(Closed) Sometimes being the first one engaged isn’t so great

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2759 posts
Sugar bee

Oy. It sounds to me like you both have some really terrible “friends” and I’m sorry they put you through that. I have only two friends who were engaged/married before us; we’re the first among most of our friends and there’s been nothing but happiness and genuine excitement.

I guess the best you can do is take the high road and be happy for your friends. You’re married and have what I hope is a wonderful life with your husband – that’s what really matters in the long run ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@leebaby711: Hi girlie!! I’ve been looking for photos of your wedding up here!!

I rememebr your posts and how my blood pressue would raise for you!! I’m so glad those 3 bridesmaids left. That is horrible they were jealous enough to screw up your one special day :-/

Wedding planning was a paid in the arse for me too. I cried more times than smiled. My relationship with female family members were altered.

Just concentrate on the fact that planning is all for the wedding day, and that day was perfect of you, just as it was for me. The planning you will forget. The pictures of your perfect day will last forever.

Try to be thankful for the perfect day ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 7
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@leebaby711: So did your parents ever come to the wedding? How didyou find out those 3 wanted to ruin your day? Do they still try to contact you?

I’m a brat and would have posted pix all over FB for them to see….but then again I am kinda vengefulCool

Post # 8
Member
2263 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@leebaby711: I’m with you on this one. I’m the first engaged out of my friends and only my parents/two or three closest ones are happy about it, as well as my professors :/ go figure lol. The only people there for FH are his co-workers and my family. 

 I understand what you mean about happiness never materializing, about people being jealous and petty and trying to ruin your happiness (whatever happiness you CAN have with all the pain and stupidness around you!). It’s sad. ๐Ÿ™ 

 How did you deal with this at the wedding? Just wondering. I want a day that sounds somewhat like yours was…. little drama and something I’ll actually want to remember or look back on in pictures and be happy at least FH and I had a special evening of it. 

Post # 9
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

Weddings can bring out the best and unfortunetly the worst in people.

Ive really figured out who my “true” friends are through this process, and I still have 10 months to go.

Post # 10
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

That is really sad. :/ Not trying to assume you should share my friend philosophy, but why are you guys still “friends” with people that would act/treat you guys like that? It’s none of their business how long you chose to date, and even if they were miffed there is absolutely NO excuse for subsequently trying to ruin a wedding. I’m sorry but that is just bitchy. I wouldn’t associate at all with people like that.

ETA: I agree with Bostongrl25 though that people really show their TRUE colors…meaning I wouldn’t give anyone a pass on that behvior. I’ve had a friendship end during this process because I realized I was being taken advantage of in lots of ways.

Post # 13
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

aw thats so sad..yeap most people cant even stand your happiness…especially when you thought they were your real friends.. you are married; thats all that matters; hope you feeling betterEmbarassed

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