- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2016
It feels like you’re unconsciously just using this as another reason to be resentful towards him.
Maybe you never really got over him breaking up with you twice and telling you that he still loved someone else?
Maybe this is your way of him proving something to you?
Maybe this is your way of recovering some morsel of your self-worth?
But let me tell you, no matter how big of a rock he gets you, it won’t resolve your issues. If it’s not this thing, then it’ll be something else.
It is absolutely not up to you to decide what he can afford. You are completely out of line by saying that.
You sound completely ungrateful and materialistic.
Sure, he /could/ afford to get her a $6-7k diamond ring, just like he /could/ afford to get her a $6-7k commercial-grade espresso machine, or a $6-7k UTV, or a $6-7k custom hot tub, or….
My Fiance didn’t have a coupon but he did get a nice deal (about $2500 off bc he knows someone that works at the jewelry store) and I’m so glad he got a deal (or coupon). why would I want him to spend so much when he get get it for a good deal! The amount of money he spends does not measure how much he loves or cares about you. get that out of your head. i do think it’s a little immature for you to think that. bc if that’s the case all the celebrity that have 10+ carat rings must be well loved… But why are a lot of them getting divorced? And also, it IS a gift and symbol of his love and commitment to you, no $ should be put on it.
and you shouldn’t put how much your bf makes on here, seems to me you’re just trying to brag… Or to some people, make him look bad…
I think he needs to dump you for saying the poopy comment…. And you need to grow up… Joke or not, that is SO NOT appropriate… You’re only having his baby bc you want a nice rock on your finger?
Also, you mentioned that you’ve never asked him to buy expensive things for you before. Have you not considered that this is why he’s with you? That he thought you guys were on the same page when it comes to materialistic belongings?
When someone isn’t accustomed to showing their affection through gifts, you can’t expect them to be able to suddenly change. It’s just not in their nature. But you can try to get them to understand, if you communicate maturely without becoming resentful, accusatory, or overly emotional.
And as I and many other posters have said, you can always offer to pitch in.
Regarding this: I will be wearing the ring as I clean the poop of his babies. I want to at least be able to look at my ring and go, “okay, at least I have a nice rock.” haha. Most of my friends didn’t wear their engagement rings for years while changing poopy diapers, because–you know–poop. And risk of scratching the baby. You sound a long way away from being ready for the selfless requirements of parenthood.
I think it’s more important to find a loving, loyal, genuine, kind individual who loves you with all of his heart and would do anything for you and wants to spend his life with you and vice versa than that “perfect ring.” When you know you’ve find the right person, any ring will do – period. Don’t place importance on the size or cost of your rock – there are more important things than a big, expensive ring on your finger. Are you sure he is the one for you considering how you feel and how you’ve already broken up twice before?
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Also my ring is from a mall store, and it’s not horrible quality, thank you very much. Some are, and I will say they do mark up prices across the board. But you can find nice rings there too.
You can argue with people on here all you want but at the end of this thread you will still be in the exact same place: wanting a ring your SO can’t afford and doesn’t want to buy.
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If when my husband and I were starting out, our combined income was around $110,000 I would be pissed off no end if he spent $15,000 on a ring. Unless we were 100% debt free that would seem like a reckless thing to do. Put it off the credit card/ student loans/ mortgage, that is love- that is security for the future. I think $1000 is NOT CHEAP anyway.
This thread has run its course. I’m closing it for review.
The topic ‘So upset that BF doesn't want to get me a nice engagement ring’ is closed to new replies.