Post # 1
Member
1277 posts
Bumble bee
Yes this is a Pet related post….Bees I am at my wit’s end with my husband regarding our puppy. A little history, my husband is the oldest his parents had only 2 children, him and his sister, they spoil them rotten, do for them constantly, they have never had to want for anything, they are both married and still get what they want, this has lead them to become very selfish, in particular my husband.
We adopted our puppy at the end of June, it was a joint decision, I didn’t force him to adopt him, he wanted a puppy too. Well the majority of the care and feeding does fall on me, mind you I work and commute about 1.5 to 2 hrs each day to and from work, but this is not what bothers me the most…..today my DH decided that he wanted to go buy ET after work, mind you the poor puppy has been home alone all day since 5:45 AM, that means that he was left at home for almost 10 hours without being taken out to go to the potty outside….and this is not the first time he does this, this is like the 3rd time!!!! I canno’t stand it, I totally wanted to reach through the phone and beat him senseless.
I have mentioned hiring a dog walker or taking the puppy to daycare, but he’s always nixed that idea saying that it’s not needed, we can’t afford it, well guess what bees I am going to do it anyways, I just got a raise and I am going to use it for the puppy. He wanted to get a new fridge with the extra money, well he can buy his own damn fridge for all I care at this point.
Bees I know I may sound a little irrational, okay a lot, but what can I do?
Any suggestions? Have you had a similar scenario and what did you do?
If nothing else bees thanks for letting me vent.
Post # 3
Member
772 posts
Busy bee
You obviously have disagreements on what you think is necessary for a puppy (though why he thinks the dog can go ten hours is insane). Is there a way to recognize that you spend more time caring for the puppy, and he should spend more time cleaning or doing something else?
Post # 4
Member
198 posts
Blushing bee
You’re right, it’s not ok for a puppy (or any dog, really) to go 10 hours without a bathroom break. I think you are right in using the raise money to hire a dog walker for your pup. You both agreed to get a dog and if your husband is upset about the dog walker v. fridge then it sucks but you’ll have to stand firm, the puppy’s welfare is the priority. Good luck, it sounds like a really frustrating situation. And I don’t think you are overreacting at all.
Post # 5
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
@mija22:
Ugh, that sounds like a very annoying situation. Poor thing, that is way too long without a potty break. The dog could wind up having a bladder infection, if he doesn’t have an accident first.
Have you considered indoor puppy pads, or a doggy turf? They sell this one at Sears for $79:
http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_SPM6171175008P?sid=IDx20110310x00001i&srccode=cii_184425893&cpncode=31-39661988-2
I am considering this too because we are getting a pug after the new year and i just know he is not going to be good about poopie duty….
Post # 6
Member
1975 posts
Buzzing bee
we have a small pup too, we have a doggy door so he can go out to potty as he pleases is that possible?
we also have puppy pads for just incases (like if its raining)
Post # 7
Member
1277 posts
Bumble bee
Thanks fellow bees, we haed a long discussion last night and we are going to get a dog walker for those days that hubby has to run errands after work and/or I am working late….
We have tried the puppy pads and those didn’t work I even bought this through amazon and all he does is sit in it and bite at the box and dig in the grass….as for doggy door cannot get that due to expense and the fact that the neighbor dogs fight with him through the fence and since we’re not home to monitor don’t know how and if it would escalate further-
http://www.amazon.com/Doggielawn-Disposable-Potty-Real-Grass/dp/B00761ZXQW/ref=sr_1_6?ie=UTF8&qid=1349895009&sr=8-6&keywords=puppy+grass
Post # 8
Member
1277 posts
Bumble bee
Thanks Bees for your help….at least I was able to vent out my frustration if nothing else….Hubby has also agreed to run errands during his lunch as well.
Post # 9
Member
2861 posts
Sugar bee
I’d hire the dog walker and be done with it. We’ve never had an argument over dog duties, but we do fight about things to be done around the house. If he won’t help me then I hire help, period. Oh and it comes out of HIS budgeted money too. Mama don’t play, haha.
Post # 10
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
We have an emergency dog walker on call as well. Our dog is alone for 8 hours and is alright with it, but she’s a small dog who really doesn’t mind (and she’s potty trained for those long times). But if you have a puppy, you need to have routine. A dog walker will certainly help.
Post # 11
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
Oh my goodness! I cannot stand to hear that this is happening. If he cannot think past himself for a bit to think of a helpless little creature, that’s pretty bad. A marriage is a mutual committment of responsibilites. If he agreed to get the puppy, it is as as much his responsibility as it is yours. I know it may not be as easy as we all think to just put him in his place and tell him to start doing his part, but — put him in his place!
Post # 12
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
@mija22: Why don’t you ask him to sit for 10 hours without a potty break! Ha. I agree OP, hire someone to come let the puppy out during the day. :- )
Post # 13
Member
1889 posts
Buzzing bee
I don’t think you’re being irrational at all. You just need to flat-out tell him that either he takes the dog out more often (tell him specifically how often too), or you’re hiring a dog-walker/doggie day care. Simple as that. Some men seem to think that “marriage”=full-time help. Not when wifey works too!
I had to do something similar with chores recently, DH and I both work 40+ hours/week and have pretty long commutes and I simply can’t do all the house work plus take care of the dogs (not to mention I have allergies and get sick when I vacuum/dust). I said either he vacuums/dusts/cleans bathrooms on the regular or we’re getting a maid. I let about a month or two go by and didn’t see him doing these things so I just told him the other day, I’m getting us a maid. He couldn’t argue with me at that point.
Post # 14
Member
47 posts
Newbee
I can’t believe no one has brought up the fact that a puppy needs more than just being let out to pee! Ten hours alone for a puppy is really bad, as you are aware. Puppies need so much stimulation, companionship, training and attention, just like human babies.
Getting someone to walk it is a start, but then what? It’s left on its own again to entertain itself for more hours. This is why people end up with destructive adult dogs.
With regards to the puppy not peeing on the pad/grass thing, you have to teach them what to do. There are countless articles and how to’s on the internet that explain how to do this.
Time alone should be short at first and very gradually increased, and even then, no more than around six hours without breaking it up with coming home to let it out/have a quick play.
I know this isn’t convenient, but that’s not the dogs fault. You are obviously angry this happened, which is good because hopefully that means it won’t happen again.
Post # 15
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
I know I’m going to be ribbed for this but if you knew the pup was going to be left for that length of time then I’m sorry but you shouldn’t have adopted him, surely that’s not a crazy viewpoint here?? More to the point, I’m quite shocked that he was adopted out considering the circumstances.
Post # 16
Member
47 posts
Newbee
@SweetChick: That’s what i really wanted to say.