Post # 1
Ugh. Everything has totally crashed and burned since my happy post two days ago… The last post was about how SO had decided to move forward with the proposal despite all the e-ring drama (ring is totally MIA after being ordered February 10th). As if it hasn’t already been pins-and-needles waiting for this ring, I’ve been stressed out about the fact that we’ll only have 5 1/2 months to plan the wedding. (We’ve been shooting for October 2012– a compromise, since the original date was June 2012, long story).
WELL, guess what happened this afternoon? SO’s BROTHER PROPOSED TO HIS GIRLFRIEND, AND NOW THEY ARE PLANNING A WEDDING FOR OCTOBER 2012.
First off, SO is just as shocked as I am– how do brothers not talk about these things? Second, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGGGGG. I am just so fed up with all of this. Partly because I know the logistics of us now doing an October wedding are totally out the door. But mostly because this entire engagement “process” has been so unbelievably painful for months. And it really really hurts to see it be so easy and fun for someone else.
Honestly, I have no idea what SO and I are going to do now. Bottom line, not get engaged this weekend, as was the plan 🙁
I give up.
Post # 3
But why can’t you get engaged? How does one impact the other?
Post # 4
@Ambergris: I don’t think it is such a big deal when brothers get married around the same time, maybe sisters-depending on the circumstances. I read what you posted about the ring. Maybe that will be in soon and then he can propose soon? I know you wanted 6 months or longer, but we planned our wedding in 4 months. Just sayin’.
Post # 5
I’m confused. How does this affect your engagement plans?
Post # 6
While getting married the same month as a sibling is unfriendly to them/guests, get engaged if you want to! They may change their minds about the Oct date.
Post # 7
Don’t sweat it. You can still get engaged. You probably will need to change your wedding date, but you can see that as a good thing, it gives your more time to plan your wedding!
Post # 8
I would still stick to whatever timeline for engagement you and your SO had, but no reason to rush getting married (based on what I’m reading here), especially if it would cause drama.
Post # 9
@Ambergris: Truthfully, I can see what you mean. It sucks having 2 brothers get engaged basically the same to their girlfriends; one, because it may appear as one trying to out-do the other (or pressure from the GF), and/or two, because you want to get married within the same month (hopefully not same date!). I only say this b/c I got this same frustration with my sister when I was first *maybe* going to get engaged before her (years ago/different guy) and even now because there’s a veeeeeeery slim chance I *may* get pregnant before her down the road. Of course no bad feelings on my end, I “just get it.”
In the end it’s about you and Fiance. As many bees say, and as I’m sure you see, many people get engaged around the same time, the same color scheme, plan the same time of year/even date, etc……as others. You and Fiance just do what’s right for you, and be completely happy about it. Through it all. You and future SIL could probably be able to vent, cry, laugh, etc. together, and help each other through the experience and planning. I still bet each wedding will be unique, beautiful and full of fun and laughter. 🙂 xoxo
Post # 10
I only half jokingly told SO that he’d better propose before his cousin so we can nab fall 2014 lolz… and that’s two years from now!! All his cousins keep getting married, for that side of his family, there is just no free season for like the next year +, it’s crazy.
Post # 11
@jayebaby: We could. Just doesn’t feel special at this moment. And brings to light just how many things have gone wrong in getting to this point.
@creativeplannertobee: Yeah, I hear what you’re saying. The problem is really that SO has family across the country, and I doubt they would want to/financially be able to travel for two weddings close together.
Post # 12
i appreciate you not wanting to crowd your FBIL’s engagement but to be honest i would say to heck with it and keep going with the plan and get your own engagement started.
if you keep waiting for everyone else to have their turn then you are going to miss out on living your life!
Post # 13
Aw, thanks everyone for the replies… ya’ll are right: there is no reason why we can’t still get engaged soon. But are we going to get engaged this weekend? No. And I feel like that is a courtesy I would expect of a sibling.
@MadTownGirl: your post was so thoughtful 🙂 thank you so much.
Post # 14
@Ambergris: 🙂 Happy, <EARLY> Congratulations!! Can’t wait to read your post about when it happens since now we know it’s coming up! 🙂
Post # 15
I’m sorry about what happened, and I hope that this doesn’t delay your proposal too much. 🙂
Post # 16
sortof bad timing but not the end of the world, i hope you get your proposal soon 🙂