Post # 1
I love him desperately, I do, but some days… like tonight, I just really don’t like him. I can’t be the only one. We just spat sometimes and he doesn’t even realize he gets under my skin about things.
Pet Peeve #1- stopping at Taco Bell to get food with your work partner, but coming home to me not asking if I want anything, knowing I didn’t cook, then eating in front of me with work partner. I’m one of those people that no matter what store or if I go out to eat, I ask him if he wants/needs anything. Can’t seem to extend that courtesy to me.
Pet Peeve #2- recently buying a puppy together shows how different we raise things. If puppy nips while playing, I automatically correct it, while he thinks its funny and pushes it. Wrong. We have 6 neices and nephews ranging from ages 1 year to 10 years. Puppy cannot be ok nipping during playing at any point.
Driving me up a wall #3- Buying my center stone and then letting me know he’s putting off setting it and proposing during a serious conversation the other night due to “bills” which we’re ahead on. This wouldn’t be an issue, but you just spent over $2K on a dog, when just the week prior we had a long talk and agreed that it wasn’t a good idea right now. Me being selfish is thinking that I want a ring prior to a puppy, but there is other reasons behind that. Like, said puppy is going to be 100 pounds and we live in an apartment, or that he’s on nightshift 6 days a week/ 10 hours a day, so guess who’s raising a dog that has never raised a dog before? oh. me.
Gah. Im just in a bad mood tonight. </vent>
Post # 3
@ccantics: Eeek! Have you been open in communication about some of those things, especially if they are reoccurring?
You are not alone, as we all have moments when our partners do things that get under our skin. It just depends on how you deal with it and what you can make out of it.
Post # 4
@Eva Peron: Every time. I’m not shy about things that upset me, specially when it comes to little things. When I brought up the “thanks for asking if I wanted anything…” I got the whole “you knew I was going, you should have said something. I shouldn’t have to ask you.” and then “bleh bleh bleh I don’t think when I’m leaving work.”
I dropped the ring thing. He got the dog he wanted, so he’s happy. And its “hes a puppy, he doesnt know his nipping, hes just trying for his toy” then shows me the blood puppy drew while playing with a smile on his face.
Post # 5
LOL the food thing…that pisses me off. Joe my Fiance did that to me when we first started living together. He went into town to run some errands areound 10 am, left me home studying. at 11:30 he strolls in with one 6 inch sub from subway, and nothing for me. That’s one mistake he only made once.
Post # 6
@ccantics: What kind of puppy did he get for 2 grand? Was that after all the shots and supplies I hope…
I feel ya on raising a puppy, I just got my first dog and did much of the raising staying at home for the first 6 months while my husband finished his schooling. He does a ton with the dog don’t get me wrong and even does dog training on the side but many days spent were just me and the dog. We got a German Shepherd and he did everything with his mouth( aka bite bite bite). My hands and wrist look like I had issues…lol but you are so right about corrections! You have to teach acceptable mouthing asap. Message me if you ever need to talk or vent about puppy raising!
Post # 7
@Eva Peron: Not including shots and all. That was cost of the dog + flying him here. Its a purebred American Bulldog puppy… the type of dog he’s wanted for 9 years now, so knowing it would make him happy (he seriously stalked websites for them like I did engagement rings) I said it was fine the night he finally decided to buy him.
Post # 8
@ccantics: ah okay! Well its time for you to get that ring 😉 Are you able to afford finishing it ( setting etc) any time soon or do you need a lot of time to recuperate financially?
Post # 9
I get this. he leaves his crumbs and coffee spills on the counter eEVERY mORNING! ugh. or his dishes in the sink when the dish washer is right there beside it!! ugh. lol gotta love em
Post # 10
My Fiance puts the empty Brita back in the fridge, the empty ice cube trays back in the freezer and pushes every single button I have…for fun. Drives me batty! I think we all have those pet peeves, but open communication is always key. I am very verbal (verbose even) about when I’m annoyed!
And the food thing, man…if he did that to me…I wouldn’t cook for a week! That’ll teach him a lesson. 🙂
Post # 11
I feel your pain. They can be so annoying sometimes.
The food thing… I would be totally passive-aggressive and do the exact same thing to him until he gets that it is a common courtesy to offer to pick something up for the other person.
Post # 12
I’m sorry. I know it’s sucks to be feeling that way, and I think we all go through times of annoyance. It sounds cheesy, but I always try to remind myself of all of the wonderful things he does for me and that I’m lucky to have him. I’m sure I bug him sometimes, too. 😉
Post # 13
Yep, these things happen and so do bad moods! Good thing you can vent here!! Anytime you spend a significant portion of your time with anyone, they will get on your nerves. But the flaws and annoying things we do also make us unique and who we are. Just know you aren’t alone, lol.
1. Leaving closet doors/lights/cupboards/doors of anykind open/on. Seriously, take the two seconds and shut it! You can’t possibly be that lazy.
2. Why in God’s name do you take 45 minutes to “shower”? What could you possibly be doing that takes that long? I don’t even take that long!!!!
3. How is it that you get the coffee grounds and coffee on every surface in the kitchen? And why don’t you see them and clean them up? This is my EVERY SINGLE MORNING.
$2,000 is a lot to spend on a dog. Seriously? And why did it have to be purebred? There are plenty of shelters that need homes for dogs. I agree with you on this one. It’s a little ridiculous. But good thing you can start with a dog, and maybe come to some sort of agreement on how to raise it before you have kids. So he’s got his dog. Your ring should be priority now.
Anyway, I hope today is better day for you!
Post # 14
I love my SO dearly, but he is ALWAYS late. In fact, every man in his family is this way. As a way to mitigate this issue, I’ve started telling him we need to be there a half hour earlier than we really do – and then we get there on time. So funny.
Post # 15
THANK YOU FOR THIS POST!!! We have a lab/weimeraner mix puppy thats like 5 mos old. The dog pisses everywhere, chews up shit, and T treats it like a baby. Its makes me soo mad because when I lost our baby back in Feb. He acted like it was nothing. One day I put the dog on Craigslist and you would of thought someone told him he was about to loose his life LOL!!
Post # 16
Yep. Mine annoys the shit out of me sometimes. GAHHH. I swear… and I don’t do anything that drives him nuts like he does me. And sometimes it’s deliberate, which just pisses me off majorly. He thinks it’s funny to push buttons and he’s finally gotten better at that after years of learning that when I say to knock it off in a serious tone, I mean it, or there’s going to be one pissed off mama bear.
Wow the dog and financial thing sounds crazy… kinda sounds like you guys have communication issues? It is a big, big red flag that he would make such a big purchase when there is another (your ring) on the line. It’s not that it’s not ok to get the puppy first, but you guys should talk about your entire financial situation and agree on things first. I know you said that you told him it was fine to do it, but obviously you have some resentment going on, which is understanable. It also sucks that he is expecting you to do most the work. Those two things show some issues in boundaries and respect. Nothing that isn’t normal, but I do think it needs to be addressed.
I totally relate to the puppy issue. We just adopted a puppy about 2 months ago and he is all about play, play, play with the teeth! I don’t like to be chewed on, so I correct the puppy when he bites me and/or put a toy between me and the puppy’s mouth at playtime. However, my SO loves to play rough and likes to get puppy all riled up and lets him bite him. I was stressing over this at first, but puppy has learned to differentiate between the “rules” my SO has, and the “rules” I have. I.e., he is rough with him during playtime and not with me, and I don’t let him do it to anyone else, either. Probably took him a few weeks to understand the limits, but it has worked out beautifully. They are smarter and more adaptable than we think. Just like when a kid will run to one parent when the first parent says no, lol.