(Closed) Spin-off – Perhaps they're the ones being unreasonable?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@SpecialSundae:  I didn’t wait. I told Fiance that I was going to order my own diamond and I decided that life was ok without being his wife. I went to grad school, made friends, and worked on myself. He knew that I was serious when I stopped talking about our future and started talking about MY future. 

He had been hinting a lot, and we had one conversation where he said he still wasn’t ready. It broke my heart. I said, “I apologize for my reaction; I’m mad as hell at myself for losing composure and mad as hell at you for dropping hints and not following through. Don’t worry, it won’t happen again. When I want to be a wife more than I want to be with you, I will leave. Until then, dont play mind games with me, and I’m going to Put this marriage business out of my head.”

He knew I was serious and proposed a month later- I didn’t Push him into it, but I wasn’t going to be strung along, either.

Post # 4
Member
1417 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@SpecialSundae:  My SO does not get a free ride! Lol! He knows how much it kills me ( now I know the proposal is coming in october eeee!!!!) But we had a bunch of set backs, money issues. Not like he didn’t have the money, it’s just he was supporting me for a good while. He makes great money but considering when I was making good money also we started buying more cars/toys and such.  Once I got back on my feet ( good job) he started saving more.

  So I guess it’s taking longer because of me lol. Shitty but it’s the truth. Although he could have done without buying ANOTHER motorcycle lol!!

Post # 5
Member
779 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I really tried not to get impatient, but there were times where I would punch his leg and be like; COME OOOOOOON!

And he would be like, let me do it! You have the easy part, just waiting! I have the hard part.

No, I’m sorry, no. Waiting to plan your wedding is torchurous. Not only that, but my Fiance made em feel weird about planning my wedding before I had a ring on my finger. he kept saying to wait and wait and wait.

I’m engaged now but.. Yeah, it’s no fun. And I planned anyway, so now I just have to go get the stuff set up. 🙂 It really is hell waiting though.

Post # 8
Member
1335 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Kempinski San Lawrenz, Gozo

maybe he’s just waiting for you to STOP WAITING and enjoy your relationship. Maybe he wants to see whether the realationship is worth taking to the next level without being rushed into taking the next step. What if he’s just waiting for you to be YOU and not a frustrated bridezilla-to-be? Chances are all he cares about is your relationship, not the wedding and the ring. 

Post # 10
Member
1335 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Kempinski San Lawrenz, Gozo

@SpecialSundae:  I know you’re married, I’ve seen your recaps 🙂 I was just saying “you” as a generalisation…and I understand what you’re trying to say. But on the other hand, I can understand men who prolong the engagement when women start to get frustrated about not getting engaged. It can make men confused, and they start to wonder what their SO’s intentions are. I can imagine a man thinking “does she want a relationship, or does she just want someone to get married with? cos if she just wants ME, well she has me.” Maybe that’s why they prolong it, and I don’t blame them. Because asking a woman to spend the rest of your life with you is no joke and you need to be sure about that shit before getting down on one knee. 

Post # 11
Member
779 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Adams_bee:  

There’s a difference between not knowing he is thinking about popping the question, and just being happy in your relationship and yadda yadda.

But when he takes you to get your ring size, asked what style you like, and we talk about when we want the wedding to be, and then he doesn’t propose for a YEAR after that?

No, that’s ceritified torchur. Surprised

Post # 13
Member
23 posts
Newbee

Waiting is SO hard! I whole heartedly agree with the OP!

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