(Closed) So, speaking of child-free weddings….

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
6734 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

You don’t bring your kids to a club.

So, why would you bring kids to a wedding that serves alcohol and has a DJ and a dance floor for adults and stays “open” later than most kids’ bed time?

I JUST DONT GET IT!  Why do people think it’s appropriate to have kids at a wedding??? 

I personally think it’s Endangering the Welfare of a Child to bring them to a wedding where there will be alcohol and drunk people!  Ok, not really, I’m exaggerating, but still.  I don’t know why it’s considered appropriate.

Although, I think it’s perfectly ok if there’s a hotel room involved with a babysitter or two watching the kids there.  Or a separate play area. 

Post # 18
74 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

It shouldnt be taken as an insult… Just as there’sadult language, time, and date nights there are certain events/ situations that aren’t appropriate for children.  Although kids can definitely attend a wedding, it should up to the couple to decide the feel and vibe they want for their weddin. (amongst other factors that are a benefit to not having kids attend).  I mean if parents even need time away from their own kids what makes people think that a couple is out of line for not wanting kids at a celebration of their marriage. Now i think thAt if guests are coming in from out of town and need to bring their children. A babysitter should be provided/recommended. 

I personally CAN’T WAIT until more restaurants are adult only or have age restrictions.  There are plenty “kid-friendly” options but not enough escapes for couples who don’t enjoy crying babies or toddlers throwing tantrums and the parents who refuse tMarty and have them settle down or take them outside. 

Post # 19
95 posts
Worker bee

I think a couple should be free to decide whether to have children or not at their wedding and not provide childcare, but then they can’t complain if some parents decide not to show up. 

I went to a lot of weddings when I was a child. My parents worked (and still do) every day all day, and my siblings and I spent every day with the nanny. I think my parents wouldn’t have looked at a child free wedding as a way to get some free time, but more as an inconvenience: not spending a precious day with their chidren AND having to pay for a babysitter (on top of 5days a week nanny that they already paid). They would have definitely skipped the wedding.

This is why I think you can do what you want but respect what other people decide, too.

Post # 20
4369 posts
Honey bee

@Vidya:  I just checked out the STFU website, it is hilarious!

Post # 22
999 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

On one of the comments on FB that one that says ….”oh well there goes their gift too”….if they don’t like it, don’t show up to wedding. Simple as that.

Post # 24
2873 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

id never heard of that website before, i love it!

those posts are ridiculous!

Post # 26
3470 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

I had kids at my wedding– in fact, I REQUESTED kids at my wedding! But I think these parents are off their rockers!  

Just because you have kids doesn’t mean everyone else wants to “enjoy” them with you.  Do these same people pitch a fit when a restaurant/bar doesn’t allow children after a certain time (a common practice in my town)??? No, because there are some places/events that are not intended for children and some weddings fit that category.  

If you are invited to an adult-only event and can’t make it because you have a young child and can’t or don’t want to get a sitter that’s fine– decline the invitation, and you can even explain why you’re declining, but don’t bad mouth the host because of the choice you made. 

And just a side note for hosts– if you have an adults-only event– you also don’t have the right to be pissed at guests who decline because of their children.  Again, you set the rules and they’re following them; you can’t get mad at them for following your wishes (regardless of their motives). 

Post # 27
2966 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

This is hilarious but I don’t agree with it haha. 

I do have to say though that my FH and I briefly discussed the whole “kids or no kids” situation and he just said “no kids” without even thinking about it.  I agree with him  but I do feel bad about the families that do have children, especially ones that I am close to – both on my FH’s side and mine. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings…

And than there’s the issue of age limit..is it 16 and under that are not allowed? Is it 18? or should we abide the law and make it 21 and under?

I think the couple is entitled to their own opinions because after all, it is their wedding.  

Post # 28
571 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

This post is hilarious!! I am having a no kids wedding as well. And I completely agree with the post above about how you wouldn’t bring your kids to a bar/pub.  Also the list that SamanthaLovesJames wrote makes me cringe just thinking about any of those happening.


Post # 29
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Funny!   We loved having kids at our wedding. It was definitely family friendly.

 Other than immediate family or a best friend I would rsvp no to a kid free wedding.  Not because I think my kids are too amazing to be excluded but because it’s not worth it.  Babysitters are expensive.  If I’m going to spend upwards of $100 on a babysitter it’s going to be for a real date. Not going to waste it on rubbery chicken in a crowded Banquet hall. We always leave when the dancing starts kids or no kids. 

Post # 30
3351 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I just need to mention how much I love STFU, Parents. SO FUNNY.

Post # 31
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My Fiance and I decided of a no kids wedding…..

I think the opinions of some are actually discriminating those with no kids…. Why should I provide babysitting or other forms of entertainment for YOUR kids.  The don’t RSVP.  This is our day.  A day that has been planned for at least a year, with time and investments.  My family in particualr only has 3 kids, my Fiance ‘s has more.  But my theory is it depends on the theme of your wedding as well.  We are having a party, lively atmosphere.  We are young, we want to have fun and yes we no kids as well.  So why can’t we have our day the way we want it.  I am only inviting people that I want to be there to share and celebrate our day for us… Not for the “gift, or no gift”.  Those comments are insulting.  I want my guests to have fun and enjoy the night with their date.  And babysitter????  Do you not have other friends with children that will watch them for a few hours??? I do not feel it is the responsiblity of the bride and groom to accomodate to that extent.  The invites are addressed by name only not # of guests they are bringing.  If you feel discriminated against because of no kids, that I shouldn’t have invited you in the first place….


Sorry just my opinion

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