken to my employers and other people I didn’t want finding out that way but it made something that was supposed to be exciting more stressful than it should have been.

Post # 8
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I dont know about this one.. I can understand not wanting your friends to know about it, but i think the immediate family on both sides should know about it. but thats just my opinion

Post # 9
Member
1220 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

In terms of Facebook:  there is a way to not let anyone post on your wall.  It’s under privacy controls.  I highly rec turning off the ability for others to post on your wall until you’re ready.  

Post # 11
Member
4313 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@firsttimemom: I had to do that for the few people who knew we were eloping so that they would not prematurely congratulate us and my parents be like “WTF?????” lol. 

Anyways – congratulations to you and your hubby!  Personally though I’ve never been pregnant, I would wait til the magical 12 weeks and try not to stress about it until then 🙂

Post # 13
Member
4313 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@firsttimemom: Yes.  My husband and my family all live in Michigan.  We’re in Texas, and a few people from work knew when we were leaving to go to New Orleans (we eloped there).  So, to prevent anyone finding out early accidentally by someone congratulating me on FB, I prevented people from posting to my wall.  I have no way of knowing if anyone actually tried posting to my wall during that time though.

Post # 14
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

If you think his parents won’t respect your wishes to keep things quiet, don’t tell them.  I wouldn’t want people to know before I was ready to tell them. 

Post # 15
Member
1493 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I agree with texasmeredith on keeping it quiet if you have inlaws with loose lips. I would tell my parents long before I would tell my inlaws. My Mother-In-Law has a way of telling everyone our business without much thought of our privacy. If you don’t trust your inlaws to keep it quiet until the FB announcement, wait until that time to tell them first, then FB announcement it.

Post # 16
Member
1944 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I am in the same situation as far as Mother-In-Law goes. Mine and yours could be twins! But in all honesty, it will be very hard for us to keep it in from our immeditate family. We’ve been trying for over a year and have infertility issues and honestly I use to feel the same as others, as to why do people announce early but now fully understand. It is an exciting time and I would want support from my loved ones if something should happen. That is WHY we will annouce early and there are no rules regarding this and do not let anyone make you feel different or bad if you want to annouce early. For myself, when we do tell Darling Husband parents, I will have a talk with his Mom about how important and special it will be for us to tell people on our own and in our own time. I will not want his 7 aunts and uncles and some 30 cousins nor the small town we live in knowing right away and that out of respect for us, please keep it in. I beleive she will respect this and will understand and yes, I will be blocking my FB too just in case.

FWIW, if you are feeling uneasy and not sure your Mother-In-Law can respect this if you talk to her about it then I would wait.

The topic ‘So nervous about telling people we’re pregnant’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors