(Closed) Spin Off- Uninvited guests, how to deal?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Dealing with uninvited guests.
    Deal with it, accept their presence : (15 votes)
    29 %
    Deal with it, don't acknowledge them : (9 votes)
    17 %
    Ask them/have someone in the party ask them to leave : (25 votes)
    48 %
    Other (explain) : (3 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4432 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    That is beyond rude….if it’s a formal wedding at a reception hall, I would ask them to leave..but if it’s a casual wedding at home or at a beach or something…maybe it’s ok?  I don’t know!

    Post # 4
    Member
    585 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    This woman at my work threatened so many times that she would show up at my wedding even tho she wasn’t invited and it was so crazy. it didn’t happen BUT if it would have you bet id have someone go tell them 2 leave. they wouldn’t have had a place to sit, wouldn’t have had a meal and it would have really pissed me off. so id tell them byebye. thats just me. people! geesh! 

    Post # 5
    Member
    3357 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I had to deal with it. the person that I didn’t invite was the +1 of the best man, and they’re attached at the hip even with how long they’ve been dating (almost 2.5 years now). I absolutely hated it because I cannot stand her, but *sigh* it wasn’t too bad in the end.

    Mostly because it really came down to Darling Husband having his best man with her, or no best man without her. 

    Post # 6
    Hostess
    16213 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    Based on my experience, at least, on the night of my wedding, I honestly couldn’t have been bothered by it. Leading up to the wedding, sure, it was a worry. But by your ceremony/reception, you are so happy, that a lot of things roll off your back that previously wouldn’t have.  Especially if the guest is already there, you’re not going to send them home. I made sure to have a few extra seats at a few tables *just in case.*

    For example, our wedding was strictly no kids, and we made sure that everyone who RSVP’ed wrote back for only the number invited. But of course, one of our friends brought their baby anyway. I didn’t see the baby till we were greeting guests after the ceremony, and at that point, it wasn’t a big deal anymore.

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    88 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I’m not that gracious. If I wanted you there, you would have been invited. If you’re rude enough to show up to my wedding uninvited, then I’m rude enough to show you the door.

    Post # 8
    Member
    5475 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I’d probably not even notice, but the uninvited guest would certainly notice when they don’t have a chair, place card, or meal!

    Post # 10
    Member
    1830 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    If it’s like wedding crashers that I have no idea who they are, hell yeah they are getting escorted out ASAP.

    I like to think that I’m not acquainted with anybody who would be so rude as to invite themselves to an event like that and just SHOW UP, but you never know, I guess. I would probably ignore them completely unless they made a scene (then they get the boot). I guess I can see a couple of my mom’s friends doing this, but I don’t really like those ladies because they are obnoxious to begin with, so they would be my mom’s responsibility.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1830 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    @laurn88:  Here’s the thing; I think that if somebody has the audacity to not only show up when they are not welcome, but bring a guest, they are looking to start something. So, if there’s even a CHANCE that something like this will happen, you need to pre-assign some groomsmen/bridesmaids/parents to watch out for this person and get them out of there ASAP without you even knowing, and before they can start shit, In My Humble Opinion.

    Post # 15
    Hostess
    16213 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    @laurn88:  Yeah, I totally understand. I mean, I honestly can’t fathom someone just showing up who wasn’t invited, but I know it happens. I guess there were just very few things that could phase me by the time we got to the reception. You’re in brand-newly-married bliss!

    Post # 16
    Member
    3357 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @laurn88:  I had to suck it up and shut up, because my Darling Husband was going to be angry with me. He harbored the same feelings about this +1 as well, but wanting his best man there trumped it all.

    I just avoided talking to her as much as possible.

    The topic ‘Spin Off- Uninvited guests, how to deal?’ is closed to new replies.

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