(Closed) Something to worry about, or an “engagement freak-out”? (long… sorry)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

This sounds really, really difficult and I’m so sorry that you’re going through it. It’s wonderful that you and your Fiance have talked and he knows how you’re feeling. It’s a testament to your relationship that you’re able to talk about this and work together as a team to come to a solution. Since you’ve done that, the only thing now is follow-through and see how it goes. I know it’s the last thing you want to be thinking about three months from your wedding. Is he the kind of guy that sticks to plans? (I only ask because my Fiance isn’t always Tongue out)

Post # 5
Member
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

In that case I’m guessing it’s going to work really well. Try not to worry too much, hon (I know, easier said than done!).

Post # 6
Member
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Well, it doesn’t sound like he’s got the true “work-a-holic” mentality. It sounds like he’s just shifting his schedule and putting sleep at the top of his priority list. I think it will definitely help for you to get up with him and help him get into work earlier. The earlier he gets into work, the earlier he’ll be able to get his work finished and come home. I think I would be much more worried had you found out that he’s going into work at 7am and not coming home until 8-10pm that night. That to me is more of a work-a-holic rather than going in at 12 and coming home at 8 to put in 8 full hours or a full day of work.

Post # 7
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m sorry you’re having a ‘freak out’.  Its totally normal.  It sounds like you guys have come to a really good common ground, now you both have to work at following through.  He’ll find his way, sometimes it just takes longer for certain people.  No one knows if the resolution they’ve come up with will work, the point of a marriage (to me) is to keep trucking, through all of these obstacles.  I’m sure it will work out.  Good luck to you both. 

Post # 8
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

This sounds health-related to me (both physical and mental—weddings can be stressful/daunting on that front even as they’re exciting, and that’s 100% normal!)—which means yes, definitely address it, but don’t worry, it can be resolved. If he’s just working eight hour days, I wouldn’t even necessarily categorize that as workaholic—he just needs to shift the hours, though he may need support from his doctor to change his diabetes management if that’s the root of the sleep timing.

It sounds like he recognizes the problem and is committed to changing things, which means you’re 99% of the way there already—but I would loop in the professionals at this point, too. His doctor may be able to do something as simple as tweaking his insulin levels to help with the sleeping, and it might be helpful for you both to just talk with a psychologist or counselor, too—most health plans will cover that as part of your normal health insurance. (I know that can be scary if you’ve never seen anyone before, but it’s important to remember that it’s totally, completely normal to feel overwhelmed by or anxious about life changes, and that’s exactly what they’re trained to help you with. Even just going once so that you can hear “yes, you’re feeling just like most people feel, and you don’t need to worry” can help put things at ease.)

Good luck—and definitely no need to worry!

Post # 9
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

Has he gone to a doctor lately?  I ask because sometimes life changes cause stress which disrupts sleep.  A doctor can suggest things like vitamins or possibly medicine to help him get the sleep he needs and get his schedule back on track. 

Talk to him about how you are feeling and ask him how you can help him get back on track. 

Post # 10
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I agree, get him to the doctor, quick! Sleeping a lot is also a symptom of depression. i am worried about your man.

I think you are on the right track with helping him to get up early/eat a good breakfast/exercise, but I want him to see the doctor too, just to make sure he is ok.

You are really sweet to him and he is lucky to have someone so caring!

The topic ‘Something to worry about, or an “engagement freak-out”? (long… sorry)’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors