(Closed) Someone you’re NOT looking forward to telling at Xmas?

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Wow! Sorry you’ve such a crappy experience with her, she sounds insane!

I am not looking forward to telling my father, for various reasons. Mainly he never has anything nice to say about anything or anyone. It can be hard not to take it personally even though I know he does it to everyone.

I fully intend to wuss out and have my mom break the news to him. Congrats on your pregnancy, don’t let idiots get you down!

Post # 4
Member
1750 posts
Buzzing bee

@PandasWifey: Wow your sister sounds like she is a whack job. If she tries to start drama you should leave. This is not a god time for useless stress since you are prego. Actually, its never a good time for useless stress. Can you ignore her to keep the peace?

Post # 6
Member
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@PandasWifey: Gosh!  This sounds really awful!  I can’t believe your sister acts that way and actually was hitting you over you standing up for yourself regarding having children in the future.  That really is insane.

I am slightly nervous about telling my mom (I’ll be about 8.5 weeks), but just because we’ve only been married since May and I know she’ll think its too soon.   But nothing like what you are experiencing!  I’m just a little afraid I won’t get the reaction I want. 

I would definitely tell your husband what to expect.  Do you have another alliance in your family that you could tell ahead of time and warn them of your fears?  It might be better if someone else in your family, rather than your husband, was able to step in if she reacts negatively (which it sounds like there is a high likelihood of.

Gosh, I am sorry you have to go through this.  I don’t know if I’d even still maintain a relationship with someone who acted this way!  Gees.

Post # 7
Member
1335 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Kempinski San Lawrenz, Gozo

To be honest…if I was in that situation, I’d not tell her anything until the bumb a very visible and she notices herself. 

 

The last thing you need during this delicate time of your pregnancy is a crazy sister making things difficult for you.

Post # 8
Member
255 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Ugh, I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t look forward to telling her either. Hopefully having the family gathered together and telling them as a group will help deflect some of her negativity, or at least drown it out with everyone else’s excitement. Best of luck and I hope she’s on her best behaviour.

I have an atranged cousin who I haven’t seen since I was a small kid/hasn’t been around for ANY of our family coming to Christmas this year. His gf is expecting and about a month ahead of me. I just wasn’t looking forward to the awkwardness of it all sharing pregnancy notes/excitement with total strangers… but now I’m seeing its not too big a deal at all.

Post # 10
Member
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I agree with everyone else.  Sounds like a crazy situation and I’m so sorry you have to deal with it.  I just wanted to say that with Baby #1 I was scared to tell people because we hadn’t even been married a year AND my husband was unemployed.  We were just gambling that he would have a job before I had the baby (and we would have been ok financially anyway).  With Baby #2, I’m a little scared now as our oldest isn’t quite a year.  I guess I just think people judge, whether they say it to your face or not.  Stupid, I know.  Anyway, I feel a tiny bit of your pain and wish you luck!

Post # 11
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Well, the good news is that you already know that she is batsh** crazy.  So knowing that she’s nuts to begin with, just try not to take anything that she says to heart.  Enjoy your pregnancy, and good luck!  A baby is a blessing no matter what your sister has to say about it. 

Post # 12
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Yes, I’m terrified of how my stepdaughter’s mother will react. When she first found out Darling Husband and I were dating she started crying and screaming that we were going to “steal her baby” then the next weekend presented Darling Husband with papers to have SD’s last name changed (she was 4 at the time) and she’s been pretty out of control ever since. She’s gonna lose it when she finds out.

I feel so bad for you that you can’t physically avoid your sister, I can’t believe she hit you! Maybe if you announce it to the whole room she won’t be able to be super mean about it, and if she is everyone will tell her to shut up. If she hits you when you’re pregnant never go near her ever again, no one will blame you. I hope it goes well for you… you really deserve to be happy right now and it sucks that the people who react badly tend to react SOOOO badly. But I’m confident the negative people will be overshadowed by the happy people πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My advice to you is just not to engage with her.  Tell everyone the news and then when she says something awful just blow her off.  If she says anything just be like ooookay and moce on.  Don’t let her stupid sourpuss attitude bring you down. This is a wonderful time in your life and you deserve to be excited and enjoy it.

Post # 14
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Ugh, can you wait till she’s in the bathroom or something, that way you can at least get the initial good reaction without her craziness mixed in? What was your family’s reaction to her hitting you?! I can’t even imagine!

Post # 15
Member
1317 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

My advice is to announce it when everyone is in the room, that way if she says anything mean, your family will have your back! During the announcement start with saying how you have wonderful news that you’re both very excited about and hope to share the excitement with everyone, and ask if people can please refrain from any negative remarks. She should get the hint!

By The Way, I think she’s crazy. A normal person would never kick someone out for something like that and start to hit them! Yeh, she’s nuts.

Good luck to you and Congratulations!!!

Post # 16
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

That is awful! My advice is to just ignore her – this is wonderful news, just share it with your family as though she is not even part of the equation – if she starts to make a scene she will be the one who looks like an idiot – rise above her nonsense! And congratulations!!

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