Post # 1
I just realized that I spend a lot of time thinking about how much my SO thinks about us lol So, I spend a lot of time on the Bee, and I look at pics of rings and dresses, and I actively think about timelines and possibilities, etc. Does he think about any of this stuff? He never talks about it, but I wonder if that means it doesn’t cross his mind, or if he just hides it well not to give me false hope. I don’t share that I think about it all the time with him lol So maybe he does the same.
What do you think? Has your SO told you he/she thinks about it? How close in your timeline did your SO start talking about it (e.g., say your timeline for engagement was 6-12 months and he started talking about it with 3ish months left… just a guess lol) Or does your SO talks about it all the time, maybe even more than you’ve thought about it…
Post # 3
my SO likes totalk about when we get married or when we have kids but doesn’t want to propose for a few years (from wht i can gather) fills me with false hope all the time.
Post # 4
My SO glosses over the wedding but apparently thinks about kids, house, etc. It’s kinda funny–it’s like he forgets about that key component. But we’re on the same page now with a nice timeline so I guess he’s been considering it more lately!
I just don’t think men think about it the same way we do. As SO pointed out, weddings are definitely more of a girly affair–he’s not interested in that day so much as what we’ll have after. And that’s fine with me!
Post # 5
@Kat_Kit2000: I’m not sure how much he thinks about it but he never brings it up himself so probably not too much. I on the other hand think about it way too much.
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo
I’ve been assured by BF that he has thought about it… But I doubt that means much more than something like “this girl might be an okay wife” lol. I honestly don’t think that he thinks about anything very much at all XD which is wierd to me because I’m always thinking about something.
He’s definitely not thinking about our future right now because he has two exams next week that he’s super stressed about, so I guess i can forgive him for the moment :3
Post # 7
My SO openly talks about having a house and a family together and even the engagement but not the wedding itself. I think it’s programmed into their heads that a wedding isn’t a manly thing to discuss and the woman is meant to be in charge of that so they avoid it.
Post # 8
MrWigeon is often talking about ‘when we have our house’ and occasionally when we’re married or have kids. I think it’s something that crosses his mind every now and then, but nowhere near the extent that it crosses mine! Most of the time I’m sure he just thinks about food. Honestly… the analogies I used last night/ today concerning getting engaged were all centred around buffets.
Post # 9
@LittleWigeon: haha really? What are some of these delicious analogies? lol
Sometimes he just makes me wonder how much he thinks of me as an individual. Like, outside of sex lol I know that when I shop I constantly find things that I think would fit him or that I know he’d love. Even when I read something or talk to someone he always pops into my head. And that’s outside of me just thinking about him and the kind of man and individual he is. And then there’s the sex stuff too haha
I just think it can’t be a female thing. Guys Must think about this too. Especially when they “appraise” a woman as a potential life partner. Why can’t they just tell us what they’re thinking?!? I tell SO all the time the kind of things I like to hear. Literally spell it out to him (e.g., “I love you so much,” “You look beautiful,” “I love that thing you did” haha). And all he mostly gives me is “it’s fine, good, and okay” lol
Post # 10
My fiance was like that too, always talking about our future together in terms of where we live, houses, kids, etc but never the marriage part. I finally laid it out plain and clear – no marriage, none of that happens, and I won’t wait around forever. He got the message and starting talking about marriage until he was comfortable with it (I gave him plenty of time) and proposed.
Post # 11
My boyfriend and I love to talk about our future together–how cute we think our kids will be, where we want to have our wedding, what pets we will have, stuff like that. Maybe it’s because, even though we’ve been together for so long, we’re still too young to get married anytime soon.
Post # 12
As others have said, my SO rarely talks about engagements, weddings, or getting married, but he talks a lot about plans for our future (house, kids, finances)…all things that won’t happen until after we’re married, so it keeps me hopeful!
It’s actually refreshing to read that most everyone’s SOs are the same way.
Post # 13
I think guys just don’t talk about it. And they probably don’t think about the wedding. My boyfriend doesn’t talk about it at all really. The only reason I know he wants me to someday be his wife is because last year he told me about a conversation he had with his mother where he also said “I’m pretty sure she’s the one I’m going to marry”. Also when he’s drinking and we’ve hung out with his guy-friends he’s asked them to be his groomsmen lol. We always talk about our kids and where we want to live and growing old, but he never talks about the wedding. I agree with something I caught someone else saying up above, he probably thinks more about what happens after and less about a day where he gets dressed up and there are centerpieces.
Me? I’m obsessed with weddings!
Post # 14
@regit45: Definitely! I’m so glad I don’t have the only SO who keeps marital thougths to himself lol So often I hear on the bee how everyone communicates so well and tells each other everything but that can’t be true. People don’t read minds and we also have a filter when we talk (most of us at least lol)
Post # 15
My husband seriously couldn’t care less. This sort of stuff was so beyond his realm of giving a damn.
Post # 16
My SO made a joke awhile ago about how whenever he thinks about me, he pictures my finger without a ring on it. lol. Obviously, he was joking, but he does tell me he thinks about it. He also told me that he was talking to his extended family about marrying me last weekend. He’s mentioned that he fully has is “plan” about how he’s proposing to me
However, I definitely think about it more than he does. FOR SURE! I think that’s just natural for women.
I think when he thinks about it, he thinks about the proposal (how he’s gonna do it), and just marrying me in general. I think about the proposal, flowers, dress, venue, budget, honeymoon, gift registry etc etc…….then I search for everything on pintrest and weddingbee lol