- 7 years ago
- Wedding: November 2011
I am ot really sure where to begin. The issue I need help with is deciding whether I can save my marriage or ask for a divorce. Our marriage reallyis great. Heis my soul mate. He used to feel like my best friend. I love his little girl. He is good to my kids. What’s the problem you ask? His ex-wife and mother of his child. She terminated her parental rights but kept visitation within reason. She has always been offered visitation and would flake out or show up for a couple and then disappear for months on end. The child developed severe seperation anxiety. Drugs are a huge issue with the mother. She was informed of our relationship, came arund twice, and disappeared for 9 months. Or so I thought. 8 days after our wedding, we had our only major fight. He had invited er to his work (40 minutes away),andshe showed up when she could not travel two minutes to see “her” daughter. She has made our married life hell. I do not trust my husband. He has tried to keep their communications hidden from me. He gives in to her demands, and has told me if she hadn’t cheated, he wouldn’t have divorced her. Her presence in our lives causes me great anxiety and I have developed and anxiety disorder from all of this. I have three children of my own to think ofThoughts of her occupy my mind and wreak havoc in my daily life. Every time he lies to me about her (which is the only thing he lies to me about), I tell him, “Next time I am done. I won’t live like this.” But I haven’t left yet. The straw that is breaking me is when she took him to court trying to claim he had kidnapped their daughter. She wanted to appear as though she wanted custody back. He acted like he was enraged. He said she wasn’t getting anything from him, and we hired a lawyer. He gave her visitations and didn’t fight for “M” (the child). I am so disappointed with him. She gets him behind a closed door and he caves. She showed up for her first visit with a warrant outfor her arrest! I have tried to talk to him about this and how I feel but it honestly seems as though I come second to her. Oh, she has also flat out told him she misses him and wants things back to the way the were. I am overly sensitive? Should I start the proceedings to prtoect myself?I love him and have since high school. But I am so tired of feeling like I am losing.