(Closed) SO visited the parents…

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
4524 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@Shamus11:  That is a really tough situation :-/  I’m glad that your mom did the right thing and said she was sorry, but I understand that those hurt feelings don’t just immediately go away.

I’m NOT one of the Bees that wants my mom involved in alot of wedding or pre-wedding details, but I would like my BFs mom involved, so I’m trying to imagine how i’d react if she and I had this interaction.  I can imagine I’d be leery of taking her dress shopping too, but if she was sincerely sorry I would hope she would use it as an oppertunity to show me she approves and loves the WHITE dress I selected.

I guess all you can do is hope for the best. The vibe I get is she meant her apology. Maybe, before y’all go, you could say something to her about how special and important this moment is to you and how happy you are to be sharing it with her. Kind of giving her a hint to be supportive 🙂

Post # 5
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

You can track my posts and see all the havoc my relationship has caused with my parents. My mom wasn’t as nice about it as your mom was. I was told I’m going to hell and everything else. I was called in front of the church to repent and eventually stopped going to church because I was tired of being talked about every Sunday. She was/is worried about what people think of me, a black woman, dating him, a hispanic mixed man with tattoos. She says tattoos are pure evil. 

It’s been over 2 years and we still don’t get along. She’s tried taking my kids away, kept my kids from me for weeks, and everything else under the sun. I got married last week and had to cancel my honeymoon because my mom left me a threatening vocemail saying the cops were loking for me because she reported me for stealing the kids from school. The drama strained my relationship terribly because my mom made me choose between her or him. We broke up several times because it was hard to deal with. My now husband isn’t allowed at her house or place of business. He tried calling to apologize a few weeks ago in hopes it would mend things, but mom fussed him out and hung up on him. She recently caused a ripple between my brothers and I. My middle brother refused to come to my wedding because of it.

I commend your mom because she is trying. I believe she is sincere and really wants the best for you. You are blessed to not have to go through the turmoil I’ve been, and still, going through. I would’ve love to have my mom there to pick out my dress and to watch me walk down the isle. It hurts terribly bad, but holding on to the pain only makes you hurt worse. You are preparing for the best day of your life, don’t let words over shadow your moment. If it will make you feel better, talk to her and let her know how her words affected you and move on.

And for the record, I have 2 kids and I still wore a white dress!!! It’s what I wanted and I don’t feel bad about it LOL

Post # 7
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Shamus11:  I hope my story helped. It could always be worse! Don’t dwell on the negative too long. You are preparing to marry the man of your dreams! Put all of your energy into finding new ways to love him even more. Smile when you don’t have to, laugh when it’s not necessary and don’t let ANYONE get under your skin again! This is YOUR moment to shine, enjoy it because the moment comes and goes in a blink of an eye! Congrats!!!

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