- 5 years ago
So my SO has this friend that he met at work a few years back (a part time, seasonal position). She is 15 years older than my SO, holds all of these degrees, a PhD, etc… so when he was finishing his masters she would help him with papers. When I first started dating him, based on his description, she was sort of like a mentor, I guess.
I met her once, several months back, and I found her kind of pompous. She was nice to me, but made a couple of offbeat comments about my age (I am nearly 20 years younger) and she generally struck me as someone who loved to hear herself talk. My SO loves to debate and can talk the paint off of a wall, so it made sense that they were friends. I wasn’t a huge fan but she is his friend and I wasn’t going to make an issue out of nothing.
To be completely honest, she didn’t feel like a threat to me. She is married (but her husband is ALWAYS traveling for work, literally..always), she is very plain, no makeup, long hair that looks like it hasn’t been trimmed since 1995, rough hands (she is very outdoorsy). I am not trying to discriminate against women who enjoy the outdoors and don’t wear my makeup/style their hair – but that is not what I consider my SO’s type. She does have a great body, very fit.
Anyway, my SO meets her out probably about once a month for drinks. It kind of irritates me because I am never invited (he probably assumes I don’t want to go, in his defense) and I would rather it be coffee or lunch, to be honest. She also recently called him for help with repairing a roof, which struck me as odd. Not only is he NOT a handy guy, but she lives a half hour out of my SO’s way and certainly has plenty of other options, male friends, neighbors, family… but she chose him.
I have also heard her make comments (to another woman) once when I was in her presence about how it sucks that she never sees her husband because she is a sex fiend. So that was comforting. :::eyeroll:::
The thing is, I don’t really have a reason to dictate his friendship with this woman. To my knowledge, their relationship has never crossed the line. They were close before he met me. It kind of bothers me that he feels so close to her, I know he has confided in her about things in the past (I have caught glimpses of emails and phone conversations where he is surprisingly open/emotional). He doesn’t “open up” to me nearly as much as he does her. He tells me she is “like a guy.” I don’t know. I think she wants him and he is oblivious to it, but that is complete and utter speculation.
Do any of you have any opinions or thoughts on this? Thanks.
- This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by devi514.