(Closed) So now I've plucked up the courage…when should I ask??

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
1845 posts
Buzzing bee

Ehaughian:  The big question is if you have the ring yet (assuming you have decided to propose with a ring). In order to get her size in the ring it could take a few weeks, even up to or just over a month (especially at this time of year). So you will need to take that into consideration when you decide when you want to do it. 

Also, which do you want more: for it to be a complete surprise (in which case do it after the new year) or to make a big event of it (then do it during the holidays, her birthday week etc.)


Congratulations on making this step 🙂 You have a very lucky soon to be Fiance.

Post # 3
12101 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Ehaughian:  since you are excited about what you planned and don’t want to wait, I say do it in a few weeks. It sounds lovely. No matter when you ask, I’m sure she’ll be thrilled:-) congratulations! 

Post # 4
592 posts
Busy bee

Well if I was your girlfriend, I would want you to propose As soon as possible. But that’s just me. Hahaha. 

Post # 5
127 posts
Blushing bee

Do you plan on having a longer or shorter engagement? If shorter, the sooner the better probably.

Post # 6
2838 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I say the sooner the better. Trust me, she’ll enjoy all of her festivities with a ring on her finger more than waiting for it during them!

Post # 7
86 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

I’m a dissenting voice. I warned my fiancé against proposing on my birthday or Christmas! I wanted to milk the enjoyment and not have something cliche.

That being said, if you’re excited, I’m sure she will be thrilled no matter what.

Post # 8
2109 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I agree with others. I would want you to do it sooner rather than later. It will be very special regardless of how or what you have going on around it. Congrats on your soon to be engagement!

Post # 9
2487 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Definitely as part of her 30th! Why wait?

Post # 10
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Do it sooner! Don’t make her wait. I am hoping my SO pops the Q before all the holiday excitement begins so I can share in all the fun with friends and family throughout the upcoming weeks!

Post # 11
1754 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Ill take the other side too – wait until just AFTER all of these celebrations! She’ll be so amazed by all the awesome stuff that the last thing she’ll expect is a proposal at the end. 

Post # 12
5892 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Ehaughian:  I’d want you to do it before my (surprise) 30th b-day party (not at the party). That way I could have a separate, stand-alone proposal. AND I could show off the ring at my party. 

Post # 13
31 posts

I agree with a couple of previous posters – do it before everything so that she can celebrate and be excited with all the friends and family that you guys are going to see. 

Good luck and congrats! 

Post # 14
303 posts
Helper bee

I would do it before the celebrations, so she can show all of her friends and family. However, having been engaged only 2 1/2 months, I would say it may be hard to start planning the wedding, buy gifts for the holidays, and everything else after… Although, you may want a longer engagement…. Perhaps Spring/ Fall 2016? If that is the case and money is not as tight, I suggest right before everything so she can show her family and friends.

Post # 15
5165 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2014

Ehaughian:  I would do it before all of the festivities. That way she can share that excitement with everyone during the birthday party and holidays. 

I think it also depends partly on how much she is anticipating it. If she really wants to get engaged and is expecting it soon, it may be disappointing to her to go through her birthday and holidays without a proposal. 

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