Post # 1
So, this was brought to my attention in another post…so I would like a mass opinion. PLEASE NO ARGUING!!! I will be nice, so please everyone be nice. Let me give my thoughts on spanking and then you bees can give me your thoughts:
In another post I used the term “ass beat”…which is obviously a figure of speech. I don’t believe any kid should be “beat”. But, I’m sorry-if a kid is acting up in public, running around, acting a damn fool and all the parents are doing is saying “Sit down!…Please stop!…Your tablet privelages will be taken away later!” that is ridiculous. I have over 25 nieces, nephews and younger cousins….all of them get spanked. I was spanked growing up. Do I believe that you should tell them WHY they shouldn’t be doing something first? Yes, of course. But when they do not listen to that, you have to discipline them. I will never believe, not even for one second, that giving a kid a smack on the butt is more destructive than letting them run wild and misbehave. Kids need structure and boundaries. There is no one size fits all approach to parenting, but it is a parents responsibility to teach their kids how to act and show them right from wrong. The idea that a 5 year old can be reasoned with like an adult is beyond ridiculous to me and part of the reason why there are so many bratty teens and adults, is because they were allowed to be brats as kids with no repercussions.
Post # 2
No you want kids to behave because they respect you as the authority not because they are scared you will hit them.
Post # 3
Spanking sends a terrible message that hitting is okay, and simply does not work. I don’t know what five year olds you’ve been dealing with, but my three year old responds to reasoning.
Yeah, we all got spanked as kids but that only made me angry and resentful. It didn’t correct my behavior.
Spanking raises the odds of behavioral problems, so good luck with that.
Post # 4
sallyloves90 : My sister and I were not spanked growing up, and we were well behaved children, of course like all children there were times that we were not so well behaved but we didn’t require spankings to get us to stop what we were doing or learn from our “bad behavior”.
If I have children I will 100% not be spanking them, luckily my husband is on the same page.
Post # 5
I mean, you can talk about how spanking is “necessary” until you are blue in the face but the fact just don’t agree with you.
At best spanking is not beneficial as a means of discipline and at worst it is detrimental.
“when they do not listen to that, you have to discipline them”
Spanking is not synonymous with discipline, there are many effective ways to discipline a child that isn’t spanking.
Post # 6
You need to educate yourself on methods of discipline that don’t involve hitting. There’s a wide range of effective corrective interventions between spanking kids and just letting them run wild.
Post # 7
Science has spoken enough on this topic. Spanking can be harmful to the development of children. it’s not worth affecting their psychosocial wellbeing.
Post # 8
I guess I am just basing this on what has worked in my family!
Post # 9
My husband and I both agree that we will not be spanking our children. There are a million parenting books out there about how to discipline children, teach children how to behave, getting kids to listen to you without spanking. It’s not a choice between spanking and letting kids run wild.
And studies never show any benefits to spanking and some suggest it can be damaging. So, no I wouldn’t be using an outdated parenting method that at best does nothing to benefit the child and could be potentially harmful.
Post # 10
I have been able to get my three year old to stop her tantrums without laying a hand on her. I’m lucky that she’s the type of kid that I can reason with.
I wouldn’t allow anyone to lay their hands on her, my mil believes in spanking, she has spanked my (out of control) nephews but I told her we do not spank my daughter.
It should be noted that my nephews are out of control and hard to be around, and spanking has done absolutely nothing to resolve that
Post # 11
sallyloves90 : Spanking is lazy parenting and based on a primal urge when faced with stress. Kids can absolutely be disciplined without physical violence.
-remove them from the situation
-time out/no engaging until they’ve finished the tantrum
Is this hard? Oh hell yes bc it feels like a punishment for parents too but it shows the child they cannot act that way without consequence
Hitting or spanking shows a loss of control and can escalate tantrums. Lots of bees on here have really high quality scholarly articles on why spanking is harmful.
Also… the “I got spanked and I’m fine” arguement doesn’t hold water because it just means you’re also cool with hitting kids…
Post # 12
Nope. I will NEVER hit my child. He’s six and he is definitely still learning how to be cooperative, but there is no way spanking will get us there. I don’t want him to grow to be a good kid because he fears the alternative. I want him to grow to be a good kid because he has learned appropriate ways to behave in society through love and teaching.
Post # 13
No, I’m Asian. We scare our children without hitting them.
Post # 14
sallyloves90 : studies have proven time and time and time again that spanking does not work. It is discouraged by the AAP. It is always done out of frustration rather than a measured act. It also teaches kids that hitting is acceptable.
Bluntly – it’s lazy parenting. If you do not have the patience to teach your children how to behave without resorting to spanking them then don’t have children. Teaching children takes TIME. You may have to repeat yourself 685,000 times but they will eventually learn.
Post # 15
I should have figured I would get this response from this forum LOL