(Closed) Spending too much for the wedding compared to our salaries?!

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 3
4824 posts
Honey bee

This is a personal decision that only you can make. Truly.

For me, I would probably be spending less somehow, but then again your guest list is large.

For others, they may spend more as long as they are not going into debt and can pay cash.

I didnt regret spending what I spent on our wedding. Of Course I would have liked it if it could have been cheaper (who wouldnt) but I dont regret the decisions I made. 

There are other factors to consider such as tradition in your circle, will you be getting cash gifts, in which case you may come close to breaking even and therefore it didnt really effect your savings. Or you may not get much of anything and you spent your down payment on a house or your retirement. As long as you are OK with either scenario go with it.

Post # 4
887 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

It wasn’t for us (we’re in our early 20s). We spent 3k on a very, very basic wedding and paid cash for an 85k house instead. You have to decide what’s more important for your future!

Post # 5
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@lefeymw:  Word for word what she said. Personally, I’d try to keep it cheaper- but I’m a glorified cheap-o Tongue Out

Post # 7
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Fi and I are having a 20K wedding, and we make less than you.  We aren’t going into debt over it though, just saving and paying as we go.   His dad MIGHT contribute to the wedding, but I’m somehow doubt its going to happen. 

 I agree with @lefeymw: though, it really is a person decison.  You and your Fiance know what is right.   =)

Post # 8
176 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’m 21 and my Fiance is 28. We’re bring in between 70 to 80, in the rural area where we live it’s pretty good bit we are only budgeting 4k for our wedding. The only help we are recieving is from my mom who offered to get the photographer. we decided on the amount because we are also buying a house this year. I’ve tried really hard to find the best deals on everything to stay within range and I think we will still have beautiful wedding. If that is what the two of you are comfortable spending then go for it… But if you’re questioning check if there any corners you’re willing to cut…

Post # 9
4014 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I agree that how you allocate you money is up to you. It really depends on a lot of circumstances. I will say that my Fiance and I make the same combined salary as you and we’re spending around 10-12K for our wedding. But our circumstances could be completely different than yours! I cant fathom spending more than what we are because all i would do stress over how much it is, how it could be a 20% down payment on a house, or used for other practical things such as student loans. We are putting away enough every month that it doesnt affect our lifestyle in any way and since im a very crafty and artistic person, most of my wedding is DIY which is why im so excited about it! BUT everyone has different prioritys and reasons for their budget, if you are comfortable spending that amount and can afford it without debt, then more power to you!

Post # 10
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I personally do not think it is worth it. Think of what 30k can buy or if you invested that money and to just blow it in one day. I couldn’t do it, i would rather travel, invest in my daughters education, have some savings etc. Some of the best and most memorable weddings I have been to were the low key ones and the expensive ones seem more cookie cutter. If you think about it that is almost half of your combined income, that is a lot of work hours  to pay for one day. In the end obviously it is up to you but as an older bee, 39, I would say that you might want to sit down with your fiancé and make sure this is what you want to spend your hard earned money on. We are having a small wedding and actually spending more on our honeymoon bc that is what is important to us. But everyone is different. Good luck with your decision. 

Post # 11
282 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We’re the same ages as you with similar salaries, and our budget is much lower. However, it sounds like you are going about it very responsibly.  I’d say go ahead and spend the money, as long as it’s important to you and you have the money, which it sounds like you do.  If you decide along the way that anything is not so important, then you can save money there, but since you already have a home and aren’t going into debt, I don’t think you’ll regret having your dream wedding.

Post # 12
10285 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

We make six figures and spent approximately $15k on our wedding ($20k if you include the HM). We received about $8k worth of contributions from our families but the rest was on us. We paid cash for everything.

We’re not homeowners but that didn’t stop us from spending what we spent on our wedding. Sure, we could have put that money towards a nice downpayment but we only plan on getting married once and I wanted the wedding I always dreamed about. It was worth every last cent. 

Post # 13
6116 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Personally that would be too much for me. However, it is a personal decision.

We make $131k combined and had a $10k wedding planned for Jackson Hole, Wyoming – 3 day event too.  Now we are eloping for other reasons, and want to spend $5-6k on our kickass elopement/honeymoon.  We are cheap-Os, but over 46% of our income goes to various retirement accounts.  Everyone has different priorities. 


I’m sure it will be a lovely wedding in the end.  If you are having trouble sleeping at night because of it, then yes, maybe it was too much in hindsight.

Post # 14
4479 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I think if you can afford the wedding without having to go into debt for it, then good for you and go for what you want! The exact number of dollars you spend is a strictly personal choice. Personally, if we didn’t have (significant) help from our parents, we would have spent much, much less (or eloped), just because it wasn’t really something I valued enough to put $30K on the line. But if you do, and you can pay for it, who is anyone else to stop you?

Post # 15
995 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@TXBRIDE2013:  Honestly? No, I doesn’t. Only because the money could be better spent on a downpayment for a house, or paying off student loans or cars, etc. But I  don’t know your finances, maybe you own your own home, have no debts, etc. Still–I can’t help but think of what a kickass honeymoon you could have for 15-20k and spend the rest on a nice ceremony that doesnt break the bank. Because when it comes down to it, it IS one day–a very important one—but you may look back and regret spending almost half of your combined annual salaries on ONE DAY. VS. something that lasts…or even a honeymoon that would be just for the two of you


But some girls have dreamed of their wedding day for their entire lives….if that’s you, maybe it’s worth it…idk I’m not really that crazy about weddings…to me they don’t make the marriage

Post # 16
893 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@TXBRIDE2013:  Tough decision, but it is for you and your Fiance to decide.  In all honesty, if you can have your dream wedding without getting into huge debt, then I say go for it.  It’s a once in a lifetime event. 🙂

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