(Closed) SPIN-OFF TOPIC – Are You Ok with Lap Dances ?

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Are You OK with your BF - SO - Fiance - Husband getting a Lap Dance from a Stripper etc ?

    NO

    YES - Tell me WHY...

  • Post # 78
    Member
    1975 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    strippers fine. itd be like watching porn in 3D. touching no

    Post # 79
    Member
    366 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I couldnt care less about lap dances or strippers. If my Fiance was going to cheat it sure wouldnt be with a stripper. Most men meet their future affairs at work, so you’ve got more to fear from coworkers than the stripper at a bach party or strip club.

    If I came off as jealous and controlling, telling him what he can and can’t do, I probably wouldnt be getting married, and I sure wouldnt appreciate him doing that to me, why on earth would I do that to him? He’s a responsible adult, he doesnt need me saying “Oh no you cant do that, go there, or watch that”.

    Strippers can grind away to their hearts content (not that he goes,he hasnt been since his 20s), its me he’s coming home to.

    Post # 80
    Member
    164 posts
    Blushing bee

    I have no problems with my SO getting a lap dance, I would feel sad for him if he had the opportunity to and turned it down! 😉 Last time we were in Vegas we went to a strip club together with some co workers and both had a few…great time. I don’t see what the problem is at all, it’s just some sexy grindin’ from a lady that 99% of the time could give a crap about whether my guy is into her and is just interested in making some cash! You go girl 😉 Plus I like how sexed up SO gets afterward, more lovin’ for me 🙂

    Post # 81
    Member
    5295 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: January 1993

    It’s not something that DH and I are ok with the other doing. He did not have strippers at his bachelor party, nor would he have wanted to, that’s just completely not his thing.

     

    But if someone else and their SO have determined that they are ok with it, who am I to judge that they must have a weaker/lesser/disrespectful relationship in which the man will inevitably cheat and they will end up bitterly divorced? We can all have our own (strong, it seems) opinions on this, but it’s something that has absolutely no effect on anyone’s relationship but the couple involved. 

    Now if one partner is participating in something that the other is uncomfortable with, that’s a whole other can of worms. 

    Post # 82
    Member
    2582 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Totally perfectly fine with lap dances – even get a kick out of watching him get one.  As long as it remains a once in a while, just for fun type of thing – which it has been in our relationship, I am 100% fine with it.  Having any of this go on in our home though is where I would draw the line.

    I also know a few girls who have been strippers – I wish more of you did – because you might tone down the judgement a bit.

    Post # 83
    Member
    374 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I wouldn’t want to get a lap dance from a guy stripper and I know my Fiance wouldn’t want to get one from a girl stripper.  I’ve gotten one before from when I was single and he has gotten one too from when he was single. And from our individual experiences we just think there is no point they are overrated and we feel like there is no NEED to pay for something like that.

    But if he would ever wanted to go to a strip club I guess I would definately would say no. Having some other girl rub her punani on him just doesn’t roll with me.

    Post # 84
    Member
    4951 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    Nope. And I wouldn’t marry a guy who was okay with them either. 

    Post # 85
    Member
    9164 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    I have no problem with lap dancers, strippers, sex workers, sex shows, porn etc etc. If I was desperate enough for money I would probably even do it. Why would I work 12 hrs a day on minimum wages cleaning bathrooms when I could shake ymy butt on stage for an hour for the same money! Especially if the money was needed for something important like medical care. But regardless of why a woman chooses to become a stripper or sex worker (and there are a lot of reasons why with most of them not sinister/abuse related) it is their choice and the womens movement and sexual revolution was all about giving women choices.

    The main thing that I have a problem with about conversations like this is that it seems like the only persons opinion that matters in this scenario is the womans. I told him no way, I told him if he does it is over. Sorry but to me a relationship is about two people. About both their wants, desires, needs, likes, dislikes. The fact that so many women throw out this ultimatium without even considering what their partner wants is shocking to me.

    If it is not something you want in your relationship fine but you need to find someone that shares your views and not make someone chnage or hide their views to please you. Because in the long run that is just going tocause resentment in your relationship.

     

    Post # 86
    Member
    2546 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    View original reply
    @OliveJuiceHunny:  I would agree that lapdances are waay overrated. However I don’t think they’re a NEED type of thing. It’s more for the entertainment factor & (for some) the way you feel towards your SO. 

    Do I NEED to pay $60 for a tour around the fashion district in LA- no, I can do the damn thing myself. Would I WANT to pay $60 for a tour around the fashion district- hells yes I would- its entertainment, its fun, its exciting, and its different. At the end of the day it’s just a tour…..

    Post # 87
    Member
    391 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    View original reply
    @OliveJuiceHunny:  “punani” lol… I thought that was a HI thing!

    I don’t have anything against the people in the industry. Gotta do what you gotta do. If my man is comfortable with a guy rubbing his body over me then I might consider lap dances for him. Although I would definitely NOT want HIM to pay for it with OUR money.

    Post # 88
    Member
    2582 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    View original reply
    @j_jaye:  (applause)

    Post # 90
    Member
    217 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2024

    View original reply
    @mandypop:  (Hugs)

    Worded perfectly!

    Post # 91
    Member
    366 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    View original reply
    @j_jaye:  Yes!! And honestly, I know far too many men who do it anyway and just dont tell because she’s threatened to  walk, kick him out, make him sleep on the couch etc…

    Face facts ladies, more than 50% of marriages end in divorce. That may very well be you. I’d suggest much better forms of communication because “you cant go to the strip club because I dont want some girl grinding on you and if you do it is OVER” is not going to endear you to anyone.

    The topic ‘SPIN-OFF TOPIC – Are You Ok with Lap Dances ?’ is closed to new replies.

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