(Closed) Spinoff: Bachelor party, to strip or not to strip?

posted 8 years ago in Grooms/men
  • poll: Would you mind if your fiance had strippers at his bachelor's party?
    No : (118 votes)
    45 %
    Yes : (146 votes)
    55 %
  • Post # 62
    Member
    4643 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    i would not like it at all but i understand it is a rite of passage too. however, my guy wouldn’t want that either.

    Post # 63
    Member
    38 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @Mr.Smithsgirl: Oh yes I would mind he knows it is NOT allowed.  Call me self concius, rude, bitc*, whatever but its not allowed either way.  

    Post # 65
    Member
    104 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    @Annabelle86: THANK YOU! I agree completely with what you said. It’s not that I don’t trust my Fiance, it’s that men are automatically going to think sexual things when a half naked woman is dancing on or around them and it’s disrespectful to the relationship.

    Unfortunately for me, my Fiance has said multiple times that his bachelor party isn’t up to him at all, it’s in the hands of his brother who is also his Bridesmaid or Best Man. This worries me because his brother can be quite a creeper. I’ve been out with them when his brother’s SO was not around and he does things I would be VERY upset with if I found out my Fiance did the same. With that being said, I’m worried of what will go down at my FI’s bachelor party because of whatever his brother decides to do.

    Post # 66
    Member
    133 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Absolutely I’d mind! It’s not a trust thing either because I know he would never do anything it’s just that everything it implies is so wrong. I’m sorry but having half naked/fully naked girls grinding up on your man is not ok in any other scenario, why would it be ok a few days before your wedding? This is just an inmature tradition that degrades the wedding in my opinion. Women are running around making sure that all the details are perfect, stressed out, trying to make sure that the wedding is truly unique and special for the both of them, and the men are what? staring at other girls, drinking, getting lap dances, and completely not in the wedding frame of mind. I have no issues with guys going out for boys night out, having fun, drinking in moderation, and all that, but I have no intention of feeling up any other man before I get married or getting shitfaced the night before the most important day of my life… why should they be encouraged to diminish what’s truly special and meaningfull about that time in our lives? I don’t know, I’m not a prude by any means, but this ritual to me is so completely chauvinistic and selfish. It’s just the principle of the thing…

    Post # 67
    Member
    1477 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Do I mind my fiance looking at naked or half naked women dancing in front of him, or giving him a lap dance?  Um, yeah. 

    Post # 68
    Member
    1477 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    quishi what you said exactly

    Post # 69
    Member
    1697 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Would I stop him? no. Give a list a rules? no. A guy is gonna do what a guy is gonna do. Does it bother me? mostly no but if I were to picture him getting a lap dance, yes that is a disturbing image. I would feel better if he were sober and had his wits about him while all of this was happening though. 

    Post # 70
    Member
    233 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    “Right of passage”… pfff… my fiance knows my feelings on that subject.  😉

    Post # 71
    Member
    10713 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I would be putting our wedding on hold and we’d end up losing a ton of money if I found out there were anything like that to happen (and he knows that). He suggested we have a bach party together and I think it’ll be fun… I doubt I’d have fun without him anyway and all my actual friends are guys so my bach party would be so odd. 

     

    Post # 72
    Member
    6240 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

    I wouldn’t have a problem with strippers, but maybe that’s mostly because I know that SO will NEVER have them- he and his friends’ idea of a good time is staying up until 6 a.m. playing video games together and I doubt that will change in time for his bachelor party! 

    If I saw pictures of him with strippers all over him, I might change my mind.

    Post # 73
    Member
    304 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    i consider this literally cheating on you before or the night before the wedding..this is not a traditional thing in my culture anyway..even if it wasnt; hell nooo

    Post # 74
    Member
    630 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Yep, sorry, not happening. I don’t care if it makes me bridezilla or not, if I find out strippers were involved I will throw the biggest hissy fit and there might not be a wedding.

    I trust my Fiance, I know nothing would happen per se, but it is completely disrespectful to me and the relationship. And I’m not a hypocrite, I would never go to a male strip club or anything like that because I think it’s insulting to my Fiance. This is rooted from my own insecurities too, but I don’t see anything unreasonable about my “no strippers or strip clubs” rule and he isn’t put off by my request.

    Post # 75
    Member
    378 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    My 2 cents:     Regardless of the situation, if your FH wants to go (just for the fun of it – and most really don’t care, especially if it’s a rare occasion or they’ve never even been to a strip club like my FH) and you make a big stink about it, you might be making him want it simply because he can’t have it. Seems like a lot of men are that way (not to be sexist! But I’ve unfortunately seen it with some of my galpals when they acted that way :). If you trust your guy, what are you worried about? What is the difference of seeing a naked woman in front of you that you can’t touch or seeing it on the television or computer screen (which could be accessed without your knowledge at any time anyway)?

    I just don’t get it – of course, if it goes further than the dance, it’s no longer a stripper (is the proper word hooker or prostitute??) so if we’re talking about STRIPPERS…. I say YES. FH has never been to a strip club or seen strippers in person, I want him to get it out of his system now (we’ve been together almost 5 years) for the Bachelor party…. simple psychology is, if I’m OK with him doing it in the future and know he’s doing it (if he did), it wouldn’t be fun for him to go so he wouldn’t end up going. If I restrict it, I create an interest based on the fact that I’m crazy against it.. (Sorry – I’m a doctoral student so I overanalyze everything!!! lol)

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