Post # 1
I have to admit, I’ve always hated the idea of man caves. I’m not sure if I can articulate it well but the idea just really rubs me the wrong way.
First of all, I enjoy most of the things that are associated with man caves: sports, video games, etc. We usually watch games together and I like to play on the playstation as much as him. And if we were to have a nice big TV, I’d want it to be in a room where we could both enjoy it.
And most of all, I think I really dislike the idea that a man cannot “be himself” in his own house. We don’t exactly have the same decorating ideas but I think I’d rather compromise than make all the decisions myself and have him not enjoy the house. It was mentioned in the other thread that the women get the rest of the house. Well, why do women automatically get to claim ownership over all the other rooms? I guess I just view it as more our space then his or mine.
Post # 3
Yes. We have opted to forgo the boringly reductive man cave, and instead have dedicated a space in our home to smashing the patriarchy and displaying some tasteful throw pillows.
Post # 4
@SuperKate: I’m completely with you! I would be so mad if he tried to drag away our Xbox.
We only have a tiny apartment, so it’s not like there’s space for a ‘man cave,’ but we wouldn’t do it anyway. We both enjoy similar things, so why would he be segregated? That’s just stupid.
Post # 5
Yep. I already compromised on our future bathroom when we registered… lol. Not my first choice, but it’s his house too, not my house and his little room. I agree, I want a big TV too, and he can play his videogames there if he wants.
Besides, if I let Fiance have a man cave, it would be the messiest thing you’ve ever seen, and I couldn’t stand to have a room that messy. At least he has motivation to help clean rooms that I use too.
Post # 6
Not a fan.
We have a husband & wife cave 🙂
Post # 7
I don’t hate the idea of man caves. I don’t really mind actually. We’re about to close on our new home. And I was all for having what is the bonus room be my husband’s “man cave”. But really it will be just a name for it. We’ll still spend time together in it. But ultimately we decided that we never watch things apart anyway so we’re just going to make it a family/sports room. All sports memorabilia/beer steins etc will stay in that room. We’ll still have a formal living room that we frequently use but I foresee movie nights taking place in the family/sports room. Morning coffee etc taking place in the living room. Our current TV will go into the family/sports room and we’ll eventually get a new TV that will go into the living room.
Post # 8
@regberadaisy: I envision us having that kind of room in the future as well, since we’re both sports nuts. But for us I just view it as a joint room, not his or mine. I think that’s where my dislike of the term comes from.
Post # 9
@regberadaisy: that’s why I want one–so that all of DH’s sports stuff (bobbleheads, footballs, jerseys, etc) can be displayed somewhere, instead of shoved in to boxes (bobbleheads don’t exactly fit the “look” we’ve got going for our place, lol).
Post # 10
I don’t like the idea of him having to have a “cave” to escape me and our future children. Where the f*ck is MY cave, then?! Fiance wants to build himself a little room in our house for his guns and stuff, but his video games and stuff like that will be in our living room.
Post # 11
Yep, I hate the idea too. Why can’t they just enjoy the whole house like a civilized person. I believe there comes a point when guys need to leave the tacky beer signs and whatnot in their youth.
Post # 12
@regberadaisy: This is exactly how I view a “man cave”. Just because we joking call such a space a “man cave” doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t be spending just as much time in there as he will.
ETA: If you can’t tell, I take no offense to the term “man cave”.
Post # 13
Given that Fiance is a musician, his future music room (aka mancave) makes complete sense to me.
Post # 14
I agree… Man caves are such a silly concept. The entire house is as much yours as it is his.
Post # 15
@hana.schmitt: I have no issue if it’s a music room or something to that effect. I just don’t see that as the same as the man caves so prevalent now.
Post # 16
Nah, I don’t hate the idea. I’d actually love my own study someday if we ever have room.