(Closed) So what are the things that you wish someone had told you…

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

1. Not to buy too many maternity clothes in the beginning because by the third trimester everything will fit differently but you will feel wasteful buying more clothes that late in the game. 

2. Even if you don’t workout regularly, which I didn’t because of extreme dizziness, do some type of yoga or regular stretching routine. I didn’t do this and I really regret it in the third trimester when my legs and back became super stiff and my core muscles are really struggling w the weight shift of my huge belly.

3. Do your research on baby products before you register/ start buying. Figure out which things are worth splurging on (for me it was the reclining glider and car seat) and which things you can get as hand me downs or from consignment shops. My friends picked a lot of their stuff by color alone and regret that now as they got items that are difficult to use or feel cheap. 

I’m sure I’ll think of others but my brain is pretty mushy at 38 weeks:)

Post # 4
Member
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Few more things I thought of:

  • All those books and everyone you know are full of advice, talk to your Dr and decide what items are really important and don’t let the rest freak you out. For instance the whole sleeping on your back thing, You will know if you are compressing that vein and you will move and everything will be fine. So sleep in whatever position is comfortable for you bc by the end you will uncomfortable in every position and desperately longing for good sleep. 
  • Enjoy going out with just your hubby in the last few weeks. You will be tired and cranky and uncomfortable but it will be your last days of just the two of you. Those times are precious, make time for them. 
  • Don’t be surprised if you argue a lot with your hubby during the early stages of pregnancy. I blame this on the fact that men are visual and even though they know you are pregnant they can’t see tangible evidence of it yet and they just can’t grasp how you are feeling during the first trimester. My husband complained about being bored and us not doing anything or going out because all I wanted to do was sleep. He just didn’t get it. Now in my third trimester he can see the physical aspect of it and he waits on me and tells me to rest while he takes care of the house. Several of my friends had the same experiences. 

Hopefully I’ll have some labor advice soon!! Anyone else? 

Post # 5
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2008

  • 9 months is a LONG time when you are pregnant!
  • It (can) take a long time until you LOOK pregnant although you feel pregnant right off the bat!
  • Ditto on the maternity clothes point – I liked buying some early to be comfortable but some of them just don’t fit right anymore.  (the whole “buy your normal pre pregnancy size thing” is BS by the time you hit the last couple months).  Take your friends up on offers to borrow maternity clothes!
  • Talk to your peditrician before the baby comes – we met with ours last night and she was full of helpful information, and the baby isn’t even here yet!
  • People are going to give you lots of advice, find a graceful way to deal with it 🙂
  • Prenatal yoga is awesome – if its done well, it focuses on a lot of things you need to do for your pregnant body (ab strength, back pain, hip openers, even kegels!) and allows you to be in a room full of other pregnant women you  can learn from
  • You don’t need to buy everything in advance – we have a giant convertible baby seat taking up room and we don’t need it for a year, a local Boyfriend or Best Friend store recommended NOT buying a pump until you know your own milk situation, etc.  Keep it simple!!!
  • You stop being able to sleep well once the every 2 hour peeing thing kicks in third trimester, so get those last few good long sleeps in during your second trimester!!!

Post # 6
Member
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

  • Do your reading and make informed decisions about what type of labor you want, whether or not you want to breastfeed, co-sleeping, disposable vs. cloth diapers etc. Once you make those decisions don’t let others make you feel guilty about them. These are hot topics for women and some women will condemn you for not doing it the way that they think is best. 
  • Be informed about your labor options and find a doctor that is on the same page that you are. If its important for you to not be induced then make sure you have an ob/gyn that doesn’t induce for convenience. Believe me in your 3rd trimester when you are miserable and emotional you will be easily persuaded and you might regret it. The same thing for natural childbirth..If its important to to go natural then make sure your ob/gyn understands and won’t offer you pain meds. 
  • All of that being said, prepare yourself for the idea that you may not get what you want. Several of my friends are still upset that they ended up with c-sections but their babies are healthy and thats what really matters at the end of it all.

Post # 7
Member
1080 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

great topic idea! I will be watching this one closely. Thank you to all sharing advice bees!

Post # 8
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I wish someone would have told me about the recovery process. Both of my best friends (who had their first children before me) had c-sections (one planned, one emergency), so while they did have recovery periods, it was different from mine. For example, I didn’t know that it would be painful to even stand up at first, or that even sitting down would be a chore and something I would hate those first few weeks.

Also, I had no idea that after getting an epidural, you’re not allowed to eat. My own fault perhaps for not looking it up (I was hoping not to get one, but was open to the idea), but I hadn’t eaten since 7 that morning, and I would have asked to eat something beforehand had I known. I didn’t get food until nearly midnight.

I also wish that I had known someone in real life who could have told me that it’s okay to not immediately bond with your baby. I was mostly in shock over what had just happened and was still taking it in when she was born. My thoughts were more along the lines of ‘that just came out of me?!’ than anything else. I felt horrible about it for a while before coming to terms that it was perfectly normal. The bonding process has certainly gotten better since then.

Post # 9
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

This post from a former bee on her blog was really honest about what to expect after the baby is born.  Warning, it is pretty scary!!!  

Although I’m not preggo, it’s good to read a real recount of the days and weeks after having a baby so I’ll know what to expect in the future.

Post # 10
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

@QueenBecca037: Thank you for posting that. I went through a lot of that, and it would have been helpful to have read this prior to giving birth. So many sites give the basics but not the details, and this gave the little bit extra to make the recovery process fully understandable.

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