Post # 1
So my fiancee decides to hand over the wedding responsibilities to me, he said I was in charge of all the money. He gave me all his acct numbers and all the other stuff that comes along with that. He even calls me when he makes a purchase or when he decides to withdraw money. Well, I just found out that he had gotten a decent bonus for agreeing to stay at this company for another year, his paycheck will also be posting within 2 days so I tell him: “Honey, maybe we should just pay off some of the things for the wedding now that we have the money.” My justification was that we might end up using for something else and then struggle to pay off everything before the wedding. His answer: “Not now!” He did not say why or anything else, just “Not now!” I seriously don’t know what to make out of that if apparently I’m the one in charge of “our” money =(
Post # 3
Well if you’re “in charge” of the money, just do it…
But seriously, can’t you just ask him, “why not?”. I mean, even though you’re in charge, you should probably have frank discussions monthly about what the big purchases/payments are, how much is going into savings or coming out of it, etc. Just so you’re both on the same page so there are fewer surprises.
Post # 4
You guys need to be communicating better. Instead of a command: “Not now!”, he needs to communicate his reasoning. Does he think that money should go to another bill? Does he think you guys should earn interest on the money instead of immediately using it to pay bills?
That street goes both ways.
Post # 5
It’s a bit strange to me that he just handed over everything and wants you to handle it. But, if he wants you to manage the money you ghet to manage the money. Personally I would think it would be a lot better if you two handled money like that together. It’s one thing to let you budget and make payments on wedding stuff as you please, but another to make decisions on bonuses, large purchases and other important things like that.
Post # 6
Definitely sounds like a communication issue that could be simply cleared up with an answer to “WHY not now?”… and NOT getting snippy w/ short answer =/
I handle all of our finances but still talk through everything with DH before sitting down and cutting the checks b/c he might need/want something that we haven’t talked about yet and things may need to be adjusted.
Your Fiance may want to do something else with that money and that’s fine… BUT it NEEDS TO BE COMMUNICATED.