(Closed) Sometimes I just want to elope: a lengthy vent

posted 6 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 3
Member
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I wish I could tell you something that would make it all better. But I can’t change the doubters words. What I can tell you is that 2 years flies by…  Before you know it your time will be here and you will have your wedding planned without the rush. Trust yourself and your Fiance… but don’t worry about the rest…

Post # 5
Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m a decade older than you, having a two year engagement, and still have to deal with snide comments. I think it’s just part of being engaged. 

Post # 7
Member
1246 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Oh, Ive heard this before. Got the “you’re too young” and “no need to rush into things.” That was 22 years ago… 😉 Living well is the best revenge… Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
86 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

i understand somewhat of what you are feeling. i will be 21 when i marry and my Fiance will be 22. our families are good but my Future Mother-In-Law did talk about waiting at first but everyone is different. we explained to her it felt right for us and they are all behind us and even helping financially/ emotionally. just follow your heart and know that it will be okay. if you are worried about what others say, try couples pre-marital counseling so they know you are serious but if not, just have fun and enjoy your engagement!

Post # 10
Member
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I feel for you hunny.

I have set my date (February 2014) and although I want to get married tomorrow, it will take some time to plan and really I don’t think I could forgive myself for not giving both my FH, myself and our families those memories.

As my nanna said to me a while ago: a wedding isn’t just about you.

Which is very true in a way, our families need that too.

My advice to is:

1. Set a date. As soon as I had the date set I physically relaxed. Even if it has to be two years down the track, set it and you’ll feel better.

2. Count down in months and it will go much quicker. I don’t normally advise people to wish their lives away but another trick is saying to yourself as you get closer to the date “The next holiday I will be going on will be my honeymoon” or “This time next year my dress fitting will be happening” and as you get closer “The next christmas I will be married.”

3. Don’t fight your mum. You’ll need her to be the voice of reason…and source of money if she’s helping out. Plus she’s already done this before, I know I’m only worrying about certain parts of my wedding, and she’s reminding me of the little details that I haven’t even thought about that are still really important.

4. Be thankful you have such an amazing FH who is willing to do whatever you want! I am thankful every day for that because I have had guys pressuring me before and being really pushy.

5. Relax and once you start to get into the planning process when your mum comes around enjoy it! You’re only going to get to do this once 😀

Post # 11
Member
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

 sydneybridetobe1991: (reply # 9) —>  THIS

Excellent advice… not much more to add.

Except… enjoy the journey… you won’t be back this way again.  Engagements can be fun too.

  

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