(Closed) So who’s actually been to an intimate wedding?

posted 11 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
1722 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

So this one probably doesn’t count.  But my Future Brother-In-Law had about 12 people including them but it was more like an elopement with guests instead of a wedding and was planned in less than a month.  They still had a cake, we still put up decorations for them, they had the dress, etc.  But things for them were scaled back because it was so small and the reception was just a cookout at a rental house.  It was still nice though.  But I’ve never been to a more formal wedding with that little people although we’re planning one.  

Post # 4
1524 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

We had about 35-odd people.  We kept most of the traditional elements, but skipped dancing.

Post # 7
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

We had 14 guests. Since I wasn’t a guest, I can’t compare with a big wedding, but I loved that it felt intimate, one of the most precious moments in out lives, shared only with the most important persons in our lives.

My SIL got married with less than 30 guests as well. And it was sweet; I think you can really feel the connection between the two persons when there’s less people, the room is smaller and everything about the setting is intimate..

Post # 8
1524 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

@MadameLady: No recpaps, but I can PM you the link to our photographer’s online gallery if you’d like.

Post # 9
495 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We had 40 guests at our wedding – it was basically like a traditional wedding minus bridal parties and minus a whole lot of dancing.  We did a first dance and parent dances, but it was more like a dinner party with some weddingy touches vs. a full on dance party reception.  The guests seemed to have a good time… no negative comments or anything.  I think the reception is a little shorter this way, but that was ok with us.

If you’re considering doing this – pick a “right sized” venue for your ceremony and reception, and it will feel intimate as opposed to “small.”  Pick a room that your guests can fill, rather than getting a place that’s way too spacious.

Post # 10
2492 posts
Buzzing bee

I’ve been to two that were intimate. The ceremonies were no different from a larger wedding. The first had a cake and punch reception in the groom’s parents’ home. The second was a regular dinner  in the church fellowship room with just a first dance as there was no room for anything else. Both were fairly nice. Also they were the only times I have seen gifts opened at the reception, which is awkward to watch, but that was their choice of “entertainment” outside of mingling.

Post # 11
657 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I kind of hate the phrase “intimate” becoming synonymous with “small.” Some weddings are small but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they were intimate. I think that intimacy has a lot more to do with the feel of the wedding, how much you were included as a guest, what the style of the ceremony was like, how closely you know all the people attending, etc. The structure of the wedding really impacts intimacy…for example, I went to a wedding that was at a campground and everyone stayed at the campground for the weekend. At night, we were up late talking around the campfire and the group communally made meals together. That was intimate.

As a guest, the size of the wedding itself doesn’t impact my experience that much. At any given wedding, I’m only going to know a subset of the people there, and I’ll spend most of my time interacting with these groups of people–so at either size wedding, the number of people I talk to is about the same.

For the bride and groom, having a smaller wedding definitely means that they get to spend more time with the guests and that is awesome. For us, having a small wedding was just never an option…we have a lot of family and we have a lot of friends from different parts of our lives. We hope to spend a lot of time with our families in the week leading up to the wedding to hopefully make up for that. We also are planning to skip a lot of “traditional” wedding events to make the reception more about the whole group and not just us, to hopefully make the wedding really fun for everybody.

Post # 12
5280 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Our wedding will be small, only about 90 or so invited with 45-70ish expected.  Since we are having a brunch wedding it will be more like an intimate soiree with very little dancing. I will definitely post pictures after the wedding.

Post # 13
716 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009 - City Hall

We had 7 guests at our wedding, and it was perfect. 🙂

—the ceremony was on a weekday at 4:30

—we took the guests to a nice restaurant for supper

—we did the cake cutting (yes, we had one, with a 2-tier cake) at our historic home.

—in lieu of a dance, we had coffee/tea with our guests in our living room until 9:30 or 10 pm.


Best day ever!!


You can check the recaps here (might have to click back through a few honeymoon posts to find ’em).


Post # 14
833 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My Uncle & his wife had an intimate wedding, and yes it was small, 25 people.  It was in the basement wine cellar of a restaurant in NYC.  The ceremony was held there right before the reception. Here are some details:

– It started in the evening around 7

– They had a single long table filled with candles and small flower arrangements. 

– They had live music but there was no dancing (no first dance etc).  

–  The food was amazing and the wine was awesome!  There wasn’t an official ‘cocktail’ hour but they did pass around hour’dourves (sp?) and wine as soon as guests started arriving for the ceremony.

–  They had a cake and still did the traditional cake cutting. 

– They didn’t give out any favors.

– They had a guest book to sign. 

–  They didn’t do the garter toss but the Bride made a speech befor giving her sister the bouquet. 

It was great being able to mingle with everyone!  I loved the elegance and romance of their wedding. 

Post # 15
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Has anybody been to a smaller wedding *with* dancing?  We are going to have around 45 people and I totally want there to be crazy, awesome dancing.  Is having dancing at a smaller wedding somehow awkward?

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