(Closed) Spanking discussion

posted 6 months ago in Beehive
  • poll: Do you spank or would you spank your kid?
    Yes : (11 votes)
    12 %
    No : (65 votes)
    70 %
    Depends on the situation : (17 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    755 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    No you want kids to behave because they respect you as the authority not because they are scared you will hit them. 

    Post # 3
    Member
    677 posts
    Busy bee

    Spanking sends a terrible message that hitting is okay, and simply does not work. I don’t know what five year olds you’ve been dealing with, but my three year old responds to reasoning. 

    Yeah, we all got spanked as kids but that only made me angry and resentful. It didn’t correct my behavior. 

    Spanking raises the odds of behavioral problems, so good luck with that. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    2827 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    sallyloves90 :  My sister and I were not spanked growing up, and we were well behaved children, of course like all children there were times that we were not so well behaved but we didn’t require spankings to get us to stop what we were doing or learn from our “bad behavior”. 

    If I have children I will 100% not be spanking them, luckily my husband is on the same page.

    Post # 5
    Member
    4825 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2018

    I mean, you can talk about how spanking is “necessary” until you are blue in the face but the fact just don’t agree with you. 

    At best spanking is not beneficial as a means of discipline and at worst it is detrimental. 

    when they do not listen to that, you have to discipline them”

    Spanking is not synonymous with discipline, there are many effective ways to discipline a child that isn’t spanking. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    677 posts
    Busy bee

    You need to educate yourself on methods of discipline that don’t involve hitting. There’s a wide range of effective corrective interventions between spanking kids and just letting them run wild. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    278 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2018

    Science has spoken enough on this topic. Spanking can be harmful to the development of children. it’s not worth affecting their psychosocial wellbeing. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    9374 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2016

    My husband and I both agree that we will not be spanking our children. There are a million parenting books out there about how to discipline children, teach children how to behave, getting kids to listen to you without spanking. It’s not a choice between spanking and letting kids run wild. 

    And studies never show any benefits to spanking and some suggest it can be damaging. So, no I wouldn’t be using an outdated parenting method that at best does nothing to benefit the child and could be potentially harmful.

    Post # 10
    Member
    4764 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    I have been able to get my three year old to stop her tantrums without laying a hand on her. I’m lucky that she’s the type of kid that I can reason with.

    I wouldn’t allow anyone to lay their hands on her, my mil believes in spanking, she has spanked my (out of control) nephews but I told her we do not spank my daughter.

    It should be noted that my nephews are out of control and hard to be around, and spanking has done absolutely nothing to resolve that

    Post # 11
    Member
    2109 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2017

    sallyloves90 :  Spanking is lazy parenting and based on a primal urge when faced with stress. Kids can absolutely be disciplined without physical violence. 

    -remove them from the situation

    -time out/no engaging until they’ve finished the tantrum 

    Is this hard? Oh hell yes bc it feels like a punishment for parents too but it shows the child they cannot act that way without consequence  

    Hitting or spanking shows a loss of control and can escalate tantrums. Lots of bees on here have really high quality scholarly articles on why spanking is harmful.

    Also… the “I got spanked and I’m fine” arguement doesn’t hold water because it just means you’re also cool with hitting kids…

     

    Post # 12
    Member
    588 posts
    Busy bee

    Nope. I will NEVER hit my child. He’s six and he is definitely still learning how to be cooperative, but there is no way spanking will get us there. I don’t want him to grow to be a good kid because he fears the alternative. I want him to grow to be a good kid because he has learned appropriate ways to behave in society through love and teaching. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    268 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2018

    No, I’m Asian. We scare our children without hitting them. 

    Post # 14
    Member
    7123 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    sallyloves90 :  studies have proven time and time and time again that spanking does not work. It is discouraged by the AAP. It is always done out of frustration rather than a measured act. It also teaches kids that hitting is acceptable.

    Bluntly – it’s lazy parenting. If you do not have the patience to teach your children how to behave without resorting to spanking them then don’t have children. Teaching children takes TIME. You may have to repeat yourself 685,000 times but they will eventually learn.

    The topic ‘Spanking discussion’ is closed to new replies.

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