(Closed) Sooo upset! please tell me if im wrong?

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
94 posts
Worker bee

Take a deep breath. It WILL all work out. Remember, the wedding is a few hours, and your marriage is forever. That being said, you are a typical American bride who wants it all planned out just so. Most guys, American or not, will take their time, and not understand all the little details. I swear their brains just function differently. Mine just doesn’t get why I am upset that the cake stamps arent out yet. Make yourself a checklist to discuss with your FI- prioritize the things that mean the most to you. You may not get to have everything just so, but maybe if you can at least get him to assure you of two or three details that are very important to you, you will know that you have that to look forward to. Ask him to take pictures, or put you on the phone with vendors if you can.  I am sure things are different there- they are different from state to state here. In the end, it will be wonderful. You are marrying the guy that you love.

Post # 4
Member
2004 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

Maybe you could hire a wedding planner in Finland to help things along? Or get some of his trustworthy family members involved? 

I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time with it. It’s really hard to relinquish control over something as important as a wedding from across a continent. But in the end I am sure it will be fine. Things probably are different over there. I would try to prioritize what things are most important to you and to just trust him with the rest. And in the end, you will be married to the man you love, which is the most important thing.

Post # 7
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

Is there some stuff you can research on the internet?  Is there some stuff you can do from her and ship to him?  Favors?  Invitations? DIY flowers?  Maybe you can come up with the timeline, one item at a time.  Discuss it with him, check in with him.  Then move on to the next iem.  It’s nice that he’s this willing to get involved too.  While he’s not as detailed about it as you, it’s sweet that he’s wanting to do it.

Also, maybe you can rely on the Miami reception as your planning outlet.

Post # 8
Member
126 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

Awww I cannot imagine how you must feel!!  And NO you are not wrong to feel the way you do…..it’s very natural….you’re only upset because you care!  And at least you will get to have a reception in Miami if Finland doesn’t turn out the way you want it to (doubt if you have a trusty Future Mother-In-Law helping you out (I’m very jealous of that by the way…). And although I’m very much like you in terms of wanting to know what’s going on, I know a few girls who would DIE to be in your position….your MAN is planning it and you get to sit back and just BE the bride.  Hope everything goes well!!!  Good luck!!

Post # 9
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I can absolutely appreciate your being frustrated! It is hard to expect the groom to do anything except show up but when you are planning a wedding in another country and the responsibilty falls on him, that can be VERY difficult! Like what others have said, no matter how much you plan, something will go wrong. The best thing to do is plan as much as you can from here and to let the rest go. You can have a reception in Miami when you guys get back. I think that is a great idea! Good luck and let us know how it goes!

 

CONGRATS! 

Post # 10
Member
398 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

Everything will turn out great, you will see!  What guy doesn’t want to impress their lady with the calmness over appearantly stressful situation.  You are lucky to have a guy who is doing all of the planning.  I was impressed with the planning my husband did. 

I say keep you lines of communications open, in a non-stressful manner.  A cute email with how fun are these centerpieces or what shade of pink…etc.  Once he has the ideas there is not much that you can do but sit back and wait!

It will be amazing and then you will get to plan another round in the states 😉

Good Luck!

Post # 12
Member
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

It is good that you have his mother to help, Put your trust in her. Good luck!

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