Post # 1
I will be 9 weeks pregnant on Saturday, and it looks like we’ll be breaking the news at the church where my husband is on staff on Sunday because its our only chance to tell people ourselves. Why? Because a woman who found out ( only because she saw me throwing my guts up in the parking lot and asked me) took it upon herself to start telling everyone – after I asked her not to both that day, and two more times AFTER I caught her telling people! I feel like its the only way we’ll get to share our news ourselves to even a few people. I barely know her!!! You suck, lady. Thanks for deflating the excitement of telling people for us… We weren’t even ready and now everyone knows!
Post # 3
Aww, I’m sorry. I hate people that do stuff like that.
Post # 4
@ellebeerob: How unfortunate! That is a really big shame when people have to be selfish like that, and for what? it makes no difference in her life if she tells others or not. And the fact that you asked her 3 times, I cant believe she couldnt just respect your wishes.
I am a firm believer that if a secret is not mine to tell, I keep my lips zipped. Too bad more people couldn’t live by this rule.
So, for you. I guess telling some people on Sunday would be exciting for you and give you the opportunity. Does she know your family? If she doesn’t then at least you can be thankful to be the one to surprise them.
Post # 5
@turkey22: My family doesn’t live here, but she told my husband’s extended family.
Post # 6
@ellebeerob: wtf… ok, sorry. Minor pregnant woman expletive moment haha. I’m so sorry. We’re in a similar position only because it’s getting harder to keep the secret now with my family deciding to tell ‘just one person’ and that person telling ‘just one person’ and so on. It sucks. Big time.
You could still try to keep it on the DL if you’re not ready to share, just a thought. If people ask you guys point blank you could say something like, “When we’re ready to announce it, you will be the first to know.” maybe?
I’m delusional for thinking some people are actually capable to keeping their noses out of other people’s business.
I know how much of a kill-joy that is, though. Right now Darling Husband and I are debating as to whether keeping it a secret will do any good at this point since it’s already spreading. 🙁
Post # 7
@ellebeerob: Awe that sucks! My Future Father-In-Law decided to share the news with everyone about our engagement while we were still on vacation and couldn’t tell anyone ourselves. I was not pleased!
Post # 8
@SimplyChic11: I’m seriously thinking of confronting her on Sunday bc she just had a pretty embarrassing surgery, and asking her how she’d like it if I started telling everybody about it? It might knock some sense into her!
Post # 9
@drummerbride: pregnancies, engagements, kinda the same. I had people texting me within the hour of being engaged simply because a friend I told put it on FB and tagged me in the announcement. Gotta love it. This time I disabled anyone from being able to post on my wall except me.
@ellebeerob: I don’t know her personally but I would call her out on it. Especially since you’re not ready to announce it yourselves. IMO, it’s never ok to say anyone’s engaged or pregnant unless they’ve been extremely open about it themselves, via facebook or some other form of outing.
I honestly don’t know what I would do in your shoes. :/ I totally understand not being ready to tell though, I’m nearly six weeks and still feel like I haven’t come to terms with being pregnant myself. I want to slip into that joy naturally when we hear baby’s heartbeat, etc and not have the added pressure of people being overjoyed when I am less than thrilled (probably due to extremely bad morning sickness lately!). Best of luck whatever you decide to do. Just cause she’s a blabber mouth doesn’t mean you >have< to make an announcement until you’re ready. I feel people will understand if you wait a few more weeks.
Post # 10
Wow. Some people are so rude. I would definitely confront her about it. And congrats on the baby!
Post # 11
@ellebeerob: I really think you should do that. People don’t understand politeness. You don’t need to announce it to the rest of the church. If people come to you to ask you, just frown and tell them to go confirm with the person that gave them the news.
Post # 12
@ellebeerob: So sorry to hear that. How horrid of her to steal that from you! After all the side effects of pregnancy getting to tell people and see their surprise is one great thing.
So sorry 🙁
Post # 13
@ellebeerob: I would be livid. I would pull her aside and tell her how hurt and embarassed you are! She stole your happiness to tell other people. I’m mean enough I would go behind her and tell other people what she did. Please don’t be afraid to kindly but tactifully confront her.
Post # 14
@ellebeerob: I’d be livid. It is not her place to spread you & your DH’s good news. I would probably let her have it!
Congratulations though & I’m sorry she is ruining your surprise.
Post # 15
Telling her exactly how sad this makes you is, I think, a good idea. She’s probably just convinced herself that happy news needs spreading. Not to mention, it’s an extremely private thing for many people and they may not want to announce until quite later in case something terrible happens.
Oh, evil thought, I know…but you could consider pulling her aside and telling her there is a problem with the pregnancy and now, thanks to her telling a bunch of people, you have to explain that to everyone who is asking about the baby. After she absorbs that you could tell her the baby is, in fact, fine, but that you hope she realizes what an invasion of your privacy it was for her to share your news with people after you’d asked her not to because that is what would happen if something bad did come up. It might shock her into realizing how inappropriate her actions were and how hurtful they have been…and how much worse it could be.
Post # 16
you need to front her about this. discuss with her, her actios and how they have hurt you. Dont necessarily say you are rude, but focuss on her actions. assk her why she did it. People might not even know. Tell her how it made you feel. breathe and allow her time to answer the questions.