- 5 years ago
- Wedding: March 2013
When I was a little girl, ever since the first time I saw pictures of my mother in her gorgeous lace wedding dress with long lace sleeves, I knew my wedding dress would be some variation of it, a lace dress with lace sleeves. And it is. I ordered this beautiful ballgown lace dress a couple of months ago and have a 3/4 sleeve off shoulder lace overlay added to it. I was crazy about this dress and couldn’t wait to get it. Until….
I learned yesterday that my fiance’s aunt, who’s renewing her vows tomorrow, about 5 months before our wedding, has a very similar dress to mine. Same ballgown shape, with 3/4 lace sleeves also, but it’s a jacket/ bolero as opposed to my off shoulder overlay. Am I a terrible person for feeling really, really sad about this? I know I’m supposed to be happy for her and her husband and their 26-year marriage – in fact, I was and still am. And she didn’t order her lace ballgown dress with lace jacket to compete with mine – she has no idea what my dress looks like. But I can’t help but feel really sad about this. I know lace is the trend right now, and 3/4 lace jackets/ boleros are everywhere, but because our wedding is much later than hers, I don’t want people from my fiance’s side of the family to think that I copied her dress, or that I have the taste of a 50-year old, etc. (my fiance told me that his relatives like to gossip and talk sh!t a lot). If our wedding happens before hers, I wouldn’t feel as bad about it.
I won’t be able to tell you exactly how similar her dress is to mine until the vow renewal tomorrow, but right now I can’t sleep thinking about it. What’s worse is that I can’t tell my fiance about this, because if I do, then he will have a pretty good idea of what my wedding dress will look like, and I don’t want that. But he knows that something is bothering me and kept asking me today if I was ok. I told him that something’s in my mind, and I want to tell him but I really can’t. That made him even more worried. 🙁
My future mother in law who was shown pictures of the aunt’s (her sister in law) dress told me that I have nothing to worry about because my dress looks so much better, has much better quality, has better fabric, looks a lot more expensive, and has a lot more lace details than the aunt’s. I know that this is the truth because the aunt’s budget was really, really low, so she wouldn’t been able to able to afford a dress with the same quality as mine.
But still, I can’t stop thinking and worrying about this. It’s so sad, because now I don’t feel quite as excited about my dress as before.
So my fellow Bees, I could really use some comforting words right now.. How would you feel if you were in my shoes?