Post # 1
I am a total wreck right now, I just got news I did not want to hear one bi. My grandma has been battling ovarian cancer for a year now and they did her blood work to see if it was gone, needless to say it didn’t come back well. So they are doing a CAT scan tomorrow. She was doing better I thought, her hair was growing back and she was looking happy again. I am devastated to think she wont be at my wedding, I shouldn’t think that way I know, but her and my grandpa are both very sick. I changed wedding locations so it would be easier on them to make it, I picked somewhere handicap accessible….I’ve considered so much in planning my wedding for them being there. Now I am just scared. I’m just at a loss right now. I honestly can’t imagine getting married without them there. Part of me would really consider calling it off if either of them passed away 🙁
Post # 3
Be strong, sweetie. They wouldn’t want you to cancel. If anything, it would help you bond to talk about the wedding details. My Gram just died in October and every day, even though she was out of it, we’d look at pictures of the venue, talk about the meal and flowers… Every time she would recommend the same red roses… I swear, she’s going to be with me on my wedding day, she is there in so many of the details.
Post # 4
Thanks hun, that honestly really helps. I know they would want me to carry on and be happy on my wedding day no matter what. It’s just hard. I’m lucky to be able to discuss the wedding with her, and I’ve shown her my dress. I just wish I could see her more, I am an hour away and always working! It makes it that much harder on me.
Post # 5
I’m so sorry, grandparents are awesome and it really sucks when you see them struggling or sick.
What about having a courthouse ceremony or something similar now, while your grandparents are at a semi-okay stage in their diseases? That way they get to share the joy of your marriage and it’s less stressful if (god forbid) they aren’t able to make it to your October wedding. Just a thought.
*hugs* and sending my prayers your way.
Post # 6
They definitely wouldn’t want you to call it off. You all will be in my thoughts and prayers. Many hugs sent your way love!
Post # 7
Even if they don’t make it to the wedding, they will have been able to see you get engaged and know the person you’ll be spending your life with. I’m sorry that it’s so hard.
Post # 8
Thanks for all your kind words ladies. It really means a lot. I don’t want to assume something too negative right now, she’s a real fighter! They both are! but if it gets down to it I am planning a courthouse ceremony up in their town. I want them to see me get married. I will do what I have to do!
Post # 9
I think it’s really sweet what you’re doing. 🙂 I had the same exact concerns. Sadly, one of mine came to fruition. My Papa passed away in November, but what helps is knowing how much he loved my Fiance and how happy he was that we were engaged. He was pushing it for years! He also gave me a sixpence a few weeks before he passed away. I’ll be tying it to my bouquet. I think it’s really special that you can talk to them about details and things. Wishing for the best for you all! XO
Post # 10
I am sorry I just went thru this with my father, he had oesophageal cancer, sad to say he passed last Sept. BUT like PP it was nice that he still did get to see my dress and he knew the details for the wedding. I also know that regardless he will be there on the day with me and I also know it is going to be a very hard day for my immediate family to get thru thou my mum is looking forward to it cos as she says “it is nice to have something good to look forward to after a year of pain”.
Sum it all up cancer sucks major ass!!
Post # 11
I don’t know what to say other than I’m sorry. **HUGS**
Post # 12
@RAWR.its.BREN: I am so sorry to hear this. Dont cancel your wedding. I am going to share my story and I hope that it does not upset you. The purpose of me sharing this is to let you know that it might be very hard (my situation is pretty extreme) but that everything will be fine.
My grandmother was very ill and actually passed away on the Friday before our wedding (our wedding was on Sunday). It was awful, very, very awful. Some of my family could not attend due to this adn we ended up spending our honeymoon at the funeral and mourning with family 🙁
However, I know that my grandma did not want me to cancel because of her. I know that she really tried hard to make it past my wedding so that it would not interfer. She got a very special dedication though. It was difficult to celebrate in that situation.
I hope that my story does not scare you but I wanted to share to let you know that we still had an amazing wedding day despite it. Be there for your grandmother and spend as much time with her as you can. She would never want you to change or cancel such an important day for her. Hang in there!!!
Post # 13
My mom died exactly one month before my daughter’s wedding. I strongly felt both parents presence at the venue. Honey, no matter what, they will not miss your wedding for anything.
Post # 14
Oh, and one of the best things I heard from a fellow bee when realizing my Papa wouldn’t be at my wedding is this little tidbit I’ll pass along. In the unfortunate case that something happens, remember this. They’ll have the best seat in the house on your big day.
Post # 15
Oh ladies I can’t tell you how much I appreciate all your kind words.I honestly feel somewhat at peace with this, it’s still lingering in my mind and will still devastate me, but I know I can move on and love my wedding day for both my fiance and I, and my grandma as well.
@daniellealys I am so sorry to hear that happened to you. Did it cross your mind to cancel your wedding? Probably not sense it was so close! I’m glad you still had an amazing day. Thanks for sharing your story with me.
I’ve got a memorial planned out just in case, her name is Sharon rose, after the flower rose of sharon, so I will reserve a seat for her with a single rose of sharon flower on it, (even if it will be a little off season for it! They are late bloomers though!) But as sweet as it sounds, I simply hope it doesn’t come to that.
Like i said my fiance and I discussed that we will be doing the court house wedding if it comes to it and still doing the real thing for everyone else. He’s being so supportive, my grandparents love him, and he really enjoys our trips to see them as well. His grandma died when he was younger and it was hard on him for a long time. So he is being really sweet. I’m a lucky women.
Post # 16
I’m so sorry for your loss sweetie! I know what you mean though- I had to arrange my wedding around my great grandmother and my worst fear is her not making it for whatever reason.
My grandfather passed away last week, and I’m heartbroken that he won’t be part of our special day. As sad as I am I would never cancel my wedding- only because my Fiance is my rock, there for me no matter what and I want to start our own lives and family as a married couple- to shine some happiness on the sadness that my family is feeling. I absolutely plan to do something to honor him though- have a song of his played (he co-wrote music with John Denver and played bass for Peter Paul & Mary for 45 years!)- so that his presence is still felt. I also plan to have old family wedding photos around the venue, especially of those not with us as a way to include them in our special day.
I think no matter what happens, you will regret calling off your wedding down the road. Hopefully they will make it to your big day- but if they don’t you should still follow your heart as they would want you to, you know? Imagine down the road when you have grandkids- you would absolutely want them to be happy and have their special day no matter what! 😉