- 4 years ago
As I said in the title, I don’t really know what to call this. I guess I am curious about who should be invited to the wedding, Ettiqutee wise.
I had not put any though into this at all, until we got FI’s Mom’s guest list last night. She included a lot of professional contacts (she is a lawyer), a couple of judges, the sheriff, other lawyers, etc. I guess I would describe them as dinner party type guests. Future Mother-In-Law is a networker, and works to maintain image and social status. We don’t have any issues with this, and she is still within her alotment of invites. I expect when we get the list from FFIL’s side it will have simmilar types of guests as my FI’s grandparents on that side are quite well connected in both the church and community here.
My question is really, are people on my side of the family going to be slighted by not being invited. My mom passed away a few years ago, I imagine she would have handled this without a problem, but instead my father and I are putting together the guest list for our family, and we are both a little bit in the dark here. I certainly don’t want to offend anyone, and can’t imagine many would come anyway, we are getting married where we live (FI’s hometown) which is 11+ hours from where I grew up.
My guest list is basically just my family, Siblings, Aunt’s, Uncle’s , Cousins, and cousins kids. Both sides of my family are big but close knit. Other than that I have 1 family that we are friends with, and about 10 college friends and their S/O’s. I hadn’t even considered inviting co-workers, bosses, professional contacts. Nevermind my parents friends, my dad’s colleagues, etc. I don’t however want any one to feel slighted, nor do I want my family to have to answer for me to people I didn’t invite. I also quite frankly couldn’t care less if any on e like that is there. Is this an etiquette mistake? Should I be sending them invites? Wouldn’t that be gift grabby (we are young but I own our home and we don’t really have anything we need anyway)?
If it makes a difference we (Fi and I) will be paying for the wedding ourselves.
Current Invite numbers are something like:<br />My Family: 90<br />Fi’s Mom’s List: 130<br />Fi’s Dad’s list: Waiting but probably ~100<br />Friends: 30
Venue can hold 400, and we can afford to fill it. We also expect quite a few decilnes.
Any thoughts or comments are appreciated.