Post # 1
Almost 4 years ago I was engaged to a guy, Jared, who was in the military. We had a wedding planned for 3 months after he got home. 2 weeks after he got home he went crazy, said he couldn’t handle having a relationship and all of these responsibilites, so he left and I called off the engagement. While Jared was in Iraq I met a guy and we became friends. We stopped talking once Jared came home. This summer fling found out what happened and contacted me thru myspace. He said he had been thinking about me and wanted to make sure I was okay.
About a year later after everything had settled down, the summer fling and I started hanging out with each other and getting to know each other. That summer fling turned into my Fiance this year. We’ve been dating for a year and a half, live together, and have known each other for almost 3 years. Everytime I go to my grandparents house my grandpa always asks, when my Fiance and I are breaking up, when I’ll find someone new, and when I’ll plan for my other wedding. I had very valid reasons for breaking off my first engagement and it just really bothers me that they speak to me like this. Everyone else had to join in today with my cousins gf talking about how they have 2 kids and one on the way and after 5 years they aren’t married or engaged. I just hate the comments like “Oh, this one won’t last” My grandma sent ME a Christmas card this year addressed to only ME on the envelope and ME on the inside. When I asked her about it today she said that she didn’t know we lived together, Um we have for over a year now and she told my mom a different story. I’m just sick of the disrespect. I’m not a kid, this isn’t some wedding that we pulled out of our asses. Today I told my couisins that we’re getting married in a country club and proper attire is required so no jeans, everyone gave me a look and went “ha, a country club” and rolled their eyes and gave me a dirty look. I’m just irritated about the whole thing.
Merry Christmas everyone. =(
Post # 3
Oh girl I’m so sorry. That is so tough! I think you need to maybe tell them that he has to respect your relationship with this man or you won’t respect your relationship with them anymore. They are being completely rude and horrible to you, it’s not like you broke up with your other fiance on a whim, he has serious problems (I know of other people who have had issues coming back from Iraq so I’m not knocking him in the slightest). I hope that your families become more forgiving. Maybe your parents could talk to them?
Post # 4
I said something to my mom on the way home because we drove together and Fiance had to work all day =( and she said no one will listen to her so theres no point. No one in this family is EVER on my side. It makes me want to forget this whole wedding thing and just go to the JOP.
Post # 5
Oh hun I’m sorry. You should still get your day to shine even though they are jerks!
Post # 6
I’m so sorry they are jerks. I feel the same way sometimes, and when that happnes, I start mentally cutting people from the guest list. It’s evil, but fun.
Post # 7
So sorry. All you can do is plan your amazing wedding with your amazing FI! Hopefully they will soon realize how serious you guys are and be supportive!
Post # 8
Ugh 🙁 I’m sorry you have to deal with that!
The important thing is that you’re marrying the man you love, and like you said, you called the other engagement off for good reasons – so it’s also really a good thing that you aren’t stuck in a marriage that wouldn’t have worked out! It’s a shame that your family can’t see that and be happy for you. 🙁
Would it be easier to just not bring up the wedding around them? Kind of prepare yourself ahead of time not to have their support, and focus on people who are better energy for you anyway?
Post # 9
That sucks. Sometimes people think when they gert old they can say whatever they want. Rude is rude, whether you are a child or a senior.
I’d just blow it off. Your life is your life, not theirs. But you could shoot a quick comeback, like “you’re right, I should have married the wrong guy, just to keep you all quiet”.