(Closed) SO putting limits on my shopping

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 47
1460 posts
Bumble bee

Very controlling. He’s not your husband, he doesn’t support you so I don’t see how he gets a say. It should be a discussion, your spending habits where you two make suggestions on how things will be once you’re married but until then, he doesn’t really get a say? Do you live together? I guess that might make a difference in my advice.

I’m a shopper and not even a thrifty one. If I were spending his money, he could limit me all he wanted. But with my own, *facepalm*

Post # 48
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I think your SO is controlling. 

That being said, I think if it has come down to this, he probably feels you have a shopping addiction.  I think if you are constantly ordering stuff online and spending time to return 90% of it, that is a lot of time spent on shopping.  It doesn’t matter if you aren’t spending a lot on each item, or the fact that you have more money than the month before, you still may very well have a problem.  Just because you are able to save some money, doesn’t mean there isn’t an issue there.  I would take a long hard look at your spending habits, and think about whether they are in line with your plans for the future as a couple. 

Post # 49
3460 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Any chance he said this because he wants you to start saving money for a wedding without telling you that he wants you do to that?

Post # 50
9099 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

This just sounds wrong. It is your money. Not his (yet) You aren’t going into debt. You aren’t spending every penny you earn. What’s the problem. That sounds totally controlling. It’s not like he has gently suggested you slow down on the spending but DEMANDING to see what you have bought. What the actual fuck. If that was mean I would tell him he can’t control me,  I will buy what I want with my money, and if he doesn’t like it, sling his hook. X

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