Post # 17
Wheeee! I’m out! I emailed the planner with the truth (because I don’t believe in lying about things like that) and she understood.
I also offered to still uphold my part of the bargain to get them packed with a snack and gas money to get on the road. I feel less guilty about it with that arrangement.
Post # 18
We budgeted our wedding so that we didn’t have to really change our lifestyle to accommodate the wedding. My best friend is getting married 2 months before me and that’s a whole other story lol. It gets pricey with dress/ shoes/ hair/ parties!! There’s still things we need to pay for our wedding!
Post # 19
@TaurianDoll: Try to see the silver lining: you’re going on a trip with friends! It’s a mini vacation where you can lay back and relax and not have to think about wedding planning (or other stressful things)! If everything’s paid for but the food and some extra entertainment, I certainly wouldn’t back out. I wouldn’t splurge on a lobster dinner or anything, but try not to feel bad about spending a little money on yourself.
If you try to have fun, I think the happy memories you make will outweigh any anxiety over money. Unless you really think you’ll spend so much that, on your wedding day, you’ll regret the trip because you couldn’t afford a more expensive flower or an upgraded appetizer. I’d be willing to bet that won’t be the case, though.
Post # 20
@TaurianDoll: You already sound relieved !
Post # 21
@windcriesamy: I thought about it this way as a mini-vacay from the planning.
It would be nice but in reality, I’ve gotta be responsible. I know that I would regret it once I returned.
Post # 22
If you don’t ski and you hate the cold, and you’re trying to save money….why did you agree to go?!
Post # 23
@TaurianDoll: I’m glad they understood when you backed out, at least. I’m also glad you’re relieved! Will you get any of your trip money back, or is it all lost?
Post # 24
@crayfish: I wasn’t engaged at the time that I agreed to go.
@windcriesamy: No, I’m forfeiting the money. It’s okay. It wasn’t a whole lot and I knew that was a risk when paying the money. It was less than $200. (Money I prefer to have right now but I’m not hurting for it)
Post # 25
We have been trying to cut back on everything too for the wedding. Around Christmas family and friends wanted us to do Tacky Light Tours and a trip to a cabin this January. Seems like every month there is a birthday and everyone always wants to go out to dinner. But the wedding is in March. I’m “broke” until the wedding. For the most part everyone has been understanding. But I have to say, now that its so close, I can’t wait until the wedding is over and i can do stuff again. I miss going out to dinner and concerts lol
Post # 26
@Curly W: Yep! I totally understand. 🙂
Post # 27
@TaurianDoll: I’d just tell my friends that I’m exhausted and stressed about spending extra money so I won’t be coming. They’ll get over it.
I’m in the same situation. Every pay day we sock away more savings and stay in A LOT! The only fun we’ve been having is buying a bottle of wine on the weekends and watching a lot of Netflix.
Post # 28
Dear Fiance and I have certainly had to change our lifestyles to afford our wedding. I can’t wait for that part of it to be OVER! Every single thing I want to do or want to buy, it’s always in the back of my mind that I shouldn’t buy it until after the wedding. There are so many things I will wait until after the wedding to buy! We haven’t gone out and done any activities or been to a nice dinner in MONTHS. Last weekend was the first weekend he went out in a while, and it was for his bachelor party.
Even at the grocery store, I sacrifice more expensive foods that I really want, and tell myself we will be able to buy them after the wedding :/
Post # 29
Our date night has become the weeknight that we go to pre-marital classes. Class starts at 8 so we go out for dinner and go over some of the material before class.
We no longer go out after church for Sunday brunch on a weekly basis. We’ve limited ourselves to once a week. We also limited at ourselves to going on double dates to just one a month. The movies are not an option unless we catch a matinee. So expensive!
The one place I DON’T sacrifice is at the grocery store. I like to cook and I love food so if I’m “stuck” at home, I might as well have something good to eat and lots of ingredients to make creative dishes.
Post # 30
I know exactly how you feel! I was invited to a girls trip in Vegas in April and I keep thinking we have a wedding to pay for… we’re buying a new couch and TV when we get back from our trip at the end of the month and I keep thinking that the few thousand we’re spending could go towards the wedding. I can’t wait til it’s all over!
Post # 31
Do you make arrangements in your budget for it or do you tell people you can’t take part?
We have made arrangements in our budget. It’s important to us to still live our normal lives and make sure those around us feel valued and like we aren’t putting our wedding ahead of them. I know that’s not possible for everyone, but I would do my very best not to back out of plans I’d already agreed to and when I did need to decline an invitation I normally would have accepted, I’d try to do something to acknowledge whatever event it was.
For example, if I couldn’t go on a ski trip, I might put together a little hot cocoa basket and send it with the friends with a note that said “So sad I can’t join you guys this weekend, hope you enjoy this and think of me!” I think small thoughtful things that acknowledge that you are sacrificing a bit goes a long way with maintaining the relationship with others.
We try to make some compromises in our budget – we took a trip to Vegas, but we tacked it onto the end of a work trip for me so airfare was already paid for and Fiance used miles he had saved up.
I wanted a new couch (and needed – I had sold mine when selling my home), but I found one on Craigslist I really liked and spent $80 on a couch I’m happy with instead of $600 (and that was a cheap new couch!!). Is it my forever couch? No. But it’s my for now couch, and the tradeoff was totally worth it.
On the other hand, Fiance had already agreed to a boys’ road trip to the F1 race. There was no way he was going to back out of that, and I wouldn’t have wanted him to!
I do think it’s important to not drop everything for your wedding, but I also think it’s okay to make trade offs and be selective. Hope this helps.