(Closed) sorry bees, just needed to talk :(

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3520 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Be strong, sweetie. They wouldn’t want you to cancel. If anything, it would help you bond to talk about the wedding details. My Gram just died in October and every day, even though she was out of it, we’d look at pictures of the venue, talk about the meal and flowers… Every time she would recommend the same red roses… I swear, she’s going to be with me on my wedding day, she is there in so many of the details.

Post # 5
Member
6248 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

I’m so sorry, grandparents are awesome and it really sucks when you see them struggling or sick.

What about having a courthouse ceremony or something similar now, while your grandparents are at a semi-okay stage in their diseases? That way they get to share the joy of your marriage and it’s less stressful if (god forbid) they aren’t able to make it to your October wedding. Just a thought.

*hugs* and sending my prayers your way.

Post # 6
Member
282 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

They definitely wouldn’t want you to call it off.  You all will be in my thoughts and prayers.  Many hugs sent your way love!

Post # 7
Member
1297 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Even if they don’t make it to the wedding, they will have been able to see you get engaged and know the person you’ll be spending your life with. I’m sorry that it’s so hard.

Post # 9
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I think it’s really sweet what you’re doing. ๐Ÿ™‚ I had the same exact concerns. Sadly, one of mine came to fruition. My Papa passed away in November, but what helps is knowing how much he loved my Fiance and how happy he was that we were engaged. He was pushing it for years! He also gave me a sixpence a few weeks before he passed away. I’ll be tying it to my bouquet. I think it’s really special that you can talk to them about details and things. Wishing for the best for you all! XO

Post # 10
Member
2273 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I am sorry I just went thru this with my father, he had oesophageal cancer, sad to say he passed last Sept. BUT like PP it was nice that he still did get to see my dress and he knew the details for the wedding. I also know that regardless he will be there on the day with me and I also know it is going to be a very hard day for my immediate family to get thru thou my mum is looking forward to it cos as she says “it is nice to have something good to look forward to after a year of pain”.

Sum it all up cancer sucks major ass!! 

Post # 11
Member
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t know what to say other than I’m sorry. **HUGS**

Post # 12
Member
5984 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@RAWR.its.BREN:  I am so sorry to hear this. Dont cancel your wedding. I am going to share my story and I hope that it does not upset you. The purpose of me sharing this is to let you know that it might be very hard (my situation is pretty extreme) but that everything will be fine.

My grandmother was very ill and actually passed away on the Friday before our wedding (our wedding was on Sunday). It was awful, very, very awful. Some of my family could not attend due to this adn we ended up spending our honeymoon at the funeral and mourning with family ๐Ÿ™

However, I know that my grandma did not want me to cancel because of her. I know that she really tried hard to make it past my wedding so that it would not interfer. She got a very special dedication though. It was difficult to celebrate in that situation.

 I hope that my story does not scare you but I wanted to share to let you know that we still had an amazing wedding day despite it. Be there for your grandmother and spend as much time with her as you can. She would never want you to change or cancel such an important day for her. Hang in there!!!

Post # 13
Member
7694 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

My mom died exactly one month before my daughter’s wedding.  I strongly felt both parents presence at the venue. Honey, no matter what, they will not miss your wedding for anything. 

Post # 14
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Oh, and one of the best things I heard from a fellow bee when realizing my Papa wouldn’t be at my wedding is this little tidbit I’ll pass along. In the unfortunate case that something happens, remember this. They’ll have the best seat in the house on your big day.

Post # 16
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m so sorry for your loss sweetie! I know what you mean though- I had to arrange my wedding around my great grandmother and my worst fear is her not making it for whatever reason. 

My grandfather passed away last week, and I’m heartbroken that he won’t be part of our special day. As sad as I am I would never cancel my wedding- only because my Fiance is my rock, there for me no matter what and I want to start our own lives and family as a married couple- to shine some happiness on the sadness that my family is feeling. I absolutely plan to do something to honor him though- have a song of his played (he co-wrote music with John Denver and played bass for Peter Paul & Mary for 45 years!)- so that his presence is still felt. I also plan to have old family wedding photos around the venue, especially of those not with us as a way to include them in our special day.

I think no matter what happens, you will regret calling off your wedding down the road. Hopefully they will make it to your big day- but if they don’t you should still follow your heart as they would want you to, you know? Imagine down the road when you have grandkids- you would absolutely want them to be happy and have their special day no matter what! ๐Ÿ˜‰ 

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