(Closed) spice it up !

posted 6 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We watch porn and use toys a lot.  Don’t knock toys until you try it.  We love them. 

Post # 4
Member
3668 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

It sounds silly, but I have an app called “iKamasutra” on my iPhone that my SO and I enjoy. It lists different positions by category, has a checklist so you can mark them as “done” or “to do” (you can do this with locations as well — bed, couch, etc.), it has a position of the day, or you can shake your phone and a random position will show up on the screen.

Post # 5
Member
2009 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@mrshersch74:  No toys, no lingerie….

Sexy board game? Flavored lubes? Porn? New positions? New locations? Different time of day? Blindfold? Making your own videos? Ice cream? 

Truly, I suggest toys.

Post # 7
Member
4327 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

For valentine’s day, we didn’t have much money, so we agreed not to buy eachother any gifts. But I didn’t want the sentiment to be lost, because I really DO love and appreciate my husband. So, several weeks in advance, I initiated a hypothetical scenario in which he had plane tickets to anywhere in the world, and I asked him where they were to. His response? San Diego, CA (of all places!!!) So, running with that theme, I went to work. 

I transformed our spare room into a make-shift San Diego: In one corner of the room, I made a “Zoo,” with several stuffed animals that we had lying around. In the opposite  corner of the room, I made Sea World with cutouts of Shamu the Whale, and a nice oceanic background. In another corner, (This is stupid!) I hung up a bunch of our cell phone chargers, and called it the “Chargers’ Stadium” (San Diego Chargers = football team). From the ceiling, I hung a beautiful canopy, and from it hung streamers and hearts. I softened the walls with nice soft muslin fabric, and I lit candles all over the room. 

I had romantic type spa music playing, and outfitted our room with a bowl of grapes, a couple of glasses of wine, massage oils, and other goodies to use. I blindfolded him, and took him to “San Diego,” and he loved his vacation. ๐Ÿ™‚ 

While not exactly my idea, this website might give you some ideas of your own for a romantic night at home: http://www.divinecaroline.com/38/87149-create-romantic-getaway-own-home

Post # 8
Member
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@StuporDuck:  I love that idea!!!  Very cool and creative. ๐Ÿ˜€

Post # 9
Member
3471 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

If you google “intimate games” you’ll come up with a million possibilities for new things to try.  Also, change things up a bit, send him flirty messages, or plan a romantic “picnic” on your living room floor.  pick up a bottle of massage oils (or buy a jar of coconut oil @ the grocery store and natural essential oils at the craft store, melt and combine, pour it into a jar for later–easy organic massage oil). Eatable body paint can also be fun.  Something a friend of mine does with her husband that I’ve never tried, but they swear by is every few months they go on a “first date”.  One of them texts or calls the other and pretends to be someone else and asks them out on a date–they then each invent a new person to be for the evening.  It isn’t about “intimacy” per-se, it’s mostly just to keep things fun; somtimes their alter-egos don’t like eachother and the date ends in a “bust” with one of them storming out; then they each drive home seperately, and laugh about it after– so it’s not really “role playing” in the usual sense, but they have a ball with it.  

Post # 10
Member
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

There is a game that has lots of cards….yes one for each week of the year. Half are for him to read and the other for you to read. I suggest picking a day of the week to pull a card from the bag and by the end of that week the person has to have completed the card. it has things like positions, romantic things to do, things to buy, things to use, etc.

Post # 11
Member
2065 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Have you ever seen this? http://www.mojoupgrade.com/ – You take the survey separately and at the end it shows you what things you both are willing to try or are interested in doing in the bedroom. It may surprise you what things you’re both holding back that you both want to do!

Post # 12
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@mrshersch74:  Those sexy clothes while they end up coming off anyways, are very worth it. Plus you don’t have to take the whole outfit off, it adds some extra visual appeal for your man, and men are all about the visual. I say find a few key things that are inexpensive: thigh high stockings, some sexy heels, a lacy bra and some lacy undies, that will be a good start, your SO will more then appreciate the effort.

As for toys, there is so much out there that is meant to be used together, during sex or foreplay. Find some simple things to help add elimates of intrigue and mystery to your bedroom play. A blindfold and some handcuffs are very inexpensive but think of all the ways you can have fun with them. 

Get some adult games to play together, but make sure you’re willing to do everything they say. Get all dolled up for outtings together and ‘forget’ your undies, then make sure he knows it, by the time you get home he will be full of anticipation and desire, and his anticipation will add to yours. You don’t have to spend tons of money to spice things up, go out to a strip club together, or watch porn together, role play even. 

The biggest suggestion I have is to switch up the time of day you have sex, and take it outside of the bedroom. Many couples fall into a routine where they have sex only certain days and at certain times and always stick to the bedroom. Your home has many surfaces you can use, so start using them! If you always have sex with lights off, then switch it up and keep them on. These little things will help.

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