(Closed) Spender's Remorse…?

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 17
Member
3139 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Sorry I don’t say that in a mean way you deserve the wedding of your dreams but now I am confused is all

Post # 18
Hostess
7547 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

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@rbabynorton:  Oh my goodness, are you me? I had seirous issues spending so much money. And while I really enjoyed my wedding day, the day after I still felt bad about the money.

I think you just have to remind yourself of the important things that you’re getting. In my case, I was happy to honor and pamper my friends as bridesmaids and see my family all together – oppurtunities I wouldn’t have unless we had a wedding. 

Post # 19
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I feel your pain. I’m having a hard time coming to terms with the fact its costing a bit over $6k for food and drinks  and i just got two different quotes for my Bridesmaid or Best Man,JBM,MOTB, Mother-In-Law to get their hair and nails done.. another $1k!! UGH… The Fiance keeps telling me not to worry that he loves me and its all for MY day… still makes me sick.

Post # 20
Member
12244 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

We’re spending about 8K on the wedding/honeymoon. I wanted it to be like 5K on both, but costs spiraled. We can totally afford it, but I really did want our day to be cheaper!

But the wedding we’re having is perfect for us, and I’m really excited about it!

We’re having a 45 person morning ceremony at like 10:30 at the church, then having an ultra formal luncheon reception (just the meal, no dancing, etc) starting at noon and ending at 3:30. Then, that night, I’m changing dresses and we’re renting an SUV limo for 17 to go clubbing in Rochester!

Originally we were planning a 15K blow out bash… But I was regretting it before we had even booked a venue! So we decided to have a much smaller wedding this year instead of a huge one next year!

My co-worker, on the other hand, had a 30K wedding, came back to work the following Monday (no honeymoon), and went “Oh my God. I can’t believe we wasted 30K like that, and didn’t even have a honeymoon. We could have put a down payment on a house!”

Post # 21
Member
3617 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

We had an 18 month engagement and pretty much had all our vendors booked within 6 months of being engaged. It was really hard to write all those large checks and not see anything for it for a year. It got even harder when we had to write the even larger checks for all the final payments and still not have anything to show for it. But, I will say. After it was FINALLY our wedding day. It was worth every penny. The bigger shocker is DH even said it was worth every penny. 

Post # 22
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@SpartyOn:  I like that lol!

Post # 23
Member
4654 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@rbabynorton:  I feel the saaaaame way. I keep spending money on this – and we don’t have that much to spend. We’re on the poor side by most American standards and we’re paying ourselves, enough that we could take probably 3 high-luxury abroad vacations at least! We LOVE travel!

We’re not even doing this because WE want it… we kinda do, but not enough that we’d do it just for us. It’s because we live thousands of miles from our friends and family and almost never see them, so it would be really disappointing to them if we didn’t have a wedding they could attend. (I know my family at least would be unable to attend a far-flung destination wedding.)

So here we are, planning this expensive shindig on the other side of the planet… and sometimes I’m just like WHY.

If we lived near them, so we got to see them more, we’d probably be eloping.

So while sometimes I’m excited, other times I’m just like… why do I have to spend all this again…

Post # 24
Member
1845 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I feel your pain. Everytime I put a deposit down, or write another check my heart starts to beat a little faster and I get a little panicky feeling like “is this really worth it”.

My wedding is costing a lot (about $30K including honeymoon for 130 people), and we are paying just over half. I just try to keep reminding myself that we’re doing this OUR way, for us. We aren’t being pressured into doing anything we don’t want.. Every single detail is something we’ve both agreed on. I don’t think i could fork over another penny if I was doing it to please someone else. And truly we are planning a day that we know will be our dream day (and dream honeymoon), so that helps. I’m only doing this once. This is it.. There won’t be any more Pinterest wedding boards for me after this, so I may as well get all the things I want for this one day. No regrets later. 

I should add tho that we already have a house and a son.. So we aren’t putting anything on hold or putting anything off by spending our money on this wedding.

Post # 26
Member
3139 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Ok I can see that with the minimums that is rough… But it will be beautiful 

Post # 27
Member
3723 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Yes, the money part sucks. I’ve got deposits in on everyone and I too feel drained of cash. Unless I want a smaller wedding or more DIY, I guess that’s what it takes to throw a kick ass party.

Post # 28
Member
854 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Compared to the average WeddingBee or even wedding in general, we are spending very little.  I think we will come just over $3K for everything and I still feel guilty.  We are only going to have 25 guests, two in our party (that was a compromise, we wasn’t going to have anyone), no DJ, dancing, video, decor other than what the venue offers which is very nice, favors, $$$ dress, and a lot will be DYI.   The most important deposit we have is for the officiant and we would have just did the JOP but I wanted something more personal and intimate. 

I still think of all the money (even though its not that much) and drive myself crazy.

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