Post # 1
Just have to take a moment to vent…we’re getting married on Saturday so right now I’m in super stres mode but I still think this is a crappy thing to to do…..
We have a couple we are friends with, they got married almost exactly a month ago. They had a very small, budget friendly wedding, nothing wrong with that. We know they don’t have a ton of money so we tried to help out with doing things for them. I volunteered to take their photos, I arrived early in the morning to their house. The wedding was at 11am on a Friday so Fiance and I had to take off work as well. I took photos during the day and went home had them printed for her and created a nice collage for them……and never got a thank you.
Fast forward to our upcoming wedding. They were one of the first people to RSVP to our wedding. We are getting married in my hometown which is only 30 minutes from where i live now and 45 minutes from where they live. Today, 2 days before our wedding my Fiance gets a text from his friend saying they don’t have enough money to put gas in their car to get there………seriously? In the 8 weeks since you RSVPed you haven’t been able to save like $10. I don’t mean to sound the way I think I’m sounding but it’s really hurtful to me that we went so far out of our way to help them with their wedding and they can’t even show up to ours.
If they were traveling from a long distance I could almost understand but realy it’s a 45 minute ride! Ugh just so frustrating especially since everything has been paid for so theres almost 100+ dollars the drain! And really a text? You can’t even call us!
Thanks for letting me vent bees 🙂
Post # 3
Seriously!? Sounds to me like they can’t afford a gift/money to give you when they get there…maybe you could tell them you would really like them to come, and if its a gift that’s holding them back that you understand…they might as well come celebrate your day instead of you wasting $100! I’m sure it’s not the $15 in gas that’s holding them back :-/
Post # 4
@sarahjane822: that really sucks, and I would probably feel the same way you do. Are they really that hard up for money? because if they are then try to think about how incredibly stressful that must be, and how terrible they probably feel. Maybe they were too embarassed to call? If you think they are just using it as an excuse then I would be pissed. You are friends with them so you are the only one here who knows which case is more likely. Other than that try to not stress too much, yeah it sucks but don’ let it add to the stress of the upcoming wedding!
Post # 5
@Moonbear17: you’re so right…..not worth the stress!
I think it’s a combo of things keeping them away but I honestly just feel it’s a bad excuse to get out of it. I say we’re friends but the truth is we are really friends with the guy more, my Fiance worked with him and he’s a nice guy, his wife is not so much a nice person and I usually try to grin and bear it with her. That’s bad to say I think I’m just upset so I’ll stop now. Moving on, I’ve got wedding plans to get orangaized!
Post # 6
Are you close enough friends that you can just say you’d rather gift them a $20 gas card than waste the $100 on the meal? I mean I guess maybe it’s not just that, maybe they don’t have the clothes to wear either or something…money and friends is always a sticky situation.
But yeah, I’d be annoyed too.
Post # 7
@sarahjane822: exactly! after it’s all over I doubt you are going to look back and even care about it. now you know what kind of behavior you can expect from this couple. when I’m upset with a friend over something my sister always reminds me that people show you who they are all the time, pay attention and realize their limitations. it happened and now it’s in the past. I hope you have an amazing wedding!
Post # 8
I think it’s terrible that they never thanked you for what you did for them but that being said, I would cut them some slack. Ten dollars in gas wouldn’t even get me to work and back for more than two days. Gas is incredibly expensive. When you’re strapped, every single penny counts.It’s not a matter of them not being able to save gas money for your wedding–maybe they need every dollar they have right now. If they don’t have money for gas, I’d be more oncerned if they had money for food, etc., than I would be angry at the fact that they cancelled. You’re going to have people not show up/change their mind, and yes, that’s money wasted for you, but it’s also money you already spent. Weddings are costly and paying for meals for people who don’t come is part of the deal. At least they told you instead of just being a no-show. As far as texting, he was probably embarassed. you are just a few days away from your wedding–I’d focus my energy elsewhere.
All that said, good luck with everything and try to relax! It’s going to be a bumpy couple of days but I’m sure your wedding will be wonderful (even without them there). Good luck and congrats!